Hi everyone, I'm new here - I signed up a while back but din't say much. First, I am 27 and I've lived with a host of challanges that have forced me to look deeper into what is going on. Ever since I was a younger kid, people thought I was strange, "off". I do often think out loud, and in my head I do work things out - I talk to myself is what I'm saying. I've always been driven to love computers. When I was a little kid around 3 or 4, I would laugh banging on my dad's type writer. I've been working with computers for years. I find them to be the only thing that keeps me sane. I've never had close friends, I have a hard time relating to people.
I manage to do consulting in IT, and I'm currently working on my degree. But I've come to realize that I will never quite figure out the world in the way that others do. Sure, I found mathematics (not the way it was taught to me as a kid) as a beautiful field with so much that I literally started to almost cry when I tried to carry a suit case of all my mathematics books and engineering things at home. I never learned enough organization skills to plan ahead and ship my books. Another challange is that I have a hard time managing many things in life at the same time. I of course am self taught. With a GED and never attending high school, my attempts at building a graphics engine 4 years ago, finally learning trig and geometry, I've found a new love besides computers.
I've struggled in so many ways - I can't even begin to go into anymore details, it hurts to think of how little I can honestly say that I understand about people. I decided that things were not going to work at the Pentagon despite the rave reviews of my technical ability. I should have realized trying to drag my non functional self to a job on the east coast, at a place where my challanges, not driving, having little life skills, at least I can keep myself clean and wear a suit, but trust me I'm not that type of person.
I dropt out of school in the 8th grade, got involved with a cult, and ... well thats all I can say. I am trying to deal with myself. Luckly I have an employer who understands me. One of my software programs was demonstrated to some very important people, and he's offered me a full time job. Hopefully I will be able to get my books back.
... I just hope other people can relate.
03 Aug 2011, 8:11 pm
