I think i've caught "Computer Neurosis"

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I've been using computers for 15 years, and thus the things i've worried myself with over the past few months shouldn't be bothering me, but it has.

I had an old computer that was basically on its last legs anyway. It had a teeny hard drive, small memory and Windows 2000 and when it basically became so slow and awkward to use this summer that I had to junk it, it was really nothing to me. I bought a reasonably better computer with slightly better specs off of Craigslist from someone who - coincidentally enough - I knew.

However, since I got that computer (and a couple laptops that have come and gone since, read below for that) i've somehow developed a psychosomatic condition i'm calling "Computer Neurosis". Basically, I have become afraid to use Google because I think that every result will give a virus-infected site with a difficult to notice spoofed name that had been "Googlebombed" to the top space. Because I somehow think my computer "awkwardly" does it, I have avoided copy and pasting stuff online, so I have to copy stuff manually from, say, one page to another. I avoid writing long enough posts on forums that a scroll bar appears because it sometimes cuts off lowercase p's and stuff. I've stopped downloading MP3s off of not only blogs by people I know and have trusted for years (and as such my friendships with some of these people may have suffered because they are baffled that I don't trust their site anymore, which is entirely my fault because i've never had a problem), but the websites of artists, labels and publications (like Spin Magazine or Pitchfork Media) that have links to legal MP3s. I've even grown to question Firefox's update prompts from add-on and the program itself (it took me 5 minutes to convince myself that the Firefox had really found a new update to 3.6.13 and something hadn't got into my computer). I've actually stopped listening to albums I own with an "FBI Piracy Warning" on them because I've become convinced that when I put them in my computer, it will secretly download something to my computer like Copy Control. And in general, I keep thinking that my computer (or other computers I own) have been infected by viruses undetectable by my chosen antivirus. In fact, I have avoided logging on to any passworded website (like Twitter or Facebook) on public computers.

And what do I have to show for all this? Nothing. No evidence, aside from a bug in one program I use that other users are very well aware of and is basically otherwise harmless to my computer and a couple of bugs and problems that I had fixed for me by a couple computer help websites that other users on that forum knew about or had, so I wasn't alone and it wasn't caused by a virus or malicious code or stuff like that.

Basically, I have stopped doing things I love (like finding new sites through outlinks from sites I love, Google searching and downloading free and legal mp3s) because I believe that all of them will cause problems with my computer because I have become paranoid and neurotic over things that I know don't exist.

I've started to use another computer (that I don't log in to) to convince myself that stuff is supposed to be like that (my "Two Computers" theory - if I see it on two unconnected computers, its not my problem), like how the buttons on the top of this site are supposed to be big (because I'd forgotten they'd been changed).

Writing all this down and seeing how daft all the things I've convinced myself of has sort of calmed me down from stuff, to the point where this all looks so embarrassing. I've had to tell people to sum up a link instead of me clicking it (I use the "rickroll" excuse, but its becoming tired because that's so 2007 now) and if I really want to look at a link linked in a forum to a site in my favorites, instead of clicking that link, I have to go to the listing in my favorites and dig for it.

What can I do to convince myself to stop worrying and love the internet again? This is not something that someone who has used a computer for 15 years should be acting. It is the behavior i'd expect from a 45 year old housewife who believes in those ridiculous Finally Fast commercials.

PS: While typing this, I accidentally found out that ctrl+backspace in Firefox deletes the last whole word I typed. I should use that one more often so it doesn't freak me out when I do it

Also, I see that Wrongplanet is still using the version of phpBB that when you place an emoticon from the Emoticon menu, it jumps all the way back to the top of the post you're writing when you click on the emoticon you want instead where you put the darned emoticon. And that's one legitimate reason why i'll still manually type out the emoticon codes anyway.

Last edited by DocStrange on 16 Dec 2010, 1:36 am, edited 1 time in total.

Wow. I have never heard of anything like this. It sounds like you had one bad experience and developed a phobia. I have crashed many computers, and you can always wipe your drive and reinstall the OS if worse comes to worse. I am sorry to hear that you won't be friends with people because of an accidental virus. Those sort of things happen, and it's really only the virus creator's fault. And, not trusting sites in general is a tad bit on the paranoid side. You have a very interesting story, and I hope that there is some way that you can overcome your fears. There is no advice that I can really offer, but I wish you the best of luck.

Yes, I think i've become Woody Allen. I'm a little embarrassed about telling people about this, too, but I thought that writing it all out would make me realize how bizarre this paranoia is.

The bad part is that I had no bad experience that I can trace this back too. There is no virus at all. I have not gotten a virus on any computer. i've just become neurotic.

I haven't stopped being friends with anyone, I just phrased that weirdly. The people i've told who run those blogs are more baffled than upset. I can't blame them.

I've never gotten a virus from downloading anything and i'm hope this will pass when a band I like releases a song I really want to hear.

Last edited by DocStrange on 16 Dec 2010, 1:43 am, edited 1 time in total.

I also hope that this ends up passing from you because this sort of things can make it difficult to use the Internet and computer in general which just isn't awesome to say the least.

Get an antivirus and make sure you have a firewall. Antiviruses have a database that keeps track of every possible malicious program, and firewalls make sure the said malicious programs don't have access to the internet. I believe it also covers keyloggers.

The chances of you finding a virus in an .mp3 file by simply playing it is virtually nonexistent. Same goes for websites, you have Firefox; it actually has a phishing filter built in that lets you know if the site you're visiting is a phishing site, and it prompts you if you want to continue going there or not.

I believe the RIAA only targets users who use BitTorrent, since it shows the IP addresses of the sharers. I've never heard of someone ever getting in trouble downloading from sites like MegaUpload or Mediafire. So you should be good with downloading via blogs.

If you want to be extremely radical you could get a Mac since it only has a relative-few viruses made for it, but it's more expensive.

1. I have an antivirus. I use AVG on one and Avast on another.
2. I've been told over and over "getting a virus in an .mp3 file is impossible" but I never seem to remember that.
3. I download from blogs because the record industry either turns a blind eye to blogs, thinking them as free publicity or, especially with indie labels, actively embraces them and sends them mp3s. I stopped using BitTorrent a long time ago. I used to Mediafire/Megaupload to share albums with friends, but I stopped that because you never know what's really in those zip files... I don
4. I was thinking about getting a Mac or switching to Linux because of the lack of viruses, maybe I should invest in something like that, because its gotten easier to transfer files between a PC and a Mac or Linux now (also I don't have to buy a new Linux version if I want to keep being supported like I have to do every 7 years with Windows)

Really, writing this down and realizing how crazy it all sounds makes me feel alot better.

Arman has a good point. Installing a recent distribution of linux (Xubuntu or Jolicloud) only takes 30 minutes and puts your computer back in a "clean" state.

Besides, if most of your personal data is "in the cloud" (gmail, picasaweb, forums, etc) why care about what happens to your local computer.

If you are really worried, you can even *always* boot from a live linux CD (the distributions above both have one), so nothing *at all* can happen to your computer.

For a long time I was worried that if I log on to a forum/gmail/other cloud site on a computer I perceived to have a problem, it would in turn cause a problem on not just that account, but also the next computer I log onto that account with.

Once, I checked my mail on a computer I suspected of having "undetectable issues" and then didn't check it again for a week because I thought it would transfer that computer's problems to the another computer.

And now you know the basis of psychotherapy...

Perhaps having a Linux distro would help - there are fewer hackers trying to find exploits in it than in Windows (it's popular to hate Microsoft, but since Linux is open-source, there's no central conglomerate to hate), and it sounds like all the software you need is available to run under the Penguin. And as pointed out, even if you don't have a protected backup of the distro on-site, they're easy (and often free) to obtain online. (I'd recommend burning a backup CD just in case, the moment you do your clean install, so there's nothing to fear.)

Linux was an idea, and I know someone who could hook me up with some distribution, so next time I see him i'll ask him about it.

I'm hoping to get over this by the time the blogs I still follow release their top songs of 2010 lists in a few weeks, so I can catch up with five months of music I missed. I know there's no reason I should believe that Pitchfork (a large and popular webzine) or the website of an artist will give a virus with an mp3. mp3s can't carry viruses anyway.

Also, i've slowly started to trust that Google results won't "googlebomb" me to a spoof page anymore. So that's a decent step in the right direction.

I use Google regularly, and it warns me when it encounters a malicious site. What, do you think Google is in league with the crackers or something? It's a company, not a cybergang.

And for all you people using the word "hacker" to mean "someone who writes viruses and breaks into servers", that's a cracker, not a hacker. A hacker is someone like me who is passionate about computers and likes to figure out how to do neat things with them.

I'm a lot like the OP, I get very paranoid. I have top security and encryption on everything, I can't use the internet without NoScript, and if anything goes weird on a computer or a gadget I own, I start thinking it's been hacked. Hell, I even run virus scans on my Mac!

I don't go as far as not to use Google or anything, though. NoScript should stop any exploits from even running, and it lets me force SSL on Facebook and the like, too, as well as protecting me from "clickjacking" XSS attacks, so I feel pretty safe with it on.

I also check my list of running processes every so often to make sure there's nothing dodgy there, and I've made my main account a normal user so dodgy apps can't get admin access unless I give it to them.

Last edited by Asp-Z on 17 Dec 2010, 8:25 am, edited 1 time in total.

I used NoScript for a while, but didn't like it that much. It didn't need that much security.

A few days ago I bought "Plants vs. Zombies" for my PC from Walmart (I don't buy computer games all too often but I bought it because I liked it and it was cheap) and since then I've been too paranoid to even put the disk in my computer because I believe it has some drm or Copy Control or something that will cause harm or inconvenience to my computer. I sometimes do this with albums I buy that have an FBI Anti-Piracy Warning on the back because i'm sure it has something similar, even though i'm sure i've played CDs with those warnings on computers before without any ill effect.

Even though I'm pretty sure that installing this game is going to do nothing harm my computer, I've abstained from putting it in my computer, partially out of this fear, as I haven't bought a computer game in 5 years, I don't know what they put in PC games now, even small casual ones from a company I trust like Pop Cap.

So basically, i'm worried about attacks or slowdowns coming from both Russian hackers and companies who I gave money to.

I have AVG on one computer and Avast on another (why I don't have Avast on the other computer is a long story involving a legitimate bug on some computers), but I seem to be thinking "How do I know if its working if i'm not seeing anything?"

I think one of the first steps is to just put that CD-Rom in my computer and install that stupid game already, and maybe play that White Stripes CD I borrowed from the library with that Piracy Warning on it, later.

What didn't you like about it? I know setting it up to allow scripts from your regular sites is a bit annoying at first, but once that's done it's rarely an inconvenience. It does a pretty solid job of blocking ads, too.

I do that also because my computers that I always buy break every two years. Just do it and don't thin about it, get up to date spyware protection and you should be alright.

I liked it, but when I used it, I didn't like having to allow a YouTube video every single time I refreshed the page. Embarrassingly enough, after I removed it, I found out that I didn't have to do that and there was an easier way. I never installed it on my Firefox when I got my new computer, but was eventually planning to.

Right now, i'm happy to know that
1. Just simply using Firefox (or indeed anything that isn't IE) is already a starting point in keeping a large chunk of the nasties off my computer, as is having Ad Block Plus installed
2. .mp3s can't carry viruses/spyware/etc.
3. That game I bought probably won't install anything else aside from the game (does anyone else have a boxed copy of "Plants vs. Zombies" installed on their computer, just to be sure?)

I really need to stop worrying that every computer has something on it that will affect my accounts on websites if I log onto it from another computer. I shouldn't be afraid to check my mail on a public computer.

I'm started to build up enough assurance from other people who tell me that this whole neurosis of mine is ridiculous. I have never gotten anything nasty on my computer from the things i'm worried about (logging onto an account on a computer I perceive as "infected" - most of them aren't, downloading mp3s from blogs and sites that have rights from the label or artist to host them). I don't know what copy protection on CDs or computer games does to my computer in the long term, though, if the albums and games I own actually have any. The "FBI Piracy Warning" doesn't always mean "this disk is copy protected and will install secret files onto your computer".

I kind of know in the back of my head that nothing or very little of what i'm scared of is real, but I still can't really convince myself otherwise. Not even a year ago, I wouldn't have been this paranoid to put in a copy of a popular computer game likely purchased by hundreds of thousands and published by a company I otherwise trust that I purchased from a well known store into my computer because of an ambiguous possibility of "DRM" or something else being installed along with the game. But here I am. Indeed the fact that I am paranoid to do so is what finally convinced myself that I need to write this down somewhere because its becoming ridiculous.