Hi! I'm new :)

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I'm at the moment indifferent in how I feel about opening up to strangers about what's going on inside of my mind. Maybe indifferent isn't the right word -- apprehensive fits better. 5 years ago my doctor referred me to a psychiatrist for possible Asperger's Syndrome. At the time I had no idea what my doctor was talking about, so when I went to the psychiatrist I just started rambling on nervously about my depression, social fear and inability to function as a human being. I literally thought I was going crazy - I couldn't even imagine what it was like to be someone else, let alone think about the universe as a whole without freaking out and having a mental fit. I never mentioned to the doctor about the Asperger's and he never asked. He told me I had Social Anxiety disorder, ADD, Major Depressive Disorder, OCD and Bipolar Disorder. I tried their medications, they didn't work, I decided forget it.

Here I am 5 years later, and it is only recently that I remembered my doctor referring me regarding a possible diagnosis that I disregarded as something I didn't understand. I literally forgot, so I looked up what Asperger's was a few weeks ago and it all fits. I remember being 6-16 and "rocking" on a couch with headphones blasting music in my ears. I don't know why, but it soothed me. My dad always scolded me for having a "bad" look on my face - so I would spend time actually practicing in the mirror how to look normal when people looked at me, however I had no idea what normal was. Truthfully, this brings me to the undeniable conclusion that my view of the world has been askew -- maybe I am the strange one after all, why I never looked at it that way before now is beyond me.

Also why I'm here:

Due to my unreasonable fits with unintelligible communication, I have decided to seek a diagnosis and hopefully not blame the world (specifically my parents) n the process. So, I'd like to find some understanding and learn something in the process.

Sorry for the long-winded hello, I don't know how to do a short-cut.

On a brighter side, I love to laugh, have a true love for photography and being an overall dork.

Welcome to WP

Here you will find people from all walks of autistic life, and various experiences regarding diagnosis, living with autism and much more.

We hope you enjoy the company.

Hi Pink Mascarade,

Thanks for your interesting message - it wasn't a ramble it explains a lot. I'm very new to wrongplanet myself - please excuse me if Ive got this wrong - but maybe like me you are female - and we tend to be ignored or given other diagnoses instead of getting screened for /as etc...

I wish you all the best , I find wrong planet overwhelming a times, but the posters seem like a friendly and informed bunch mostly,


shy shubunkin

Welcome, both of you. Most of us are friendly, so don't be afraid to open up.

Welcome to Wrong Planet!

I am female and I think you're right -- from what I have read, they expect it and/or find it more in males than females so it would make sense that they would overlook, or not look into it in females. It's not really fair in my opinion because it's something that probably could have been remedied in my childhood, but I am looking towards the positives in this and will work through it. Maybe I should look at it as a blessing in disguise?

I too find mostly any forum overwhelming and that's pretty much why I ramble on because I'm afraid of what to really say on the interwebs lol. It's nice to meet you

Last edited by pinkmascarade on 14 Nov 2011, 9:19 am, edited 1 time in total.

thank you! that means a lot

thank you everyone for the welcomes I'll take it slow and see how this goes.

Welcome!

Thanks for all the welcomes and nice to meet you all too ! !

Pinkmascarade - I'm hoping to get assessed soon - my GP apparently has agreed to it and referred me to a psych - so that is encouraging. Like you I'm into photography - all sorts of crafts and arts - at moment I'm taking a printmaking class and studying psychology part -time ...

I am now wondering how I'm going to react if I get told I'm not aspie?

All best,

a less shy shubunkin !

To WrongPlanet!! !

Welkome to WP!

Mick

sorry it sometimes takes me a while to respond hmm.. I'm not sure. I've always run away from diagnosis' for the most part and have lived a life in great denial, however I think that it is more how you feel about yourself rather than what someone else thinks that matters. I can really see it from both sides, because personally I would prefer to not have a diagnosis, but then again would be utterly confused to not have a reason to my own personal mayhem if that makes any sense. I hope all turns out okay for you.

The Big D welcomes you to Wrong Planet! Enjoy your stay!

thank you! I'm trying to get used to it, I guess maybe logging in more would help.