The Dino-Aspie Ex-Café (for Those 40+... or feeling creaky)

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What the hell? I take a little 12 hour nap and you folks have all misplaced humors and things and Chuck's grown a pot belly??? Ewwww. (Maybe you should take a pregnancy test, Chuck?!) Only thing worse than a dunlapped gut on a guy is a guy who looks like a frog wearing blue jeans. Think about it.

Mmmm, no, maybe... nevermind.

Ok, things are filed by functionality. You'll find them loosely grouped by main function in piles around the Cafe. In the cases of things that are turning moldy or are getting blotchy and look like they might ooze, they're probably under the sink. Things that even remotely resemble cat crap have been scraped up with a spatula and flung into the "special" trash can just outside the back door. (Don't use the spatula with the black handle for any "kitchen" work.)

Speaking of which, I was wearing industrial thickness rubber gloves and washed my hands thoroughly after finishing up there yesterday and after three more washings, including with antibacterial soap, my hands still smell like... you guessed it. Anybody got any suggestions of how to get rid of it, other than pure bleach? My skin is looking a bit ... stressed.

(manager of the shelter recommended to all involved in the endeavor that shoving ones' hands up ones' own backside would improve the smell somewhat, or at least make it a little more familiar. )

Spent yesterday researching "resources for AS adults"...you wouldnt think it would have taken me all day to figure out...there's no such thing,but I was being perservassive?I did find some interesting things on support for employees with disabilities but find myself in a catch 22(perusual).I have worked pretty consistantly(with only a few break-downs and some support from my parents).


Yet,my "work record" does not show the "cost" of doing these jobs in my stress-levels,depression or in the achy joints from all the physical labor type jobs I have done.I have survived mostly by only doing over-night work,which allows several hours of down-time,(something other jobs dont offer).I think the stress, is taking a toil on my health but until I actually "have" a psychological or physical collapse....I can get no help.There is no such thing as "preventitive" measures in employment or social services.There are already to many people in worse situations then mine and I dont begrudge them the resources,but.....Some-one needs to wake up to the reality that there is such a thing as an "AS adult" who has no/little family support.

Today I turned 44 and have another 20 years of work ahead.My physical and mental ability to deal with stress appears to be...declining and this scares me.The only jobs I can get,at present,are ones that I am very ill-suited for,involving physical labor or social contact in unpredictable and sensory over-load settings.What frustrates me is that I(logically or not)think that with some minnimal support,I could find a job that I could do well without feeling like I'm killing myself.

(End self-pit rant)

Postie...thanks for the Newegg suggestion....I will check it out.

Also,I find the concept of "hard-wiring" for positive/negative "thinking" intersting.It is something I have given some thought to,and had the following theory.......

Society needs a percentage of it's population to see the negative in "life".It is what motivates inventions,social changes and improvements in all areas of life(government,education,etc).I believe this and it is what bothers me so much about Bush's declaration that to "question" the rightness of our "war on terror" ie preimptive invasions of another country(ies..hello Iran) is some how "defeatist and unpatriotic".


There is a "catch" though.Seeing "only" the negative leads to rage and depression.The first can lead to irrational actions(terrorism) and depression can sap your energy to "do" anything to positively change the negative things you see.Rage needs to be harnassed into positive action.Depression needs to allow for "hope" for change.These have been two of my major obsticles.I had to make a choice for my own survival,(as being dead didnt seem to accomplish anything except one less human taking up space and resources),to stop "informing myself" about the planets destruction and past and present inhumaities(which appear ALL to human,as animals never act so cruelly).All the time spent reading about "such things" did not make me more able to fight against them but just created a desire to die to escape the worlds insanity.


Hard-wired....I dont quit understand this concept.When someone has brain injury,they can sometimes "re-wire" their brains,access new areas of the brain to preform the tasks once hard-wired in the damaged areas....yet,some cant seem to do this.Makes me curious to understand what is "different about those that can and those that can't.Youth seems to play a part(brain is more "plastic")
but,is this possible with AS wiring?Some seem to be able to "fake" NT wiring but if we were actually able to be rewired...it shouldn't be such a draining process to "act NT".





Nan,I am going to try and keep your experience with the cats in my mind when I am complaining about the 10 piles of doggy diaria I clean up each night(seems epidemic in our place...stress?).Thank you for doing this for all of us.....the planet needs this type of "good karma" to balance some of it's insanity.

Happy Birthday Krex.

Thanks blessedmom.


Chuck....I was interested in your comment about Eucaliptus.I add it to my bath(love the smell)and the cough drops I'm addicted to list it as the second ingredient.Is it possible that I am addicted to it.Does it do anything possitive,(beside killing the taste in my mouth that bothers me and clearing my sinuses?)If you have any links to what "over-dose" could do..how much it takes,side-effects,I would be interested.I eat about 80 cough drops a day....am I poisening myself?

I do finaly have a DRs appointment on the 30th to address my stress,thyroid levels,achy joints and tendons,IBS,uterin tumor,fatigue,and non-stop rashs and hives.I am going to ask her to check for Lupus,ANA,allergies.Anything else I should consider getting checked?(adrinal levels?)

Thanks CC....

Something else I have been wondering about.How to judge pain,they always ask you to rate it at the DRs and I find it very difficult.

I was raised a a Christian Scientist to ignore pain.I dont talk to other people my age(and couldnt get in their bodies to feel their pain,anyway,so how do I know what is "normal pain" to feel at 44?This kind of ambiguity is one reason I hate going to the DRs.It makes me feel so stuipid to not know the answers to their questions.Poor memory makes it worse...how long have you had this symptom,has it gotten worse..those are hard questions for me.I have tried to keep a "record" but forget to write it down(especially when I start feeling better.lol)Every thing in my body seems to go in "cycles"...the achy joints,IBS,rash/hives...they all clear up for awhile and then come raging back.I cant seem to find a pattern or "trigger".

I am dreading this appointment,afraid I will break down crying(s I always do when I cant find the words to explain).Not only is this embarassing but the DRs no longer think it is "physical" and automatically assume it's because I'm "just depressed or stressed".I wish they could undertand the whole chicken and egg thing....The physical things are "causing" me to be more stressed and the not knowing how to "fix it" is making me feel hopeless and depressed.As soon as I start crying,they stop listening and they write it off as "psychlogical" and no longer their "problem".

This studies conclusion or idea of negative and positive thinking of our future being hardwired, is hard to understand without more info. My take on hardwired is, it would have to be in the genetics. So this statement doesn't exactly make sense that it could be. I could see where we might be predisposed to one or the other, positive or negative. How they can say it is hardwired when I think it can be overridden, which by the definition of hardwired can't be.

Hardwired would be..... the bee dance, birds migrating, turtles when born heading for water.

I dunno, the idea is intriguing but what they have for the research model and method, I would find just as interesting.

Happy birthday Krex. 44? Geeze Louizzee, you know how to make a guy feel old, so'k you can't catch me. Unless I trip over my pot belly. I almost bought one you know...she was a sweety and liked her ears scratched. Swampblossom kept telling me, "get her", "get her", I don't know why I didn't anymore. I've always thought the little Vietnamese potbellied pigs were really cool. Well if I had gotten her, I could trip over her and you could catch me, probably good thing I didn't. You could have turned a massive amount of years older in one birthday, don't want that.

Krex, Happy Birthday, first of all. And then, I'd like to say that I could relate to so many things that you said, that I am temporarily speechless. The doctor's visit can be very frustrating, because I, too, can become overwhelmed by the sheer magnitude of translating my symptoms and pain levels from pictures, into words that they can understand. Sometimes it helps to right a list of symptoms and hand it to them. They may think it strange that I've suddenly gone non-verbal, but it helps. As for the work, I have been there, and and not to discourage you - I can only share my experience, but I firmly believe this is why I can no longer work, no matter how badly I want to. Years of overwhelming stress, coupled with PTSD, finally brought me down. And its a crying shame that there aren't any resources for Adults with AS.

HAPPY 44th BIRTHJDAY KREX!! !
(If I knew how to add balloons and cakes and other birthday accroutements I would. )
Good luck at your Dr. appointment. I have one today also, so when you get ready to cry think of me and we'll do "The Vulcan Mind-Meld" and be o.k. throughout the ordeal together. O.K.?
Nan, I haven't been watching the news or reading the paper so Ive been completely out-of-touch w/ the world but let it suffice to say that you have my utmost respect and deserve all commendations for what you do for those cats.(I LOL at what your boss suggested, felt good to laugh again.) "Your a better man than I Gunga Din."
Has anyone heard from Lupine yet?
LOVED "Guns, Germs, and Steel" so much went and got the DVD set. Already gave it away to a fellow "seeker of knowledge" who had some heart trouble and too much time in the hospital w/ nothing good to watch.
Postie , I could NEVER hate you, you make me laugh and I LOVE how you say what you think w/ no self-imposed censorship. Thank you for even remembering my "Service Dog Quest" That alone speaks volumes about your inherently kind nature.
And thanks Richie, I emailed my "Financial Advisor" at my bank and was dreading it and then (how syncronistic is this) the guy who hadn't even gotten my email yet happens to walk into where I work and we get to talking and he answered ALL my questions and I go give him my money on Monday and it's FREE. He's going to try to dissuade me from this particular mutual fund I can allready tell, but I'v made up my mind and I'm gonna do it. And it's GONNA be the fund I want, not him.
Have to go check the P.O. box waiting to hear about my daughters grant. Will check in later...after the yuckky Dr. Good luck at yours too Krex, I'll be thinking of you.