New Mom (to the forum, not the kid)

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I found this forum accidently, and have been searching for something like this for a long time. My son was diagnosed with Asperger Syndrome at 9yrs. He's now 15. We've gotten over the MAJOR hurdles that come along with it, but of course we still battle the school system, and eachother during the school year. (what family doesn't?)
I'm going to ask if he'll join the forum also so he can ask questions of people who may be better able to explain things to him. He likes video games, art, and he's extremely bright.
My main concerns are what's going to happen after his high school graduation. He HATES school and while I know college would be easier, I'm not sure he'll go for the idea. He's also not quite cut out for manual labor either.

Welcome to WP!

Hi Liz217- welcome to WP!

You're more then welcome to send him our way, just understand that he may not want our help. Seeing as he's known since he was 9, he may be looking for answers. Then again, he could already be to the point where he believes he knows enough.

For your own sake, know that MANY aspies HATE school. It doesnt necessarily mean we wont go to college sooner or later. It might take us a little longer, and we might not succeed the first time. Its a difficult life change and if you havent figured it out yet, aspies hate change.

The best advice available would be to encourage him to find a passion. Tell him to look inside himself and find what would mean the world to him if he could do it. Anyone can do anything, as long as they put thier mind to it. Some of us have served this country(though most were undiagnosed beforehand), some have become scientists and engineers. Many of us are creative with music or poetry, art and design. There's a skill somewhere waiting to be unleashed on the world.

I hope he does come, even just to finally understand he isnt alone. That there are 1000's of us, and we've contributed in this society for millenia. Have him research some of the famous auties/aspies, so he can see there truly are no limits to what he can accomplish. And most of all, tell him to pay no mind to those who doubt him. They've never known his potential, and will never know how hard it was for him.

Good luck, hope you find some answers as well.

To WrongPlanet!! !

Hi and Welcome,

Please do send him to the forums. He'll meet a lot of like minded people of all ages.

Also - consider giving him about 6 months off - too long and he won't go to college but too short and he won't get a break.

Instead of him doing college full time, suggest that he gets a job in a field that he enjoys and then decides whether to go to college part-time.

What are his special interests? - they're the key to his future.

Hello, enjoy your stay!
Would be quite awesome if your son joined.

Great to see you aboard the Wrong Planet, Liz217. Someday I hope to be seeing your son onboard as well. I think that he'll fine wonderful encouragement here on WP. I really liked the good words of both Emoal6 and gbollard. Be sure to take great care of yourself, Liz217; all the best to you and your son; and keep those posts coming.

Hello, and welcome to WP! I'm sure if he does decide to hang around here he'll find he has quite a lot in common with many of us.

Also:

Truer words were never spoken nor written.

I hope you'll be back even if he might not join. If you have any questions I might be of assistance with, send me a private message. I'm a grandmother with Asperger's Syndrome who has raised an AS son (soon to be 20 yrs. old) and a NT (neurotypical) daughter (soon to be 26 yrs. old). My daughter has repeated the same combo set of children, except they're less than 2 years apart in age. My husband is NT, so you could say my immediate family is quite the half & half bunch!

I'm a college graduate (3 different majors) and finished homeschooling with great success. I don't have any impressive career awards, but I do know I have quite a variety of experiences from life that could be helpful to moms of Aspie children. My mother was not an Aspie and had no clue how to raise me. My father may have been with AS, but they both passed away before any of us knew about Aspergers.

Thanks for all the welcomes.
My son's an incredible artist. Whether it's clay, painting, sketching, or graphics on the computer, he has his own style of art and is very detailed.
I'll send him a link to the site, and I really hope he joins.

MIT offers free online classes.

If your son went to Digipen, he would find a lot of aspies and a good job making art for video games. My oldest son who is NT makes an adequate living as a video game artist. My aspie son who went to Digipen makes a living programming at another video game company.

Welcome

I absolutely hated the K-12 public education system, mainly because the populus was comprised primarily of warlords of attention, you had no choice in any matter, & you where treated as a child. Once I got my highschool equiv. at 16 & got into college, everything changed. Suddenly I had an opinion, a voice, a vote. Your son could be the same, but no promises.

Nice to meet you, Liz217.

Welcome! (im new too)

I hated school mainly because of some damage done in the early years. If I can be of any assistance, I'd suggest the following.

Don't expect him to do great in all subjects but help him to balance his self worth on the ones he is good at.

Don't let teachers bully him. Out of all the bullies I had to deal with, it was the teachers that were the worst. Anyone else I would just knock their block off, physical or verbally depending on the threat. I don't recommend you child knocking anyone's block off, that's just how I handled it.

Encourage a life outside of school so that he has a place to go when school is bad.