The Dino-Aspie Ex-Café (for Those 40+... or feeling creaky)

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Yeah. "The Day After Tomorrow".

Because no one understands us, and since we're not 'normal' we must therefore strive for 'normality'. If your daughter is seriously affected, she must therefore, being young and helpless, be helped along toward 'normality'. Curbies, I think, are NT's with an overinflated sense of their own normality. Since you, I we, are autistic, they must help us see how 'abnormal' we are, and how far we are from 'normal', which in their 'mind' is where all of us need to be.

I've watched NT's like this for years, and there is no helping them. They will never get that normal is, like all things, relative, and their view is only right when applied to themselves.

This of course applies not at all to the fine NT's who may patrol this forum.

I leapt into those same two threads myself, DeaconBlues. I think we are just seeing some of the frustration of the "Find a Cure for Autism" lobby over recent events in the... should we even call it a community? Specifically, the withdrawal of the "ransom notes" advertising campaign, and the listing on fark.com of Autism Speaks's aborted legal action against the creator of a parody site.

There is deep, deep money at stake here. Money that was supposed to come from frightened and unhappy people. Scared people who feel that they must somehow transform themselves, or people close to them, into someone else's ideal image.

Agreeing also with duncan's points on this.

Deacon, I've been to a couple of those threads as well.

Yeah, it's frustrating, and a little irking. But I realized many of the people on those threads are kids who grew up with interventions we didn't have. Anyone else has something else going on. So these are people who were constantly told a different set of crap than we were. They were told they were f**** up and useless, and wouldn't be able to get along in the world unless they somehow "learned" to be NT.

My crap was my mother and father shamed me into acting the way she wanted but then left me alone the rest of the time. They didn't really know me, but they weren't of the generation who wanted to be buds with their kids. Plus blue collar and all that.

But at least I wasn't told not to stim. I wasn't told to socialize more, because we lived in the toolies and there wasn't anyone to socialize with. My folks thought they knew more than the school officials, and ignored all of their calls for intervention (I would've been classified HFA when I was small). I may've been abused for part of the time, but at least the message I got, though it was enraging at times, was that I had more potential than I portrayed. So I was expected to act like it. I had all of these skills that indicated I was intelligent as hell, so dang it, my folks expected me to get with the program. Not that I ever did socially, but I tried like hell.

So, as it turns out, at this point of time, is that I'm curmudgeonly as hell, and skeptical of anyone who thinks a cure for anything will be the way, because, with what I've been through, a cure for cancer doesn't cure death or suffering in the end, and so called neurotypical behavior is a lie, and just an excuse to for a societal paradigm down people's throats, just so we have to go through the process all over again when society decides what's going to be acceptable next. There's not a damn thing wrong with us. I don't care if someone is severe Kanner's or Aspie, or just a dink. Ways have to be found to help people of all stripes and polka dots, and accept them, because they weren't born just to piss the uber neuro elite off.

All of this curism is just a facade for bigotry. If we had cancer, we wouldn't be treated like pitiful pariahs. We'd get compassion, and acceptance, and a little bit canonized for how strong we are. Instead, with this curebie nonsense, we get how we are such a drain on society, and we are lonesome, and pitiful, and pathetic. I hear this alot from the teens to tweener Aspies, who are as likely spouting their adolescent angst as anything else, and connecting everything wrong in their lives to their Aspieness.

And guess what? Cure an Aspie, and life will still suck....Life is set up that way. Being an Aspie is just different. There will always be trouble.

I wouldn't read those threads anymore, Deacon. Those are people unable to process information, who lack the experience in life to know what they are talking about, and who just might have a mental illness that makes them so difficult to understand. It's because they don't know what's really driving them. In a real sense, they deserve compassion, but I understand if you don't want to give it to them. They are pains in the butt.

Do they know your story? I mean, you're successful and pretty together, and they still spout this stuff with you on the thread? I find that weird and further proof they can't see the forest for the trees...

Take care, Metta, Rjaye.

Metta

Very well put, Rjaye!

Hey gang! I wanted to support you. I hate it when these posters upset you. They have no right to judge you.

((((( )))))

nannarob, you were the main NT I had in mind when I posted "This of course applies not at all to the fine NT's who may patrol this forum. " at the end of my answer to DeaconBlues.
You are the best!

umm, they appear to be very similar to those folks who beat on your door and try to shove their religion down your throat even after you've told them you're not interested. must be a similar character flaw in all of 'em. and the same basic mechanisms at work, just substitute "cure" for "my particular flavor of god".

Made it thru another year. Emotionally exhausted, have missed you all and proably won't go back and read the last 140 pages. Did I miss anything?

Most of these "curebies" are in an awful hurry to eat themselves up and we are in their way....
As for the zealots and others who want me to believe what they believe I only have one thing to say....
Please don't blow up the planet, I live here too!

Hey Reika! I thought you would be in hibernation for a bit longer.

I've been thinking of you, especially all through the 25th.

Have a coffee and a muffin - a chocolate chip muffin!

I wonder if I could get a government grant to study what this charachter flaw might be. Think of it! I could be paid hundreds of thousands of dollars by the US government to use how I want, then 5 years later write up some quackish quasi-scientific mumbo-jumbo about how I and my 'team' were zeroing in on what we called the 'narrow-minded a**hole' gene. They would become 'abnormal', with a quantified 'condition'. We could have telethons! Benefit concerts! Maybe even a message board where they could post about their genetic flaw!
They could even divide into different disorders on the Narrow Minded A**hole Spectrum: Curbies and Godbies.

Last edited by duncansbass on 26 Jan 2008, 4:53 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Thanks for your kind words, Duncanbass, and your insight into my personality! (You're all guuna get a shock when you meet me!)

I still believe that there are many fine people in the population who have little understanding of aspergers. My friends listen to me when I talk about my grandchildren. Their eyes start to glaze over when I babble about Wrong Planet, so I try not to obsess about that.

So the key is education.

Shame we can't cure the curebies!

Welcome back, reika! Same cafe, different faces!

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QVS3WNt7yRU[/youtube]

The cafe is very quiet lately. Are we all becoming old fuddy duddies?

lau and my deaughter Smelena meet in about 8 or 9 hours. I'm as excited as if I were there!

It's good to see you back, Reika! I've been thinking about you and sending healing thoughts your way, especially yesterday. You didn't miss much but we sure did miss you.