LynnCW wrote:
I have not been diagnosed with any form of autism (never been to psychologist), told I have OCD by regular DR.
Ever since I was little I have felt, different, to say the least. I didn't really have many, if any friends when I was younger, and I remember having lots of panic attacks. I would smell something strange and start freaking out. Certain sounds drive me nuts, I have to start scratching my arms or my ears to deal with it. I used to always call my mom to pick me up from school because I felt out of it, like I was watching everything on TV. I still can't stand being around balloons or fireworks. I have trichotilomania to the point where I am missing half of my eyebrows and lashes. When I am not pulling them, I am rubbing them. I daydream far more than I think I should, where when anything inturrupts, I get really irritated. I took the Aspie quiz with 117/200. I am a lot more social now, than when I was a kid, partly because of alcohol... I have read a few posts here before registering, and to be honest, I feel A LOT better after reading some of your posts. The first thoughts that came to mind, I am NOT the only one who does certain things. I think one of my biggest things that makes me wonder, is my obsessions. When I get interested in something, I know what I will be 1000% focused on for a while. I have had obsessions with medical information, animal facts when I was little, I went through a phase where all I would read about is psychic phenomena. Hope I am welcome here. Sorry if
I've been diagnosed with autism since a young age (high functioning autism) - I also have ADHD and, like you, OCD. My OCD manifests mostly in compulsive movements, but I've also had things (more when I was a kid than now) like yours, where I'd "smell something strange and start freaking out", or freaking out at all sorts of other things like that. I also have to do a lot of things in repetition numbers, either 3 or 7 (including all numbers divisible by 3 or 7), even sometimes in sets of 3 or 7 (like 3 sets of 3 or 7 sets of 3 or 7 of 7 etc.)
For the compulsive movements and repetition stuff, I do them because I feel like if I don't do them, something really bad (I don't know what exactly) is going to happen, or everything I do will go wrong, even though I know that is completely illogical. I know bad things don't happen because I do these compulsive things, but I feel like I have to do them anyway. They've decreased in number of different compulsions and in frequency over the years - although that's mainly because I still do many of them, just have managed to make myself do some versions that aren't very visible.
I know that feeling of it being like I'm watching everything on TV as well.
I'm glad to read posts I identify with a lot. It's also good to see more people with OCD posting here. Even if you don't have some form of autism you're welcome to post here - there are plenty of people here who do not know if they have it.