The Dino-Aspie Ex-Café (for Those 40+... or feeling creaky)

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That's really funny, CC! Sometimes I get paranoid that people are going to poison me. Later in therapy, I discovered that my insane grandmother did slip odd things into my food when I wasn't looking...

Odd things like what did she slip into your food, Hartz? I also have that type of paranoia about being poisoned. But I recently read a great book about a boy with AS who thought his father was going to kill him and so always kept his swiss army knife in his pocket with the saw blade opened to cut off the fingers of anyone who might try to harm him. The boy started this type of reasoning after he learned that his father had killed the neighbor's poodle. So, I don't feel quite so crazy about my weird thinking now. I think we become super cautious about whom we trust with our lives.

I don't know for sure. My mother was always warning us kids not to eat anything that my grandmother prepared. As recently as ten years ago, I was spending the holidays with my father and my grandmother, and she slipped something bitter tasting in my ice cream. I took one taste and threw it out. Since she was mentally unstable, I wasn't surprised she was still doing it.

would an Aspie service dog help me to remember to pay my bills?

that would be nice

Merle

actually the fasces was seven rods that bound together were stronger than each rod on it's own. Ayn Rand says fascism is the dictatorship of the elite or wealthy. ( as opposed to communism which is the dictatorship of the poor)

Merle

My analyst told me that I was right out of my head
The way he discribed it he said 'd be better dead than alive
I didn't listen to his jive
I knew all along that he was all wrong
And I knew that he thought I was crazy but I'm not, oh no

My analyst told me that I was right out of my head
He said I need treatment but I'm not that easily led
He said I am t'he type that is most inclined
When out of his sight to be out of my mind
And he said I was nuts
No more ifs or ands or buts,oh no

They say as a child I appeard a littele bit Wild with all my crazy ideas
But I knew what was happening
I knew I was a genius
What's so strange when you know that you're a wizard at three
I knew that this was meant to be

Well they say little children are supposed to sleep tight
That's why I drank a fifth of vodka one night
My parents got frantic,didn't know what to do
But I saw some crazy scenes before I came to
Now do you think I was crazy
I may have been only three but I was swinging

They all laughed at A. Graham Bell
They all laughed at Edison and Einstein
Now why should I feel sorry if they just
Couldn't understand tha reason and the logic that went on in my head
I had a brain it was insane
So I just let them laugh at me when I refused to ride
On all those double decker buses
All because there was no driver on the top

My analyst told me that I was right out of my head
The way he described it he said I'd be better dead
than alive
I didn't listen to his jive
I knew all along that he was all wrong
And I knew that he thought
I was crazy but I'm not oh no

My analyst told me that I was right out of my head
But I said dear doctor I think that it's you instaed
Because I have a thing that's unique and new
It proves that I'll heve the last laugh on you
'Cause instaed of one head
I got two
And you know two heads are better than one


Joni Mitchell

Joni Mitchell was inducted into the Canadian Songwriters Hall of Fame and I was watching it last night. I looked for a song to post but couldn't decide which one. Thanks, Merle!! You did it for me!

and ooooh they used to laugh at me when I refused to ride
on those double decker busses because there was no driver on the top. .

no driver on the top???

when I heard this at . . maybe 22, . . I understood it immediately and completely and I felt I felt the same way.
instant recognition of what ever mind set that thought that way.

isn't it interesting how we have the gift to understand both NT and Asperger's Syndrome thought?

if I didn't sign my name every time
would you know who wrote it?

Merle

OOoooo 2 posts in one day, I AM getting bolder. Cosmic Cat are you referring to "The Curious Incident of the dog in the Nitetime" (I think thats the whole name. ) I loved that book also! Just ordered "Born on a Blue Day" by Daniel Tammet (The savant who can talk about how he sees and does things) Saw a special on him on the "Science Channel" and ordered it the next day.
Thank you for your condolences Chuck, it's been 4 years 1 month and 1 day, and I'm just getting to where I can mention it w/out breaking down totally, am slowly being able to express the unending pain of it more and more. But I realize it depresses people and I don't want people to feel sorry for me, so I don't talk about it much still. It's an "Open Homicide" case in Jacksonville Florida and I'll proably NEVER know what really happened to her. The autopisies say she should't be dead at all, like she laid down went to sleep and never woke up. I have to wait for technology to catch up I guess. My signature at the bottom of this is the second to the last line in a song that really helped me get thru it cause I believe in physics, so for me nothing ever truly dies. Espically like the last two verses.(Where the music speeds up and gets a great groove on, those words are very poignant for me. Also LOVE Paul Simons "Once Upon a Time I was an Ocean" off of the "Surprise" CD but can't find it on anywhere online to share w/ you.I JUST learned how to do this so I'll try to put it on here. Lets see if I can pull it off
A little "shew" just ran across the floor, since it's colder they've started moving indoors for the winter, I don't have the heart to kill them, ( I step around ants on the sidewalk even) they seem to know it and are getting pretty ballsy.
Gonna submit this now and see if it worked. Wish me luck If I fail at least I tried.
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fQ3wpjdYMqk[/youtube]

YEAHHHH!! ! I did it. If you can't bear to sit thru 7 min of it the last 3 are the best, but the whole song is beautiful.

For Reika:

Once upon a time there was an ocean
But now it's a mountain range
Something unstoppable set into motion
Nothing is different, but everything's changed

It's a dead end job, and you gets tired of sittin'
And it's like a nicotine habit you're always thinking about quittin'
I think about quittin' every day of the week
When I look out my window it's brown and it's bleak

Outta here
How am I gonna get outta here?
I'm thinking outta here
When am I gonna get outta here?
And when will I cash in my lottery ticket
And bury my past with my burdens and strife?
I want to shake every limb in the garden of Eden
And make every love the love of my life

I figure that once upon a time I was an ocean
But now I'm a mountain range
Something unstoppable set into motion
Nothing is different, but everything's changed

Found a room in the heart of the city, down by the bridge
Hot plate and TV and beer in the fridge
But I'm easy, I'm open, that's my gift
I can flow with the traffic, I can drift with the drift
Home again?
Naw, never going home again
Think about home again?
I never think about home

But then comes a letter from home
The handwriting's fragile and strange
Something unstoppable set into motion
Nothing is different, but everything's changed

The light through the stained glass was cobalt and red
And the frayed cuffs and collars were mended by haloes of golden thread
The choir sang, "Once Upon A Time There Was An Ocean"
And all the old hymns and family names came fluttering down as leaves of emotion

As nothing is different, but everything's changed

Rhymin' Simon

I've decided I must take issue with the last line of Reika's sig: "If only closed minds came with closed mouths."

This would definitely NOT be a good idea, because, if closed minds indeed DID come with closed mouths, they'd have nowhere to put their feet!

Reika wrote:

Yes, that's the book. I guess I shouldn't have given part of the plot away, sorry to those who haven't read it and would like to. I will have to order "Born on a Blue Day", thanks for the tip.

Also, thanks for sharing "I Grieve" with us. Very beautiful, moving, thought provoking. I am also in the throes of grief. Lost my 21 yr old grandson suddenly and tragically this past May Always trying to connect with him. Hard to absorb and accept life without him. So sorry about your daughter. I never really understood the impact of grief on one's life until it hit mine, ours. I understand how you feel about not wanting to "bother" people by talking about your daughter and your loss. I feel the same way when I bring up Aaron. I would share the PG video with my daughter, but she won't, refuses to, listen to music. My husband and I bought her an ipod shortly after Aaron died, thinking it might help her to listen to music. She appreciated our giving it to her, but can't bring herself to enjoy the things she once did. She won't allow herself any joy at all and just goes through the motions of living because her other children need her to move on and experience life with them.

Excellent reasoning, Lau.

Reika and CC: BIG Aspie hugs to both of you!

Your hugs mean very much to me, Lauri. Thank you.