Hi, I'm Donatus

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Bisbane based, family of five children and still married after 18 years. All this, and I score at the extreme end on asperger diagnostics, go figure. My wife is a saint.

Very interested in anyone who is working on long term relational issues. Over my marriage's timespan, we've obviously identified and worked out all the day to day problems in order to make it this far, but the accumulated pressures inherent to AS still work their voodoo on our mojo folks.

Anyway, glad to make it here and looking forward to swapping notes and ideas.

-D

Welcome to WP!

Tim

Hi, welcome to WP.

I am currently in a relationship. The longest I had was 2 years - but he treated me pretty badly.

I've had problems with abusive relationships - people seem to think that as I have AS and some learning difficulty issues, I don't deserve to be treated in a considerate manner.

It is getting to the point where I am thinking of giving up on relationships.

My thinking about relationships is that as long as you remain open to them in your life, then you are just the same as eveyone else. Only by closing ourselves off from forming relationships do we start to become different from others.

That said, it sure is an up hill climb. My only consolation is that I know plenty of NT friends who are just the same like this.

--D

what about if i had never been in a relationship? should i vote 'under 3 years'? (i am 28-year-old.)

welcome to WP, though

Welcome to WrongPlanet

You should have had an option for under 4 months which was a record for me as I really really liked the Girl, normally two weeks, they by then Love me, I cant wait to return to solitude.
At the moment Iam waiting for councilling for Reactive Attachment Disorder, but now Ive discovered AS, I will have to see if thats the cause else the RAD treatment will be a waste of time.
KNowing my luck though, I ve probably got both!

Iam now at the age where I dont find women even close to my age attractive so guess its all prettty irilivant anyway and Ive missed the boat.

Welcome to Wrong Planet!

Adding a poll to one's introductory thread can get people's attention when otherwise they might not notice it (just because there are so many 'I'm new' posts).
Voted "under 12 yrs.": my ex-husband & I were together for 9 yrs. (married for half of that time). Current relationship has been ongoing for almost 3 yrs. (approx. since I got dx'd AS) and my boyfriend is NT. Each day is 'long term relational issues' between us (no kids, one cat).
Dunno' how similar situations & interactions are between pair comprised of 'AS female & NT male' compared with 'AS male & NT female' couple ?

I'd be interested in finding out more about this too. I'm going to buy Tony Attwoods 'Complete guide' and hopefully have a good read over the next few days. From talking to other people aswell, we are thinking of looking for a couples support group in our area and I have to say that one of the things I'm looking forward to seeing is how an AS/NT couple who are the opposite of ourselves relate to each other.

My reason is becuase I'd expect that any similarities would begin to stand out like a sort thumb with the genders reversed, and sometimes we can see ourselves in a new perspective through other people.

Thanks for saying hi. Pleased to meet you too!

--D