New & Scared & Stuff.

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I've been lurking this forum for a few days...finally worked up the courage to post.

Hi.

I'm about to turn 18 and finally decided to look into this Autism/Aspergers thing. A friend has been telling me she thinks I'm on the spectrum for years (she has a brother on the spectrum) but I never really listened to her.

I was diagnosed with depression and social phobia as a younger teen...but IDK, some of my traits I think are more autistic. Social phobia doesn't explain why I can't handle even my parents touching me when I'm not expecting it, and sometimes even screaming/yelping in class if someone randomly touches me. Just, lots of little things like that. Plus I took some of your ever-so-lovely autism/aspie tests (which I know don't mean anything really, but they're still interesting) and they seem to match up with what I think.

Even my mom admitted to me a few days ago "you're probably some kind of autistic, why get tested?" and I think I agree. There's nothing in it for me if I get a proper diagnosis, other than maybe some answers...but I think I already know the answers.

Bleh.

Happy Halloween.

Welcome! No need for fear or courage here--just be yourself. I hope you will find what you're looking for here. Although I must say, I fear your choice of name might prove a tad...confusing.

oh, wow.

I'm sorry.

Is there any way to change my username here?

This is my "alternative" username...whenever I'm on some website I'd rather not be associated with in real life. I never knew anyone else used it.

Sorry.

The only benefits of Dx's are that if you need help in school or a workplace that you can get it. If you are still highly functional then the Dx is just a piece of paper following you around that doesn't do much.

You sound like you have what is called Sensory Integration Disorder. It can be associated with Autism/Spectrum disorders but can also be there separately. Since psychology is just a bunch of personality traits lumped together to make a diagnosis, if you have a lot of things like social anxiety, sensory integration disorder, depression, etc. its more likely that you have one condition that can include these other issues than just separately having each of these disorders without some other commonality.

So, pretty much just research, look up coping skills and connect with other Aspies/Spectrum folks and have fun with it. Congrats, you are a quirky adult. The Dx's are only needed after High school if you have issues that require accommodation in college or a profession. Otherwise, you're just quirky...unless you have lots of money, then you get to be eccentric.

I'm not sure how I feel about being quirky.

Being an adult is scary. Being on this site is scary.

I probably sound like I'm nuts right now. But I'm not. It's just that the past few days I've been looking at all of this and I'm convinced, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that the people who know me were right. I don't want to get a diagnosis, it wouldn't be good for anything really. I function fine.

I'll probably stay away from this site for the most part, methinks. But I like being able to read everything and not being constantly reminded about logging in.

A very special Welkome to WrongPlanet, with a K.

The WP Kink

No need to apologize. I don't own the rights to the name! These things happen from time to time. I don't think there is a way to change a username, but if you plan on reading more than posting, I don't think we need to worry too much about people getting us confused.

Oh dear. Why are you scared of here? We're just pixels on a screen. Even if you offend one of us mightily, what can we do about it? Some of the meaner people might call you names. What of it?

Welcome greetings to the Wrong Planet community, kaybee92.

welcome man. Actually i have the opposite problem, i tend to post incessantly and then worry after my post for a long time that people won't like me or my post was messed up. Spectrum is a very odd thing, i had a ton of little "quirks" and issues that has held me back in life. I never in a million years would have thought i would have any illness like this. My view of aspergers and autism was also very skewed tho. You may be surprised by what you find out about yourself threw talking to people here. One thing i will say, and always do say is. Don't take 1 doctors opinion for anything, like your diagnoses, not even 2 or 3 doctors. Form your own opinion on everything in life, go to the doctor, therapist, do your research and look inside yourself and form your own opinion. You probably know the answer better then any of them. I too was diagnosed with social anxiety. In fact my diagnoses up to this point are, social anxiety, generalized anxiety, add, adhd, severe depression, anhedonia and dysthymic disorder...lol, i think i will just say i have NLD thanks. And i take my "self diagnoses" which is obviously correct as a blessing. I now know why i have such issues, and can adjust to try to compensate and change them. Having a label "disorder" does not mean you cannot change things or try to, its just a label and a way to identify some of your strengths and weaknesses. Just make sure whatever you do, if you get diagnosed don't let it dig you into a hole, you are not your diagnoses, you are a unique individual who is more alive then most others are.

I'm not scared of you guys, I'm scared that the way you guys post and say you think is actually how my brain goes. I'm scared because it makes sense...if that makes any sense?

sure does make sense , but you should not be scared, being different is a gift. My gift is my perseverance, you have to embrace the crazy. Thats the only way, listen, take all the people with any sort of mental illness and count them. How much of the worlds population do you think is messed up, ALOT, we are all different and unique, find your strengths and relish them. I bet you are empathetic as heck, and i bet you have a very strong will, anyone dealing with this stuff has a strong will, otherwise they would have jumped off the bridge a while back. You will be fine, for me this was such a relief, for 16 years i thought i was going insane, i thought i was so different and such a failure, so much so that now no matter what i do i view myself as a failure and a lazy piece of crap. The relief of finding out that i can attribute my insanity to something is indescribable. You can either take the diagnoses and curl up into a ball and cry or say "yes this is me" find out your strengths and weaknesses and work on both. We are all unique, and you have to embrace this, its not just debilitating, its special. I guaruntee, even if u have not found it yet, that you will have at least 1 interest or strength that others do not, or you have to a greater degree. exploit this, it seems to me that as, autism, nld, all these spectrum illnesses make it so that we generally don't focus on jobs that make a ton of money or any of the normal comforts that people love. We want to be happy, and we must do jobs that we love or can stand. We are people of passion, intense people that have extraordinary will and perseverance well beyond most humans giving up point. You will be who you want to be, i am confident in that, but maybe who you want to be and who you are will open up to you now that you know a bit more about yourself , as usually one of my rants, i hope i gave you something usefull and didn't just rant on and on, but hey thats me!

if you dont like or feel you need medication though, i would avoid going to doctors about it. Being labeled is not necessarily good and you can run into problems. I bet with driving and thing's of the such, my personal opinion tho, and thats it.

I remember watching a film of autistic children and realizing that indeed my daughter WAS severely autistic! Oh, how I cried. I've gotten over it and the long voyage has taught me so much. Finding out that she got her autism from me and not from the blue was another shock. But it's been a relief to find out that all the things I thought were faults were part of a syndrome, one that I could work with, one that explained so much, one that I could use to talk to people about how to interact with me successfully for both sides.