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Forum: In-Depth Adult Life Discussion Topic: I don't know how to be in my 30s |
| Susan_Sto_Helit |
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Posted: 20 Jun 2016, 12:23 pm
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Replies: 27
Views: 2,317
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| I've seen a lot of very interesting posts here, but unfortunately I don't have time to read them all :( In addition to the perspectives provided here, there is also the fact that the nature of life progression in developed countries has significantly changed in recent years. People have children lat... |
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Forum: In-Depth Adult Life Discussion Topic: I'm HFA and really terrified at the thought of having kids |
| Susan_Sto_Helit |
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Posted: 20 Jun 2016, 11:43 am
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Replies: 31
Views: 3,381
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| I am also HFA. I have four kids. I'm not going to tell anyone it's all unicorns and rainbows, because parenting has sh***y parts no matter how your brain is wired. If anyone says it doesn't, they're lying (or I want whatever meds they're taking). By and large, though, I like being a mom. Nobody who... |
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Forum: In-Depth Adult Life Discussion Topic: I'm HFA and really terrified at the thought of having kids |
| Susan_Sto_Helit |
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Posted: 13 Jun 2016, 1:30 pm
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Replies: 31
Views: 3,381
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| something I didn't see in this thread till now: role of the grand parents in our case: my ASD-mom is not any help, and parents of my wife are 800 miles away, but if you have them nearby they can help A LOT, taking care of the kids few days a week what might also be helpful is taking a long maternit... |
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Forum: In-Depth Adult Life Discussion Topic: I'm HFA and really terrified at the thought of having kids |
| Susan_Sto_Helit |
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Posted: 11 Jun 2016, 5:51 pm
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Replies: 31
Views: 3,381
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| Good post, Susan. At least you are in touch with your thought process on this. It is tough in your 30s when others constantly nag you about having kids. I've come to realize that while I love children, I definitely don't want any due to the sensory overload. I can deal in small doses, and like the ... |
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Forum: In-Depth Adult Life Discussion Topic: I'm HFA and really terrified at the thought of having kids |
| Susan_Sto_Helit |
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Posted: 07 Jun 2016, 8:09 am
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Replies: 31
Views: 3,381
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| They keep saying it gets better. Yeah, and then they become teenagers. :twisted: But it will get better. When they become 18 and move out of the house (hopefully). :twisted: :twisted: Yeh, exactly my thought process... :? What if you adopted a child of a few years of age? That would bypass you need... |
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Forum: In-Depth Adult Life Discussion Topic: I'm HFA and really terrified at the thought of having kids |
| Susan_Sto_Helit |
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Posted: 05 Jun 2016, 7:47 am
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Replies: 31
Views: 3,381
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| At the time, I didn't know I had Asperger's, and I didn't know my children had it. But they were not typically noisy, nor the house chaotic. You can train children to be respectful of the home atmosphere (if you want to run and yell, do it outside) just like you can train them to wait until after b... |
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Forum: In-Depth Adult Life Discussion Topic: I'm HFA and really terrified at the thought of having kids |
| Susan_Sto_Helit |
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Posted: 05 Jun 2016, 7:46 am
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Replies: 31
Views: 3,381
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ASPartOfMe wrote: Have you discussed this with your husband?
Yup. The conclusion is as stated in the OP |
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Forum: In-Depth Adult Life Discussion Topic: I'm HFA and really terrified at the thought of having kids |
| Susan_Sto_Helit |
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Posted: 04 Jun 2016, 5:45 pm
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Replies: 31
Views: 3,381
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| Yes, it is as bad as it seems. I use earplugs everyday. If you have a PhD, you can probably afford child care or just let your husband stay home and deal with the kid. There is a lot of anguish, everything gets trashed, smells of poop, and the crazy screaming fills the house. The lack of sleep hurt... |
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Forum: In-Depth Adult Life Discussion Topic: Getting to know each other, Dino-style |
| Susan_Sto_Helit |
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Posted: 04 Jun 2016, 5:00 pm
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Replies: 606
Views: 244,729
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| What is your first name? I'm anonymous on here Age: 30 Location: South of England Current perseverations: Drawing, gym, reading, politics When did you discover AS? When my younger brother was diagnosed. I was around 13 Do you have other psych diagnoses? Do you have a degree? Three if you count the ... |
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Forum: In-Depth Adult Life Discussion Topic: Concerned About Moving In With Housemate |
| Susan_Sto_Helit |
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Posted: 04 Jun 2016, 4:49 pm
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Replies: 1
Views: 476
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| Does she know that you're autistic? I think it would be fine as long as you laid down some ground rules at the beginning. Don't try to be 'normal'. But if there's anything you do at home that you think might be objectionable you could bring it up in advance and discuss it. That will probably take th... |
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Forum: In-Depth Adult Life Discussion Topic: Shoes are a very important part of the wardrobe? |
| Susan_Sto_Helit |
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Posted: 04 Jun 2016, 4:42 pm
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Replies: 16
Views: 1,393
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| It depends. Don't wear trainers to a job interview. Some people are very fashion conscious and will check out what others wear, but others won't. I don't think your husband is abnormal, but that doesn't mean he's normal and a model of what society expects of you either. He's probably just more inter... |
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Forum: In-Depth Adult Life Discussion Topic: I'm HFA and really terrified at the thought of having kids |
| Susan_Sto_Helit |
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Posted: 04 Jun 2016, 4:37 pm
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Replies: 31
Views: 3,381
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| Hi folks, I'm married (4 years now) and hit my 30s this year. I have a HFA diagnosis. I've been stressing about the prospect of having/raising children for a very long time. It became more of a big deal once I got married, and also this year when I reached 30. Once we married, suddenly the whole wor... |
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