Greetings from New Jersey!

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Hello all, my name is Chris and I am 19 years old. I came across this site a couple of days ago after, embarrassingly enough, I googled "I don't walk right." I had heard of Asperger's before but I did not know the symptoms or that I would exhibit nearly all of them. For example, when I'm in public and my mind is not in the "right place," which is very often, I feel extremely uncomfortable and unconnected from the world around me. My ability to walk correctly is then compromised as a torrent of emotions flood my brain and I start to think of every action I do, which I guess makes me look like a weirdo at times. I tend to see most people as non-relevant pieces of the(my) world I live in instead of actual individuals, which makes my anxiety even worse. Most of the time I can't help but be impersonal, and making eye contact and maintaining it with people is a chore, sometimes even my friends. I either feel like they can see deep down in my soul or that they know nothing about the real me, depending on my mood. Sometimes when a stranger looks me in the face I tense up and my eyes start to water(I'm not trying to cry).

I consider myself of above average intelligence and have scored extremely well on my PSATs and SAT, language being my strength and mathematics being my worst enemy(I cannot think of the numbers/variables and what I have to do with them long enough or coherently enough to solve the problem and it's frankly very boring to me and difficult to follow) . However, as detailed in many "symptoms" pages for Asperger's I tend to "obsess" over things of interest to me and spend an unusual amount of time on them. I LOVE maps and look at Google Earth, etc way too often, cities(sometimes SimCity sucks me into a time warp), and politics. I could spend hours on end being perfectly content "researching" just these three topics, which is obviously not "normal" for someone my age.


I can be very uncomfortable with my body and I often don't know what to do with my arms, which makes me think I look like a skittish weirdo, which translates to that being my reality. I will not approach a girl or even think about liking a girl until I know she is interested in me. Oddly enough, I am friends with the "popular" group from my old high school, partially due to what I refer to in my head as "riding my best friend's coattails." We have been friends since we were very young and even though we are very different in some ways, we are extremely close and I feel he is a part of me. However, our friends are into what any stereotypical "popular" group is into, sports. I am not saying I dislike sports, I am simply not interested in them enough to be able to maintain a conversation about them, besides maybe the Phillies(Go Phils!) Playing sports with my FRIENDS feels to me like actual mental torture and I always sit these activities out. They know my life has been pretty rough so far and I know they love me and care about me, but that emptiness persists. I just feel far more intelligent and intellectual than them and I mean that in the most loving, nonoffensive way. I just feel "inconvenient" and a burden to others a lot, which weighs on my mind until I just want to break down. It is important to note that I moved to New Jersey a couple of months ago, and although I visit my friends in Pennsylvania relatively often, I cannot help but feel even more isolated from them and I have virtually isolated myself up here in New Jersey because I am paralyzed by fear. Also, my sleep schedule is WACK and I pretty much have a phobia of going to bed early(sounds nuts, I know.) So, I will stay up very late every single night until I am absolutely exhausted to go to bed, which causes many problems.


Anyways, I am so SORRY if I went offtrack or bored you(I'm a victim of stream of consciousness.) I look forward to meeting all of you on the board and having some interesting discussions. OH...the main purpose of all of this was to see if actually getting diagnosed with Aspergers(If I have it) would pave the way to help me in any way, as I have read there is relatively little you can do for it. THANKS in advance for your replies!
(If I put this in the wrong section, feel free to move it mods!)

Thought you'd like this blog called STRANGE MAPS http://strangemaps.wordpress.com/

This is one of my favs: World War II: If Maps Could Fight
http://strangemaps.wordpress.com/2009/0 ... uld-fight/

HAHAHAHA, that WWII map is legendary, you just made my day with that
That strange maps site is like striking gold for me also, sweet!
Thanks Ja!

Hello Chris, welcome, enjoy your stay on the Wrong Planet!

Welcome to WP

To WrongPlanet!! !

Nice to meet you, Chris - and welcome aboard the WP.

Welcome to WrongPlanet, and welcome to my time warp.