Torn between two worlds: New and undiagnosed

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noli_me_tangere
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28 Jul 2009, 5:45 pm

Hello to whomever reads this,

As is indicated in the title I am new to this site and ironically feel out of place because I believe I have some form of autism but am undiagnosed. I am 24 and only now am beginning the process of seeking a diagnosis.

The question remains: is there a place for me on this forum? I am not quite sure how to approach the site considering I am undiagnosed.


This is the first real attempt to speak to out, apart from a few friends a psychologist, and have no support from family members. My family responded extremely hostile to the suggestion claiming that "I think too much," "I need to be less analytical and more emotional," and (this is my favourite line) "If you started living like a normal person you wouldnt have the social anxiety." My mother thinks I should be able to help myself, and I have found ways to cope as best as I can, but I've hit a wall and cannot seem to progress any further. I have done all that I can do, I've developed a social role, I've taught myself to anaylze social interactions to an extent, and I have found ways to cope (for the majority of times) during stressful situations. But the anxiety never leaves, and the breakdowns are out of my control. I do my best to mask my problems but have recently confessed to my mother and a few others the great effort it takes me to try to join the world. At best I can only observe, and when forced to interact it seems like I have to be running at full capacity (in other words I have to be turned on, alert, extremely aware, whatever you want to refer to it as).

I joined this site with the hope that it will help alleviate the alienation I have had to live with since childhood. Thus, I welcome all feedback, questions, and anyone who would like to help objectively analyze my situation/me.


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richie
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28 Jul 2009, 5:56 pm

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28 Jul 2009, 6:05 pm

Welcome! I think you will find this forum very educational. :)



noli_me_tangere
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28 Jul 2009, 6:06 pm

Thank you I hope so!


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noli_me_tangere
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28 Jul 2009, 6:12 pm

Thank you I hope so!


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southwestforests
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28 Jul 2009, 6:37 pm

noli_me_tangere wrote:
The question remains: is there a place for me on this forum?

Short answer :arrow: yes.

Long answer :arrow: everywhere you want to go!


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28 Jul 2009, 6:40 pm

Welcome to WP. There is definitely a place for you here. Just start browsing and you'll find many stories similar to yours. Diagnosis and family are a complex, volatile mixture with unpredictable results. My mother, for instance, continues with a litany similar to yours, though I am over 40 and quite diagnosed, though probably not as high-functioning as you seem to be.

Good luck with the diagnosis and happy browsing here.

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28 Jul 2009, 6:47 pm

Hello, I'm similar to you in that I'm undiagnosed. I still read and post away. Lots of people here are undiagnosed for a variety of reasons. You'll probably find lots of people here with situations while not exactly like yours similar enough that they can be of help, or at least sympathetic. You won't find all your answers here, but you'll find some.



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28 Jul 2009, 7:05 pm

One reason to be undiagnosed is to be underemployed and uninsured. I get services at a non profit mental health facility in my town and I am lucky to have it. I pay on a sliding scale. The new psychiatrist there quite honestly told me she didn't feel qualified to make a diagnosis.



Seanmw
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28 Jul 2009, 7:13 pm

welcome to to the ironically wonderful world of WrongPlanet. We're all just like you. It's almost a sense of returning "home." Like finding out you belong to a reclusive sub-race you never knew existed because the condition is in fact undeniably genetic. there's too many cases of multiple cases in families for it to be mere coincidence or random affliction.


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28 Jul 2009, 7:33 pm

For me it's like I've been in a foreign country for a long time and haven't heard my native tongue spoken in a long long time and then suddenly coming upon someone who speaks your language.



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28 Jul 2009, 7:34 pm

that was grammatically embarrasing :oops:



Tim_Tex
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28 Jul 2009, 7:35 pm

Welcome to WP!


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28 Jul 2009, 7:35 pm

plus I miss typed embarrassing



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28 Jul 2009, 9:11 pm

Welcome aboard the Wrong Planet, fellow-traveler noli_me_tangere. I think you'll find lots of good information and support here on WP. Here's wishing you all the very best.


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noli_me_tangere
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28 Jul 2009, 10:20 pm

RingRider wrote:
Hello, I'm similar to you in that I'm undiagnosed. I still read and post away. Lots of people here are undiagnosed for a variety of reasons. You'll probably find lots of people here with situations while not exactly like yours similar enough that they can be of help, or at least sympathetic. You won't find all your answers here, but you'll find some.



Unfortunately the reason I have been undiagnosed are two-fold. My parents never thought of getting me tested simply because they didn't know what it was, and assumed that I was shy and still make excuses such as "intelligent people tend not to be social" etc. The second reason is that I am limited in funds. As a student without a job I cannot afford an evaluation and will have to wait a few more years (once I am done school) before I can really begin the process again. All I have been able to get is a brain scan that only indicated that I have a deficiency in alpha waves and in the region controlling motor skills. Its odd but it was only when I was told to sit still that I realized I cannot. I nearly had a panic attack because I wanted to move (and apparently, despite all efforts on my part, I was still told to relax the jaw, stop grinding my teeth and stop moving my legs). But my therapist wasn't very good, he just agitated me and I got very frustrated in his presence.


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