The Dino-Aspie Ex-Café (for Those 40+... or feeling creaky)

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Dino-speak continued topic

Thank you for the link to Krex's store, blessedmom.

It is difficult to lose loved ones, wsmac. All our prayers are with you. Your daughter's tribute to your mother showed a great deal of mature sensitivity.

I am not good with showing feelings of grief but I would not say anything that would hurt or diminish those who grieve. Please accept my sincere condolences.

Dear Hartzofspace: Sometimes I have had blue spells where I seem to cry for no valid reason. I just let it out and then try to figure out later what it is. If I feel down lately I have been revisiting the topic on Super Mario Galaxy that is purported to be recruiting people as a "homosexual recruiting tool." The stars emphasis on the letters spell a sort of acronym:U R MR GAY. Just so ludicrous I laugh my head off! Just when you thought you would be permanently depressed...!

Hi, Nan!

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UtgXus3eiII&feature=related[/youtube]

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9OfQLRtdMvw&feature=related[/youtube]

My condolences to you and your daughter, wsmac. Also sorry to hear that you are finding your ex-wife's attitude distressing.

After 17 years together, you know her better than any of us do, and therefore have a better idea of what to look for. Not to justify her coldness, but possibly to explain it, might be that she genuinely does not know how to approach such an emotional subject with you. When she is ready, assuming you are still in contact and still on speaking terms, she might shed some light on this, and surprise you.

The death of someone close can affect you in ways that you don't expect, sometimes well after the event. Even so, I hope you find comfort in your happy memories of your mom. Best wishes to you and your family.

Sorry to hear about your loss wsmac. It's hard losing a loved one, and I feel for you and your daughter. Your relief at the end of mother's suffering wasn't selfish - it was the sign of a loving son who didn't what their mother to have to bear too much pain.

Grief will manifest itself with you in its own way in its own time. We're all different and it strikes us all differently.

Best to you and your family.

I couldn't resist cross-linking to this comment from RudolfsDad.

Dear wsmac,
May God gentle your grief.
I always figured I would be a basket case after my mother died. Then when she did, I had very few tears. I still miss her when I want to send her a newspaper article or go to an art show with her or complain to her about my daughter, but generally I've been very calm about it. Then my younger brother died, and I had to be very gentle with myself because I became absolutely stupid and cried several times. What was the difference? I regretted that I had not spent more time with my brother? That he had been married only five months to the woman I found for him? I don't know.

Hello everyone! It's very quiet this morning.

My beloved husband had an operation yesterday - a male thing. He is doing well. One relative wanted me to spend the morning with her so that I wouldn't worry. Little did she know about WP and WP friends! Worry? No point in that!

Grieving and healing topic

What you are about to read is going to sound heartless, and I would not blame anyone if they were angry with me.
When my parents died (at separate times), I did not feel anything. I never had a relationship with either--at least one of quality. If my younger sister died right now, I would probably not blink an eye. We have never been close. The only close relationship I have ever had is with my kids.

I never much cared about my parents and siblings. No love lost there as there was never any in the first place. Just a toxic relationship that I ended many years ago. My oldest daughter likes her aunt, my sister. I do not discourage her being with her aunt, but I want nothing to do with it. This has caused some rift. I have told Janet how I feel about her aunt, and I have no wish to have anything to do with her, but I wish her the best of luck.

I hope no one has any other problems like this.

Lurking as usual....I noticed a subtle change to the index page.

About grief....

When my cat died I felt like a lion was chewing on my heart.It was powerful and very physical and the lion whould leap on me everytime I saw something that reminded me of a place that my cat had been,done something that opened my heart(he was so spunky and always into "something".He is still in a home made coffin in our garage because I cant bury him to far from me and the ground here is frozen(I want to bury him out-side the patio area so I can sit out there in the summer with him.

When my BF grandma died this week(she was 101 and a really awesome lady),I just felt grateful because she has been praying to die for years..not physical pain but bored with life and wanting to die before she lost her mind like so many of the people in the place she lived.

I have thought often of how I will feel about my parents death.They have shut me out of their daily life(or I did that,when I first tried suicide at 16?)but they have always been there for me when I have had a "break-down" or needed rent money or another "emergency".It is clear they dont want me as a part of their lives but they are the only support system I could ever count on....They believe in the "responsibility" of family ties...they just prefer doing it from a distance.I can't even invision them ever dyeing...it's like imagining the ocean evaporating some day.Inspite of our lack of a relationship...their dying will feel like I am an astronaut whose life line has been cut to the space craft...I see myself floating in space.I will be invisable in the world.