Aspie or just a sociopath?

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Hello,
I am new to the whole concept of autism and I am wondering if Aspergers might fit the description of my entire life. I view the world differently than others. My peers and family think differently than me and I notice it and get frustrated. I feel like I am trapped in my own mind making decisions and dealing with anxiety/depression with backed up logic. I started having problems with behavior during middle school due to bullying and frustration of not being able to socialize because I didn't know how to at all.

Parents, teachers, and students all made me feel hopeless and depressed. Indeed the parents and school system recognized my social anxiety when it was too late(got in trouble with the law) and I spent the rest of my k-12 years on an education plan designed so that teachers would make me talk and participate in class. Sure I abided by the education plan but I only learned how to communicate and work with adults. I have no natural ability to socially "network" such as making friends or participating in groups. As the years go by, I develop a sociopath conscience to help me interperet the world in a way that I can understand it.

I grew up with a speech impediment and spent 2 years getting rid of that. I have horrid handwriting as others tell me. I have always tried to act as if I was normal but when it comes to conversation with a peer, it's a brick wall for me and it's very confusing. I have been to therapists a several years ago and I have always kept my inner feelings and mentality behind the inner voice that interprets the world for me in a logical and understandable form, away from the evil doctors I was forced to see. I guess you can say I was in denial my entire childhood.

I am now 20, in college and suffering a debilitating case of anxiety and mild depression which I am now seeing a counselor for because I can no longer counsel myself as it all gets confusing when I try to "self-help". There is only one person in the world I can call my best friend as we think very alike with the same interests and view the world logically and sometimes cynically. I recently discovered that she had Aspergers and did not understand the disorder herself. So I looked it up and the symptoms/stories eerily matched my life and also her life too. Right now I feel somewhat enraged that no one even suspected that I could have a disorder such as this even when my behavior pointed to something more than just "social anxiety". I don't feel anxious when im talking to people, I feel confused and frustrated. I know what real anxiety feels like and it is not pleasant at all.

Im sorry if my rant is a little confusing, I lose track of what im trying to construct when thoughts like these rush through my mind.

Anyone know what steps I should take for diagnosis? I recently met with a counselor but im not sure if she would be able to diagnose something like this...

Carefully took the 200 question quiz, a nice fat blob between Intellectual and Aspie.

I am no expert, but I would say that you being on here asking for feedback, requesting the insight and opinions of others indicates that you are probably not a sociopath.

What do you mean by sociopath? I don't seen anything in what you've said suggesting you could be a sociopath as I've seen the term used, and such sociopaths have enough differences from aspies that they really don't look alike. Therefore I am wondering if you are using the term differently.

Welcome to WP!

Welcome to WrongPlanet.

Hello Ztower, welcome to Wrong Planet!

Welcome to WrongPlanet.

To WrongPlanet!! !

Hey welcome! Hope you find what you looking for!

Welcome to WrongPlanet!

If you want a formal diagnosis, make sure you find a psychiatric professional who specializes in autism spectrum disorders. Otherwise you're likely to run into someone who doesn't know what to look for and you may not get a proper diagnosis. OASIS is a website that lists specialists by state (if you're in the US). Also, in my experience most autism specialists are child/adolescent psychiatrists, so even though you're 20, you might end up seeing one of those but that's okay, because they usually have a lot more experience treating autism than an adult psych MD.

You might want to check this out and go from there. In my experience, finding a good doctor is a crap shoot. Every one I've found just wants to treat me as ADD and shove stimulants at me. They do help with concentration somewhat but daily use gives me headaches.


http://www.help4aspergers.com

Thanks guys, it's starting to sink in and I feel a lot less confused about "what is wrong with me". I will bring this up during my counseling session and hopefully I can get her to explore this with me.

Sociopaths have no feelings. They merely mimic them. That should eliminate sociopath from your diagnosis since you keep talking about your feelings.

I don't know what your diagnosis should be however. Your Dr. would be a much better choice to make that decision.