many questions!! !!

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Hello all, I'm 31 yo male and I've just discovered this condition exists. I have a lot of questions and concerns about dealing with it.

Let me start by saying that reading through this forum has been very comforting for me and the last two weeks for me have started the healing process which I'm sure will continue for quite a while.

I have not yet told anyone that I believe I have autism, I don't know who I can trust that my emotions will be met with sincerity. To tell you the truth, I'm terrified anyone I tell will laugh uncontrollably at me, after all I think that society finds this condition to be a source of humour. For example, Peter Griffin could be argued to have AS, and look at what he means to people....despised, laughable, ridiculous etc.

I immediatetly was overwhelmed when I thought of all the people in my life that have been there for me despite the lack of emotional reciprocity, inattentiveness, disrespect, and general irritating behavior. My parents, whom I'm sure I've caused untold suffering yet still stand by me and wish the best for me.

I have had several careers ruined now by poor interpersonal relationships, I can't seem to get it right and now I may be taking on more than I can handle, taking a job where I will be responsible for marketing and client interaction. What's worse is that my dad's colleagues will be my boss's, and I don't know if I should tell him. My parents will be embarrased for not having known and them knowing won't even help me be successful.

There is a dark side of humanity that I have seen, I think that I project suffering in my face when I zone and it comes back at you 10 fold. There are people who like to see others in pain. Anything that is seen as effective in reducing suffering, is desired and competed over. Getting or taking what it is you want you have to be ready to defend your interests. What's more, there are people that will not let you enjoy what it is you love without trying to take it away from you, no matter what it is.

I have been thinking about visiting a psycologist, does anyone find therapy helpful? What type of issues can I expect to address?

Thank you for your responses

Welcome to WP! Hopefully, being able to communicate with people here will help you & going to a therapist may help you sort through your issues as well as get you a diagnosis and a way to move forward.

Hey, welcome

therapy can be helpful if you get a good therapist. some therapists sit there, repeat what you say, spew out some Ph.D mumbo jumbo at you and ask for their check. find a good therapist who actually hears what you're saying. the good ones take all of the important problems you face and talk them out with you.

with a therapist the topic are typically the problems you currently face. you'd probably talk about anxiety caused by social interaction and what the future brings.

Welcome to WrongPlanet, and welcome to my time warp.

Who understands Asperger's issues.

If they don't, it will be a waste of your time.

Greetings, insincere, and welcome to the WP forums.

Welcome to you- realize that the fears you're expressing come from the sum total of failed interactions and being misunderstood for one's entire life.

Knowing about what's going on DOES help immensely in adapting.

I, like you, just learned about this syndrome very recently. Words from a true expert I think are going to be the greatest help for anyone in our position.

I strongly recommend the book "The Complete Guide to Asperger's Syndrome"
by Tony Attwood. I'm absolutely devouring this book. It has completely dispelled so many of my fears and uncertainties that became active in me despite the sudden comfort that came with the idea that there was a good explanation for the hardships of my life thus far.

I agree with poppyx that you should try to find a therapist who is familiar with AS issues. I have been to a lot of therapists who caused more pain than healing because they mis-read my emotions (people with AS often don't emote the same way as the general population) and tried to get me to follow their agenda for me instead of really listening when I told them what *I* wanted to work on.

Best wishes and welcome to WP.

Hello insincere, welcome, enjoy your stay on the Wrong Planet!