Greetings!

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Joined: 28 Nov 2010
Age: 36
Gender: Female
Posts: 161

29 Nov 2010, 2:46 am

Greetings~

I am new to this forum. However, have been trailing it for a couple of weeks now. I am a 23 year old female who has led her life feeling completely isolated, awkward, and [for a lack of better words] very different from most people. All of my life most people would describe me as utterly strange, quirky, weird, geeky, introverted, and unique...

However, those words stabbed me with many pains as I grew up. I always wonder what is wrong with me: why I am unable to interact with other people the way I'm 'expected' to; why [even with my three closest friends] I feel like I can never actually feel close with them and disclose my deepest secrets; why I'm so clumsy; why I can remember the strangest facts and bring them up unbidden; why so many of my classmates hated me because I'd always set the standard for grades on vocabulary tests; why people literally creep away from me or grin knowingly when I start talking about certain subjects or using strange references to make a point; why people tell me that I have a very unique diction; why jokes and sarcasm tend to completely go over my head; why my letters, emails, and text messages are extremely academic and formal and somewhat aloof; why this, and why that.

Because I have a twin brother with a ["mild", undiagnosed] learning disability, an older sister with bipolar disorder, and another older sister with rebellious tendencies, and due to the fact that my parents don't believe in American Psychiatry because of a bad past experience [30 years ago! Psychology was honestly not as advanced 30 years ago!!], my problems were very often ignored and overlooked because they were not 'severe' - which I knew to be untrue from a very young age. However, I've learned to be a very self-sustaining, independent person.

I've been looking at a lot of "Aspies" quizzes in the past month. In one, I scored a 166 out of 200, in another a 37 out of 50, both indicating that I am more on the 'severe' side of Aspergers. In another test, I scored as being 'extremely pragmatic and systematic' as opposed to emotional. However, people generally know me as either a very 'happy go lucky' type of person or conversely a very quiet and withdrawn person, and even my 'friend', diagnosed professionally with Aspergers, said that I don't really have the traits of AS. These two ends of the same spectrum [no pun intended] have always confused me and led people on about certain views they have of me...

Would it benefit me at this point in my life to have a professional diagnosis? Could I perhaps have a social disorder other than Aspergers? Did you stop reading this post after the first paragraph? I made the font smaller to trick your eyes!

Shadi2
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 9 Nov 2010
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,237

29 Nov 2010, 4:19 am

Hello and welcome to WrongPlanet

No I didn't stop reading after the first paragraph lol

There is some traits you mention that do sound like AS, but of course its difficult to be sure since I don't know you. Maybe continue browsing the forums here and gather as much information about ASD as you can, it may help you figure it out, the more you know about it the easier it may be if you decide to seek an official diagnosis.

See you around hopefully

Shadi

p.s. thanks for the smaller font lol :wall:

_________________
That's the way things come clear. All of a sudden. And then you realize how obvious they've been all along. ~Madeleine L'Engle

Bunneth
Velociraptor

Joined: 1 Nov 2010
Age: 44
Gender: Female
Posts: 460
Location: Cambridge, UK

29 Nov 2010, 6:23 am

Hi and welcome to WP

From what you've written it sounds like you could have some kind of ASD but you never really know until you have a diagnosis. I'd say weigh up the pros and cons of getting a diagnosis and think about how you think you'll feel if you're told you do have an ASD, or if you're told you don't. I think it comes down to whether you would like the certainty of knowing either way or not.