Basically hate the term 'aspie'

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On that negative note...hi, I'm Anna. I was diagnosed with Asperger's when I was about 14, and I can't stand that I have it. I've tried to live as normally as possible and forget that I'm not like everybody else.
The obsession I have held for the past 8 years is skateboarding.
I just saw the movie Adam, and it brought back a lot of awful memories of my dysfunction as a teenager and young adult.
I know that Asperger's is a handicap, not a 'deviance', and I think it's stupid that anybody would think of it as anything else.
I'm very opinionated, but my opinions change with the wind. I might strongly agree with you one minute, and then ten minutes later I am fully against that opinion. My honesty never wavers, it's just that my support changes hands a lot.
I love myself. I also hate a lot of things about myself. I am a sucker for people who love me.
I avoid relationships of the romantic kind, and sexual relations repel me. This includes attempts at seduction.
I dislike people who possess qualities that are the same as the ones I hate about myself, which means I don't like red hair, outspoken people, people with Asperger's, et cetera.
Apparently, I get very sardonic and unlikeable at night.
Why am I here? I reckon it's because I have Asperger's and I wanna talk about it somewhat, since I tend to keep it a secret with the people I know in real life.
Sorry if you already don't like me...it's a process.

"I avoid relationships of the romantic kind, and sexual relations repel me. This includes attempts at seduction."

that's probably the worst thing. Romantic relationships are fun, exciting, uplifting, painful, scary, heartbreaking, and generally very interesting if you're one for studying human relations(humans are strange).

Idk what to say other than, try to have fun!

Hi Anna, welcome to the autistic redhead wing of WrongPlanet!

We've never met, so all I can do is speculate and apply my lifetime's worth of observation and analysis, accepting the risk that I'm totally wrong. As you say, you dislike certain traits in yourself, AS-related and otherwise, and seem to project that onto others sharing the traits.

My speculation is that at least part of the cause is that these traits make you noticeably different, for which you have been and maybe still are teased, bullied or even abused. And if your "differentness" universally provokes those reactions, it must be wrong.

It took me until north of 40 to even begin to break out of that way of thinking. Forums such as WP help immensely. Here you can share experiences with people who have been where you are - or are still there - and hear their perspectives. We can also hear yours. We understand here, because our lives aren't all that different. Some of us have overcome some of our problems, others still struggle.

And if my similarities to you put you off, I understand. There are many others here who will be willing to chime in.

Again, welcome to Wrong Planet!

Wow, dead on. I hadn't even thought of it that way. But that feels absolutely correct. This site is looking better and better...

Many of us, upon discovering the causes of our "differentness", go back and "recapture" past experiences, replaying them in our minds, sometimes even visiting the locations the events took place, only this time with an understanding of why we are being treated as we are. We can see that we were not the ones who were "wrong." I have found that doing this is a valuable tool in coming not only to accept ourselves, but actually like the things that make us different. It can be a long and painful process, but it is ultimately rewarding.

Once done, we never look at ourselves in the same negative way again, and don't tolerate when others do either. And when we stop tolerating being mistreated, people either stop, or we cut them out of our lives. Either way, problem solved. There are few things more formidable than a confident red-haired autistic woman!

It still will be difficult for people we are just meeting to understand us. However, we still expect that we will be treated with dignity while they do get to know us.

Oh I love that fresh new look on things. Thanks Melissa, I hadn't thought of it like that. It is hard to stay positive when now after two years another relationship has gone west because of being looked at differently and negatively.

I too am only new to this site, but I am enjoying the different perspectives we all have on similar subjects.

Welcome Anna, I also am new too. Hope you make many good friends that treat you much more positively.

If you want to see a good movie about asperger's see if you could say it in words.

Welcome to WP!

"Hi," Anna - welcome aboard the Wrong Planet.

welcome anna! i dont like the term aspie either, it sounds really childish

Wow, the more I read here the more enlightened I seem to be. I'm new to WP and realizing I have AS (my son was diagnosed a few weeks ago, so naturally I realized I've been dealing with it as many of us do)..

I just wanted to say thanks to everyone as this post and conversation helped make more sense of a few things and the fact that I can relate to it so easily helps me not feel so odd and strange as it seems there is a reason for it all!

Guys with CURLY hair freak me out. I can't stand that guy on The Mentalist. Curly hair on women doesn't bother me. Wonder what sort of imprinting caused that?

I'm not nuts about the term 'Aspie', but I'd rather throw that out into the cultural Zeitgeist than have the whole world get hung up on the phrase ASS BURGERS.

WhiteElf and Chr1s, welcome to Wrong Planet!

Hang around here long enough and you'll realise that many of us here are very much like you. We are not alone here. And once we realise that there's nothing wrong with us, and there are so many like us, we never look at the world in quite the same way again.

To Adopted, WhiteElf, and Chr1s:

To WrongPlanet!! !

Welcome! Relatively new here myself, finding it to be of value.

I am not fond of "Aspie" either, so we're on the same page in that respect.

I am also not fond of viewing AS (or much of anything else for that matter) as a handicap, so we're at odds already I'll spare you the "vigorous discussion" on that topic.

Finding this place has been like, if you'll excuse the politically incorrect analogy, being a Chinaman abroad stumbling upon Chinatown. It isn't quite home, but a heck of a lot closer than the rest of the city. Still not my tribe, but at least my people.

Hi Anna,

It seems to me that you don't hate the term so much as the condition. I'm willing to bet that you hate aspergian, aspergers, asd and all the others too.

I'm one of those annoying well-adjusted aspies who is completely at home with their condition (now) and actually enjoys many aspects of it. I can appreciate where you're coming from though and I know that things are probably difficult for you.

In my case, I didn't get a diagnosis until well after I'd handled the most difficult parts of my life. This meant that I had no label to blame my failure on (so I used to just hate myself instead).

Now that I'm older, I'm settled with myself and my differences. Maybe one day, you can reach a happy place too.