The Dino-Aspie Ex-Café (for Those 40+... or feeling creaky)

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cosmiccat
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29 Mar 2008, 8:13 pm

Mescalero wrote:

I havn't upset anyone here have I? I pop in and post youtube music now and then, butn it's not in my heart to be nasty

I don't believe you have upset anyone here, Mescalero. Not that I'm aware of. I can only speak for myself, of course, but I'm always glad to see you pop in and share your music with us and I feel pretty certain that the other cafe regulars feel the same. Stop in more often.

DeaconBlues
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29 Mar 2008, 9:12 pm

Mescalero wrote:

that's good to know DeaconBlue. By the way I Seen Deacon Blue at the Glasgow Art Scchool, terrific gig, round about, mid 1980s?

You mean Steely Dan? 'Cause this is where I stole my handle from...
[youtube]http://youtube.com/watch?v=inz9Sa_CVFs[/youtube]

As opposed to my "status", which I stole from here...
[youtube]http://youtube.com/watch?v=AslDzpaCURs[/youtube]

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morning_after
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29 Mar 2008, 9:51 pm

cosmiccat wrote:

SleepyDragon wrote:

When I'm having one of those "miss" days — misbegotten, misunderstood, misanthropic, etc. — nothing is more appealing than the idea of retreat to some snow-locked cave high in the Himalayas, or maybe the hushed, leafy surrounds of some remote forest monastery. Then I snap back to reality ("Mum! I can't find any clean school shirts!"), and I pop a couple more headache tablets, and soldier on.

And to answer your question, morning_after? Yes, it gives me the irrits something ferocious when too many people are talking at once, and the TV is up loud, and the sound from someone's Metroid game is groaning away in the background, and... yeah.

Yes, SleepDragon, there is nothing that pulls you back to reality as quickly as responsibilities to those who need us. I agree. Sometimes I just find myself whining, and then later, I say to myself, look around you idiot, count your blessings, there is so much suffering and anguish going on all over the world, how dare you grumble and whine over what amounts, in reality, to nothing.

And, Morning_after, I have to escape to somewhere when I'm surrounded by all those voices coming from all directions, TV, video games, and topped off by the high-pitched constant chirping of two parakeets, that rises above all the other noise like the final insult to my ears and nervous system. I think I've got to get an ipod and keep it plugged into some music that I really loved. I must do that. Maybe that would work for you as well.

Well, you can't do that at work. At least I can't

btw, I found out that one of my other coworkers is having a problem with the same person for being treated in a similar way.

I suspect she's been told to just go behind a closed door when she wants a private discussion.

morning_after
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29 Mar 2008, 9:52 pm

sartresue wrote:

Too much tune-up topic

I have learned over the years to try to focus on something else when I hear this crap, because it got me into trouble when I asked a co-worker what another co-worker was talking about, because i did not understand it. Then I am accused of gossiping. NTs can be a cruel bunch. I am glad I can be employed where I can work alone.

I didn't. I just told her that I didn't want to hear it.

morning_after
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29 Mar 2008, 9:56 pm

krex wrote:

I was just in the shower obsessing about one of my obsessions....do I have aspergers?(I love shower think time,even though I hate showers)...

I was thinking that it was "odd" ie doesn't fit the stereotype of Aspergers,that I love to read fiction and have always been interested in people...just not in "real life" much.

Thought maybe I could get some input from others on my thinking.

Onc apon a time I loved nothing but rocks and bugs.Then I learned to read. I did like to read the dictionary and "sciency" things but I also liked fiction alot.I liked books that had people in different times and countries(still do)People that were "odd" and I could relate to.As I got older (and stopped drinking)socializing became a matter of....am I likely to meet any one with the humor and interest that the people in my books have. The oddest were against it. The only real reason I ever went to social venues was to look at guys and hope that one would fall in love and come home with me. After I got sober,the odds of that happening became almost nil as well.

So I was wondering....are people like bugs and rocks to me.I look at rocks because they strike a cord of beauty in me...like guys. I want to take them apart and see how they work...like bugs. I observe but are they "real" to me.Even thinking this makes me feel "inhuman" but I just thought I would see if others ever thought like this?Am I being clear?Not sure if I'm explaining it right.

I think you're clear, and it's not inhuman.

I think all people are beautiful, but we cxan only truly understand that beauty as we try to understand them. I also think for an Aspie that means studying them a bit

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morning_after
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29 Mar 2008, 10:00 pm

hartzofspace wrote:

I sometimes wonder if it is possible for me, as an Aspie to make and keep a friend. Reading through Krex and Cosmiccat's posts, I feel relief that you have put into words how I feel about people. Like when out walking, perhaps I will admire a passing stranger's outfit, (silently.) And then, when this person speaks, engaging in the social rites of nodding a greeting, or even speaking, it's as if a mannequin came to life, startling me. I am drawn into friendships because aspects of that person appeal to me (eye candy). And I put them under my microscope, studying them, storing away info for my NT database. And then, I get bored. Its' a shame. Or, the NT in question decides I am just too weird to tolerate any longer, and they dump me, with no warning or explanation. Now I have gotten used to it, but can't help but think that it would be nice to actually get past this "honeymoon phase" in friendships.

And what Krex said about people being able to fake expressions was right on the button. This only adds to the confusion, where if you successfully interpret a given expression, you then have to determine if it's real. One of my favorite authors, Anne Perry, is excellent at describing expressions, as the suspect is being questioned by the police. Also, most of her stories are set in Victorian England, which is one of my obsessions.

Hartz, if you and I ever met, I would have to do the opposite. I would love you to death if I felt accepted by you.

morning_after
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29 Mar 2008, 10:03 pm

nannarob wrote:

If both people gain more than they lose, that's fair enough, but when the other party just disappears, it's a bit hard to tell how they feel about it, and whether it would be kinder to the next nice person you meet to stay away from them. That sort of consideration makes this cartoon extra funny to me. (Gromit)

I have faith in nice people. The problem is that they do not see the real you and you have trouble communicating who you really are. Could a piece of writing help?

It is so sad that your insights and decency are lost to others because of miscommunication. You miss out on genuine friendships and they miss out just as much and don't know it.

I try to correct that, through talking to them, but sometimes that woks and sometimes it doesn't.

We need everything spelled out for us to understand NTs, but NTs also need everything spelled out to understand us.

morning_after
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29 Mar 2008, 10:06 pm

nannarob wrote:

Is Dilbert aspie? Maybe your fiction character could be like him?

Write a story as seen through the eyes of the protagonist... the world through your eyes.

That's what I was going to suggest.

I used to take classes in vreative writing and one thing I learned is to write what I know.

morning_after
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29 Mar 2008, 10:07 pm

Mescalero wrote:

I havn't upset anyone here have I? I pop in and post youtube music now and then, butn it's not in my heart to be nasty

*gives Mescalero a hug and a kiss*

sartresue
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30 Mar 2008, 10:26 am

nannarob wrote:

Is Dilbert aspie? Maybe your fiction character could be like him?

Write a story as seen through the eyes of the protagonist... the world through your eyes.

Through your eyes only topic

that is exactly what I do, nannarob. Maybe Sartresue is Mary Sue! :roll:

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lemon
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30 Mar 2008, 1:18 pm

Mescalero wrote:

I havn't upset anyone here have I? I pop in and post youtube music now and then, butn it's not in my heart to be nasty

not a problem, maybe you could mention the title and artist as well,
cause i almost never click links when i don't know what i'll see

Gromit
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30 Mar 2008, 2:19 pm

hartzofspace wrote:

:lol:

Thanks for the Dilbert cartoons! They explain it all so perfectly!

There's another one I like. It's too old to be still in the archive on the Dilbert site, but the dialogue is the important thing, and I can give you that. Dilbert is on a date.
Date: "Do you have any hobbies?"
Dilbert: "I like to read obscure articles on the internet and imagine having friends who are interested in the same things."
Date:

"But you do have friends, right?"
Dilbert: "Is it too late to change the subject?"

Last edited by Gromit on 01 Apr 2008, 2:08 pm, edited 1 time in total.

blessedmom
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30 Mar 2008, 2:32 pm

Enjoying a lazy Sunday afternoon and daydreaming of warm, summer days, sipping lemonade and dancing on the front porch in the breeze (which I have never done but wish I had).

Unforgettable

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=53ith7bNN8w[/youtube]

sartresue
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30 Mar 2008, 3:47 pm

Nat King Cole-ectibles topic

Father and daughter sounded as if they recorded this together--unforgettable!

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hartzofspace
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30 Mar 2008, 7:12 pm

Gromit wrote:

"But you do have friends, right?"
Dilbert: "Is it too late to change the subject?"

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reika
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30 Mar 2008, 8:12 pm

reading and lurking

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