World Gone Wrong

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Joined: 2 May 2011
Gender: Male
Posts: 1

03 May 2011, 10:37 am

Does anyone else here feel that they had their lives derailed at a very early age and never managed to get back on the tracks?

Nothing has ever worked out for me the way I wanted it to. I had essentially no friends all through elementary school, high school and college. The only employment I've ever found has been intellectually unsatisfying and well below cognitive capacity.

I've struggled to maintain myself in these occupations and had to leave for one reason or another: because of issues with co-workers or simply because my mental state interfered with my performance to the degree that I simply couldn't do the job anymore.

I've suffered from long stretches of unemployment and concomitant depression with nobody to lean on for support or understanding.

And although now I am in a stable relationship, it is extremely difficult for me to navigate and often causes me as much sadness as it does happiness.

Every day is a struggle for me just to stay afloat and year by year it seems that I sink just a little bit further. While I do hit periodic waves that raise me up to a good place, it's always fleeting and within six months I fall back to where I started.

It seems like the world went wrong when I was about three years old and has been working against me ever since. I have serious doubts about my future and imagine that eventually I'll find my life in a trough so deep that I'll never be able to climb back out.

I know this all sounds very depressing, but I'm not actually all that depressed.... I'm just in a self-reflective mood right now, and when I step back and look at my world this is what I see.

Is this the case for anyone else? If so, did you ever find a way out of it?

auntblabby
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 12 Feb 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 114,591
Location: the island of defective toy santas

03 May 2011, 11:44 am

hiya Stickman
welcome to this thing of ours
i hope you are good and thankful for being able to have a relationship of any kind. that makes you a "one-eyed king" in the land of the [socially] blind, AFAIC.
my only way "out of it" was just to be totally out of society, as a hermit who lives in the woods.