I´m new and I´m getting my ASD assessment tomorrow. HELP! :)

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Hello, I am new here, I just wanted to introduce myself a little bit before I start posting all over the forums.

I am a cis female, I am 38 years old I live in England although I am Spanish by origin, and I was (mis)diagnosed with borderline personality disorder at age 26. I also suffer form eating disorders since I was around 9 or 10 years old as well as anxiety and depression.

Earlier this year I was remembering things from my childhood and some images came to mind of an office with a doctor and he was making me do some things like drawings, and playing with blocks and talking to him. I called my mom and I said, hey, I just remembered this, is this something that really happened or is this not a real memory?
She told me that yes my parents had taken me to a child psychologist at around my 8 years of age as I was having issues making friend at school (HUGE understatement, I was really very badly bullied, physical and mentally) and I also was having "anger issues" with my father (not with my mom apparently) and that the doctor had mentioned that I might be autistic. But my mother being herself a doctor and thinking she knows best (she didn´t know about my eating disorder until I told her at 26 years old and never new about the bullying ) she disagreed with him and took me away and never pursued the issue further and just told me "we thought it was BS, you were just a shy kid with a not great relationship with dad".

I was like... you are kidding me... you know i have suffered with social interactions ALL MY LIFE, that I have an ED, now you know I was bullied, and you never cared to mention this?!?!?!

She answered well you have your diagnosis you are BPD right? HUGE facepalm.

My symptoms only matched the BPD for about a year while I was doing drugs massively. When she mentioned the autism and all that I started researching into ASD especially into Aspergers and I wanted to cry of how relieved I felt. I meet every single damn criteria for Aspergers.

So I went to my GP and asked to be referred and when she told me she was happy to refer me but that funding in my area was nonexistent and that waiting lists in London were close to two years I decided to do a bit of research and I am getting a private ASD assessment done tomorrow somewhere in the UK (I am not sure if we are allowed to mention clinics?). Anyway, the doctor that is assessing me is a consultant and only does adult ADHD and ASD assessments. I am extremely anxious and I would like to know what to expect. I know that he uses the DSM 5 and he has asked me to fill in before hand the AQ, EQ, a patients questionnaire and a relatives questionnaire (my parents at first refused but then they filled it in). As an informant I am bringing my husband. My parents are back in Spain an anyway they said they would refuse to attend regardless.

What should i expect, knowing he uses the DSM 5, to be asked tomorrow. What will my husband be asked?

If clinics can be mentioned I would like to share which one it is just in case someone has experience there.

Thanks!

Welcome to Wrong Planet!

I'm on one of the NHS waiting lists. Don't panic or worry. From what others say everything is fine. Relax.

It's a little late to be giving you this advice, given that you might not have time for it on such short notice, but I would strongly suggest making an organized list of all your reasons for suspecting autism. I would organize the list by categories such as "social issues," "sensory issues," "attention issues," "other executive functioning issues," etc. Having this list with you at the initial interview will help you avoid having your mind go blank in response to questions.

I had that prepared thanks! Interview is in some hours. I’ll post you all later

Good luck!

I'd agree with Mona. You can prepare by writing a list of the things that you think are relevant to your reasons for wanting the assessment. This will make it less stressful, and keep you from forgetting things.

I'd suggest you first write down a list of all the things you think are important for them to know. Just write down everything that's bouncing been around in your mind. Then once its all on paper, then see if you can group them into categories.

-eg; forgetting things, loosing things, being late might go under "being disorganised".

- Having trouble making or keeping friends, difficulty with small talk would go under "social trouble".

-Being shy, imitating things that more socially skilled people do would go under "masking/ camouflage strategies" (things you do to hide your social difficulties and appear normal)

It's not important what goes in what category. The list is for YOU, not the assessor. The purpose of the list is for you to have things a bit sorted in your mind and make it easier for you to tell your story.

The assessor with probably ask a lot of questions. They might get you to fill out questions on paper. They will likely ask a lot of things about your development (how things were in childhood and teen years). Answer them honestly. When they are finished, look at your list and request that you tell them the things on your list that weren't covered. This way, you won’t forget to tell them anything important.

The assessment may take more than one appointment. It's okay it you feel nervous, the assessor will expect this. This is a situation when "being yourself" (not trying to appear normal) is desirable.

I hope it goes well.

I have worked out what this thing on my tablet called "Memo" does. I have copied some things I have written down on this site into the memo compartment. Now I will need to get the pen and paper out to write it down ready to be assessed. It is the only way I can think of as if I try to purposly write down straight off from my own mind I would eithef not vover much or I would probably not do it. I was thinking about writing a model railway book but I have started it a few times... But how to get photos off my tablet and o to paper. I could get my old camera going and photograph the screen, develop the photo and then I can stick it into my book.
These modern gadgets are complicated arn't they!

Anyway. I do need to write what I have put on my memo onto paper.

Does memo stand for memory? It is a great idea whoever thought of it.

I got my diagnosis!! !! !! The doctors said it will take 10 to 15 days to get the formal paperwork but he said he was so sure he cut the assessment from 3 to 2 hours and a half. He will send me links to places to go for support and therapy if I want to. I feel so relieved!! !! !! !! !!

Nice. Was the assessment easy to do?

i had answered the AQ and EQ and other questionnaires from the comfort of my home. The assessment was a semistructured interview with me and my husband and to be honest it was hard i was very anxious stimming like crazy but i think it went well considering.

When you fill questionnaires and can seem to pick an answer because for example, it seems paradoxical, ask for clarifications, because you're probably taking the question literally. Try to make the difference between the person and the character you wear.

Thanks for the advise I have already been assessed and diagnosed though

I no longer stim much. When I do it is hidden stims. Things people wouldn't notice. Like moving my knees back and fore. I found myself doing it today while waiting in a queue at the chip shop.

Now something I have realized very recently. Why I stim. I never ever knew why as it had never occurred to me. I never knew it was stimming. I knew I used to bounce my legs up and down. Usually I would be told off for the things I did which were classed as stimming so I had to teach myself not to.

I have realized through first researching youtube and now this site, that purpousful stimming is for stress relief and automatic stimming I used to concentrate on something... For example, when I was at school. It could be half for stress relief at the same time!
If you told me back then what it was and why I would have been ever so embarissed, and I would not have believed you as I would never have thought I may have had asperges traits. I was a very self concious and shy person who would form a mask so I would not be seen as different.

Now, a few months ago I would have said I don't stim, as I never realized it can take more forms then the rocking back and fore and the quite visual shaking of ones hands.

Now yesterday I had a time where I was feeling overwealmed while at home and I could feel a possible shutdown coming, so I went upstairs to lie down on my bed to relax though I was still stressed. I decided to try stimming while I had the energy to do it (As the partial shutdowns I get rob me of my energy). I started shaking my legs... Not a lot of differwnce. Slight, but not really enough to notice or to reward me with enough difference compared to the energy I put in. But when I shook my arms quickly, I suddenly felt my arms getting warm and also, my whole body started to peak itself up. Not only that, I was able to get up off my bed and I totally avoided a partial shutdown. It worked amazingly well! I never knew that it was possible to do that and totally avoid a partial shutdown altogether!
The problem is though, most of the time, unless I have already foud a quiet place to lie down when I first felt the feeling of a partial shutdown coming on, so I could have a chance to think about it, I am in no mood to remember to try to stim. I automatically try to lie still. Also, if I do get a partial shutdown in that I have gone into having one and not just on the fringes of having one, I doubt I would be able to shake my arms violently which is what is needed to avoid the shutdown, as my body goes quite limp! I am almost like a lump of jelly or a sack of potatoes.Lift my arm and let go and it will fall to the floor. I won't have the strength to slow my arm down when I go into limp mode!

I'm glad the assessment went well. I'd say congratulations, buts that sounds a bit odd to congratulate you on something that has caused a lot of suffering and misunderstanding. Now you know "officially" what you suspected for a while.

I was diagnosed ASD at 47 in April 2019 and I had no idea I was on the spectrum until the doctor said so and then the doctor had to convince me. But I'm glad they did. It has brought a lot of understanding It has made a lot of difference to me to know I'm different and OK as I am and not just a freak or a "spaz" as I was called at school.

I hope it starts a journey towards some understanding and acceptance.

I was taught never discuss mental health issues with a doctor. Never mention it etc... The reason for this is that in Britain, in the past they would lock people away who actually had very minor conditions. I know a family friend who had been locked away for a short while when he became a Christian. There was such a change in his life... His wife and father in law couldn't understand it and called the athorities who took him off... During his time there he said he met with some of the most brilliant minded and intelligent people who ad simply had a mental breakdown... They had been solicitors or bank managers etc. After a perion of a month or three, they found nothing wrong with him and he was released with a certificate declaring him to be completely sane. He says "How many people do you know have a certificate like that?"

So for me to have actually asked one of my Doctors for an assessment is a giant leap.