| Author |
Message |
Forum: Adult Autism Issues Topic: Sex |
| LonelyTogether |
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Posted: 31 Mar 2019, 7:58 am
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Replies: 56
Views: 754
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| To the original poster and LonelyTogether - I am NT (as described on this forum) and my ex is I'm 99.9% certain on the spectrum. I am as certain as one can be without an official diagnosis. He experienced significant sexual dysfunction and most of our marriage fit the technical definition of sexles... |
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Forum: Love and Dating Topic: Is it time to stop trying? |
| LonelyTogether |
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Posted: 31 Mar 2019, 7:47 am
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Replies: 15
Views: 932
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| We spoke this weekend, and he was very receptive and concerned. He thought that things were fine and that he was making a conscious effort but admits that he is bad at it. I told him that it just feels like we are trying to fit a square peg in a round hole, and we are periodically spinning it to try... |
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Forum: Adult Autism Issues Topic: Sex |
| LonelyTogether |
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Posted: 19 Mar 2019, 8:58 pm
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Replies: 56
Views: 754
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| I personally think that if these women crave intimacy they should seek it elsewhere. Just as being married doesn't entitle you to sex, I also don't think it entitles you to withhold sex without a legitimate reason. If those women cheat, I wouldn't condemn them for it. If cheating isn't a sufficient... |
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Forum: Adult Autism Issues Topic: Sex |
| LonelyTogether |
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Posted: 19 Mar 2019, 8:47 pm
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Replies: 56
Views: 754
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| [/quote] I would say this to NT partners everywhere: Your autistic partner may not, can't or won't necessarily communicate the same ways that you do. Faulting them rather than figuring out how to communicate with them will never lead to a positive outcome.[/quote] In the beginning of our relationshi... |
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Forum: Love and Dating Topic: Is it time to stop trying? |
| LonelyTogether |
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Posted: 16 Mar 2019, 7:34 pm
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Replies: 15
Views: 932
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| It is not an abusive home If he drinks to the point he needs medication, drives when drunk, is a lousy parent and shows no affection, it is definitely an "abusive home". I can't fathom that you're worried about anything beyond the welfare of your kids. He is not on meds for alcoholism and... |
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Forum: Love and Dating Topic: Is it time to stop trying? |
| LonelyTogether |
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Posted: 16 Mar 2019, 3:46 pm
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Replies: 15
Views: 932
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| He was officially diagnosed? If so, how long has he you known this? When you say chemical dependency and DUIs (plural), do you mean him? Both of you? You also mention parenting which indicates that there are children in the house. If there is active drug or alcohol abuse in the house and there are ... |
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Forum: Love and Dating Topic: Is it time to stop trying? |
| LonelyTogether |
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Posted: 16 Mar 2019, 3:28 pm
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Replies: 15
Views: 932
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| This is the tip of the iceberg...we also struggle with parenting, finances, chemical dependency leading to DUIs, and loss of interaction with friends and family. You want to sleep with a man who has poor parenting skills, a drug addiction and DUIs?! Have any of you made it through situations like t... |
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Forum: Love and Dating Topic: Is it time to stop trying? |
| LonelyTogether |
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Posted: 16 Mar 2019, 1:32 pm
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Replies: 15
Views: 932
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| This was posted first in what looks to be an OLD forum, so I am posting again in hopes of honest feedback. I am NT and married to an Aspie. We have been married for 3 of our 8 years together. We tend to go through a few types of cycles, and I don't know how much energy I can put toward the relation... |
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Forum: Love and Dating Topic: Question to the ladies: Wouldn't you wish a life like this? |
| LonelyTogether |
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Posted: 16 Mar 2019, 7:53 am
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Replies: 43
Views: 1,619
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| I would absolutely love not worrying about covering rent and other bills, but I need a sense of purpose and accomplishment. I loathe being around people who don't feel that way and somehow only work on their sense of entitlement. I would love the ability to hire a housekeeper or the option to go on ... |
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Forum: Adult Autism Issues Topic: Sex |
| LonelyTogether |
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Posted: 16 Mar 2019, 7:34 am
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Replies: 56
Views: 754
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| To be fair, even though many of us on the spectrum have touch sensitivities (including me) we're not all averse to co-sleeping. Fair enough, but the OP needs to realise we can't solve this mystery. She needs to talk to her husband and learn more about his ASD, whether it's relevant to his behaviour... |
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Forum: Love and Dating Topic: Professional cuddlers |
| LonelyTogether |
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Posted: 16 Mar 2019, 7:23 am
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Replies: 26
Views: 1,585
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| I am NT with an Aspie husband. Over the years, we have lost intimacy. We did cuddle early in our relationship, but like many things from the early days, it now happens maybe 1-2 times per year. One time, when I told him how lonely I feel lying in the same bed night after night without touching unle... |
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Forum: Love and Dating Topic: Is my gf being supportive of me, or no? |
| LonelyTogether |
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Posted: 15 Mar 2019, 10:57 pm
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Replies: 6
Views: 729
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| Telling someone not to worry when they are stressed is most often intended as support especially when you see someone is struggling but you aren't sure of more specific words to use in the situation. |
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Forum: Love and Dating Topic: Is it time to stop trying? |
| LonelyTogether |
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Posted: 15 Mar 2019, 10:44 pm
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Replies: 15
Views: 932
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| Is this the same husband who is constantly cheating on you and lying to you? If so, you need to leave and get a divorce because it sounds like you are married to a s**tbag. Whether he is actually autistic or not is kind of irrelevant at this point. No, thankfully in this case, I have been mistaken ... |
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Forum: Adult Autism Issues Topic: Sex |
| LonelyTogether |
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Posted: 15 Mar 2019, 10:35 pm
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Replies: 56
Views: 754
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| To be fair, even though many of us on the spectrum have touch sensitivities (including me) we're not all averse to co-sleeping. Fair enough, but the OP needs to realise we can't solve this mystery. She needs to talk to her husband and learn more about his ASD, whether it's relevant to his behaviour... |
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Forum: Adult Autism Issues Topic: Sex |
| LonelyTogether |
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Posted: 15 Mar 2019, 7:58 pm
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Replies: 56
Views: 754
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| So is there a middle ground when one partner is no longer interested? Is it worse to ask someone to continue to show affection or to ask someone to stop caring about receiving affection? |
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Forum: Adult Autism Issues Topic: Sex |
| LonelyTogether |
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Posted: 15 Mar 2019, 7:46 pm
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Replies: 56
Views: 754
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| It goes where all other satiated desires or curiosities go. Many people lose their sex drive once the relationship is established, because there are no new sensations to explore. I hate to be harsh but it's true, and even more so for people on the spectrum who are often hypersensitive to touch in t... |
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