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Hmm... how to start, I'm always horrible at introductions, I guess I'll start at... the beginning!

Well, first off, I've never been diagnosed with anything, and my sole source of research has been things which I've read from the internet (however trustworthy that source may be).

Ok, I guess the beginning would start with things that my mom has told me about when I was a baby, since I don't remember that time period. From when I was an infant, I apparently couldn't get to sleep if there were any lights turned on, or any sounds in the room. I'd also apparently start bawling if there were any loud noises any room I was in, such as TVs and fluorescent lighting.

Move forwards a few years (when I start being able to rely on my own memory)...

Off to school! A gigantic school of a whopping 40 students, K-8. I have amazing difficulty on timed tests for math, because I absolutely refused to just memorize the tests like the other students, or memorize the simple problems (5+3, 6+2, etc). Instead, I'd calculate each and every answer, making sure to get each one perfect, each time I took the identical test. To this day, I *still* don't have the multiplication tables memorized. At recess, while everybody else played random sports, I'd just run laps around the playground, to get some time alone.

Into the upper grades...
Suddenly, I'm no longer the slowest one in my grades at math, since now I'm allowed to use a calculator for simple math (adding/subtracting/multiplication/division), yet I can easily visualize more complex math problems, and enjoy the puzzles. For recess, I now have a new pastime, because the school receives an amazing new toy! An Apple II! From now on, recesses are spent figuring out how to make computers do things using BASIC (which, incidentally, makes algebra a breeze later on). In English, I seem to be a spelling and grammar nut, correcting any and all spelling/grammatical errors that I notice (which quickly gets on the nerves of people). Other than corrections, I tend to not really say much to anybody, unless it's about one of my obsessions, such as, at that time... sharks, legos, or computers.

Then, there's the terror of High School... suddenly, there's 200-300 people in 9th-12th grades, and so I jump right into academics, pretty much having no social life. People start making fun of some of my quirks, which didn't happen at the tiny elementary school. Things like me stacking random objects in science class when I was finished with tests, carefully making sure that it wouldn't fall over. Or *always* moving some part of my body, whether it's my hands, legs, or fingers (hurrah for computers, where typing can mask most of that). However, social studies was the worst. Everybody has a speech to give, and as it approaches my time to speak, even though I have everything that I'll have to say prepared, I break into a sweat. When I get up to speak, I start talking, and then quickly get a nervous breakdown, and start crying, unable to continue. Pretty much any speech that I have to do in that class ends the same way, with the teacher afterwards giving the speech just to them, when I do fine.

A few years after I graduate, I somehow stumble upon some websites talking about AS, and read some stories, and think, "Hey, this seems like the story of my life!" I get obsessed with it for about 3-6 months, but then my obsession switches to World of Warcraft for about a year, and I don't think much of it... until now.

Just recently, I met in person somebody who I've known for years only over the Internet. As long as we talk about my interests (currently computer programming, and my giant collection of computer generated music), I do all right talking with him. But last night, he called me rude, and started yelling at me (I think, I've never been very good at reading body language or tone of voice), all because I refused to shake the hand of a co-worker of his (who didn't offer his hand, either). I don't know why, but I hate shaking hands, or having any other physical contact with anybody, really, so I avoid it as much as possible.

Somehow that got me to thinking about AS again, which I've brought up to him, thinking that there's a possibility that I might have it, but he refuses to think that I could, and that if I did, I'd need "fixing". I've been tempted to see if I could get an official diagnostic (to confirm one way or another if I really do have AS), but I'm worried at the same time that if I am diagnosed, they would also try to "fix" me.

And that brings me here, which I just found by doing some random searching on AS, after having taken the quiz at rdos [dot] net, and getting the following results:

Your neurodiversity (Aspie) score: 184 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 10 of 200
You are very likely an Aspie (neurodiverse)

Diagnostic prediction for Score Prediction
Asperger/HFA/PDD 198 You very likely will be able to receive the diagnosis
OCD 174 You very likely will be able to receive the diagnosis
ADD/ADHD (Attention Deficit Disorder) 172 You very likely will be able to receive the diagnosis
Bipolar 152 You very likely will be able to receive the diagnosis
Social phobia 147 This isn't a primary diagnosis you should seek
Dyslexia 72 This isn't a primary diagnosis you should seek

I'm not really sure what I should do, or even if I really have a question, I just felt like I had to dump what I had on my mind somewhere, to get it written down.

Welcome to WP!

To WrongPlanet!! !

Eek, just skimmed over my brain dump, I didn't mean to write that much! Thanks for the welcome.

Nice to meet you, KFleshman.

No problem KFleshman, I can't think of a better place than this than to offer a nice braindump.

Welcome to WP. I'm new myself and already I feel at home here...

While I'm posting random stuff, I guess I could post a list of a few "Hey, that's me!" things I've noticed from random things I've read about AS.

• Clueless about tone of voice/body language
• Uncomfortable keeping eye contact
• TVs hurt, a lot (that incredibly loud squeal)
• Fluorescent lights are annoying
• When I obsess over something, I tend to think about *nothing* else, until the obsession goes away
• When I start talking about something I'm interested in, I'll keep talking, oblivious as to whether anybody else is interested (or sometimes even if I know they aren't, just because I have to get it out of my system, I guess).
• Routines. Showering (if I get distracted, have to start from the beginning). Eating. (Eat one type of item until it's gone, turn the plate, eat the next type of item, turn the plate, repeat until done).
• Aversion to being physically touched. I only receive hugs from my grandparents, and even that is uncomfortable.
• I was a "little professor" as far as talking/writing was concerned when I was in ES, and to this day I still take *everything* literally.

Welcome to WP KFleshman, I always found it nice to read rants or 'brain dumps' as you call them, they offer a great view into the mind of a person, and isn't that waht this particular forum is for?

Not sure if this'll work or not, but here was the little graph thing it gave me at the end of the quiz:

EDIT: Nope, no URLs for me, I'm too young.

www [dot] rdos [dot] net [slash] eng [slash] poly12b [dot] php?p1=95&p2=91&p3=96&p4=100&p5=88&p6=97&p7=84&p8=99&p9=82&p10=75&p11=91&p12=95

Hi KFleshman and welcome to the "right" Planet

If your on the autism spectrum or not, your still the same person just may think and seeing things a little differenlty, with understanding comes growth...

Welcome KFleshman!

KFleshman, I think you were after this: RDOS dodecagon. Try hitting the "Quote" button to see how it is structured.

Welcome to WP.

Yup, that's what I was after, but this account isn't 5 days old, so it wouldn't let me post URLs yet. (At least that's what the error said)

I think Alex may have just added this "feature"... without telling anyone.

Hi!

Welcome to Wrongplanet!

I hope you enjoy posting here!