Thank you everyone for your responses. I am still learning about Aspergers myself since my son has only been diagnosed for a year. I just worry and don't want to do the wrong thing or not do something that would be helpful. I quit pressuring him about joining something but thought I might just take him to a boy scout meeting or something sometime just so he can check it out. I will let him come around on his own. He seems perfectly happy most of the time being alone. We try to do at least an hour a day of what he calls "mommy" time. During that time I am his friend. We play video games, board games, watch TV or read. I think he is lonely sometimes and I am all he has to talk to. He knows that he has aspergers, but I don't think he fully understands it. I have some books that I am reading and will eventually go over some more things with him. I notice that he is more concerned about friends actually when he is in school. I guess because he sees everyone else hanging out with kids and he wants to be a part of it.
To Carolinawonders,
I can't say if your son does or doesn't have Aspergers, but I can tell you what I noticed with my son. From the time he was born he was a fussy child. We thought it was colic as a baby, but now we are wondering if it was due to the digestive problems aspergers children tend to have. He never liked to be wet. He always wanted soft things. I use to think he would over exaggerate when he would get a little scratch or bump because he would scream and cry like some stabbed him. I now know that Aspergers children/adults sometimes have heightened senses. It can be all, one, or a combination. Loud noises don't seem to bother my son or bright lights but leave a tag in a shirt or put a pair of stiff jeans on him and he as a fit. His sense of touch is heighted so things touching him need to be soft or they irritate him. When he gets scratched or bruised it hurts him more than it would me or you. I always knew there was something different about my son, but never knew what it was. I had never heard of Aspergers. I knew about Autism and the symptoms weren't there. I could never take him to birthday parties and drop him off. I was always worried he would get frustrated and have a meltdown. He always had the most problems in school during gym, lunch and recess. I now understand that it could be due to sensory overload. He has always had problems with writing. He wasn't imaginative enough to write a story. I later found out from helping him with an assignment that he didn't want to write this one thing because it wasn't true. He didn't know how to make up things. He doesn't lie and is very rule based. He takes everything you say to him literally. For example he stubbed his toe and was hopping around saying ow. I asked him "what did you do". Meaning what happened and he said "why do you always think I did something." That is just one example that stuck in my head. In second grade is when it started to seem worse. He would hide under desks and get really angry or frustrated at school and then just shut down. I was told he was being defiante and wouldn't do his work. I started researching and thought he had an auditory processing disorder. He seemed to have problems with verbal instructions and what not. He would get behind and then not know what to do and then get frustrated and just quit. I asked the school for instructional support (written instructions) and was told he didn't test that way. They observed him and basically said he had anger management issues. Also, in a round about way I was told that my parenting skills is why he was the way he was. So, not knowing any better I believed them. I really cracked down on him and it didn't make it better it made it worse. Finally, I was pushed in the right direction. He was referred to a psychologist who tested him. Now this wasn't until he was almost done with fifth grade. The concern was he wasn't ready to go to middle school. He was tested and diagnosed with Aspergers, ADHD, Severe Anxiety, and get this Auditory Processing Disorder. Now he is on medicatoin to help with the anxiety and ADHD. He has an IEP in school to help with some of his other issues. He will be getting written instructions and/or a notetaker to help him with processing verbal information. I still want to go back to the administrators, instructional support staff, and school psychologists who basically brushed me off in second grade and inform them of his diagnosis. I feel he was labeled a "bad" and "defiante" kid and that was that. He now hates school due to all the struggles he has had. I am hoping with all the help things will get better. We had a rocky start in 6th grade but it got better. He has since had a neuropsych test done which is going to allow him some additional helpful tools next year.
There are all kinds of little signs and syptoms you just need to be able to put them all together. Another thing with my son is his food catch touch on his plate and he eats each different item with a different utensil. I don't know if that is an aspergers thiing or an OCD thing I would suggest taking your son to a psychologist and express your concerns. It could be Aspergers, it could be the change in parental status, or hormones. The psychologist will know the right questions and tests to do to determine that. Either way it is best to find out so no matter what it is you can get the right help. I wished I would have known or thought to take my son to a psychologist sooner. I thought by addressing the school they are suppose to be the experts on that sort of thing, would lead me in the right direction. Unfortunately for my son I was wrong.
Good Luck and I hope you get the answers you are looking for.
Kelly
09 Aug 2011, 5:13 pm
