BrianLocke wrote:
underwater wrote:
Cheers on the diagnosis! It feels good to have a starting point, doesn't it?
There can be a lot of feelings bouncing around when you reevaluate your life experiences in the light of an autism diagnosis. Just try to be patient with yourself and hang in there.
I am happy for you, a correct diagnosis leads to a lot better life strategies.
Thanks. Yes it does feel good to know why I am the way I am. it takes a lot of guilt off my shoulders and lets me stop blaming myself for not being able to do what I thought I should be able to do. I always felt like a failure because I couldn't do the things most "normal" people could. I was constantly told that I was just lazy and not trying hard enough.
Meanwhile I felt like I was trying as hard as I could, but when I hit my limits, I just shut down and everything fell apart and I blamed myself because I thought I should have been able to handle it. That sent me into a spiral of guilt and depression. Now I see that I was actually able to accomplish so much just from sheer force of will to overcome my limitations.
The biggest thing is now I am able to start dealing with the massive guilt that has paralyzed me for so long.
Yes. The guilt was the heaviest burden. And all the people actually managing to sabotage me in an attempt to help me. With the authority of a diagnosis behind me, I'm able to work with people to find solutions that are realistic, and my closest friends and family are more patient with me.
Just be prepared for some people writing you off because they see only the weaknesses, not the strengths. Just stick with the good ones and keep moving forward.
_________________
I sometimes leave conversations and return after a long time. I am sorry about it, but I need a lot of time to think about it when I am not sure how I feel.
21 Jun 2018, 10:17 am
