Hi everyone.
I have been lurking a few weeks. Done lots of online tests and read books about Asperger's syndrome. From these I think I have either Asperger's syndrome or at least BAP or PDD-NOS. I have close relatives who are undiagnosed aspies too (a sibling and one of their children). Also, a friend with extensive experience of people in the spectrum thinks I have Asperger's syndrome.
I had never thought about autism spectrum disorders until a year ago when by pure chance I did an online test (a version of Baron-Cohen's AQ test) and was surprised to get a high score. I used to think I was like everyone else, just ... odder. I knew I had issues with anxiety and depression (especially in my teens and twenties), with sensory sensitivity (sounds, light, smells, heights), shyness, feeling awkward in social situations, problems organising myself and switching tasks, needing lots of structure and "sameness", didn't like socialising (prefer one-to-one and lots of solitude), have a number of eccentric special interests (which might identify me to acquaintances if I named them), don't like sudden changes of plans, tend to tune out while listening to others, etc, etc ... but I never knew these might indicate something on the spectrum. When I went through university, "infantile autism" was regarded as a form of "child psychosis", and Asperger's syndrome hadn't even been named or described in English. Back then, unless you were uncontrollable ("a delinquent"), needing hospitalisation ("having a breakdown"), or trying to commit suicide, you were not regarded as having a significant psychological problem.
Because I am over 50, I have had plenty of opportunity to learn coping skills and become less depressed and anxious, although I still have problems with managing emotions, getting started on tasks and switching between them, shyness, social awkwardness, and sound sensitivity. Overall, I feel like a big mystery has been solved - "so THAT'S why I have always felt different and behaved that way!" I guess a _pervasive_ development disorder does explain a lot of things...
04 Mar 2010, 7:16 am
