First post! (Hi, I'm new.)

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Joined: 27 Aug 2011
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 1

29 Aug 2011, 9:31 am

Hello.

This is my first time posting on this forum. I'm 22, and I'm a newly self-diagnosed Aspie. I have always known that my methods of reasoning are very different from most people's, but I never had a name for it. I also thought that my complete social ineptitude was simply my fault for not trying hard enough.

Anyway, I recently finished my summer job teaching mathematics (my special subject :-) ), and I had a final interview with my boss for feedback. She has taught for many, many years, and has worked closely with several students with Asperger's. She told me that she recognized many Asperger traits in me, and she recommended that I research it and get tested.

The past few days I've been really struggling (I'll get to this in another post), so I decided on a whim to look up Asperger's. I read the whole Wikipedia article straight through, and let me just say that it felt like an autobiography. It was shocking, to say the least. The article mentioned Wrong Planet, and that's how I came here.

I love reading the discussions on these forums. I have sought out quite a few socially-awkward people in my past, but in all of my short-lived friendships, I never met anyone who thought like I did. I was always odd, and no one ever understood the strange little difficulties that I had. This might sound bad, but I now elated to read the comments of all the people on this forum dealing with the exact same issues that I've dealt with my whole life. I never knew there were others like me.

Probably what has been the most difficult for me to deal with are my parents. Don't get me wrong - they're loving, caring, and actually really good parents. But while my family is a little odd, they're not Aspies. They're not like me. My parents have always wanted - no, expected - me to be normal, and they're confused when I have trouble. They seem to think I'll grow out of it, that I'm in some phase - a phase that is lasting 22 years and counting.

But it's not all bad. I actually think that my parents' expectations have helped me to better understand and interface with NTs. For example, as distracting and uncomfortable as it is, I think I've nearly mastered eye contact. And with that, I feel I've gotten good at reading faces. (Tip: While it is true that a person's eyes show their emotion, it's their mouth that shows their comprehension.) However, the rest of my parents' expectations conflict with who I am, and that can be very difficult at times to deal with.

I just took the online "Aspie-quiz" that someone linked to. I got an "Aspie score" of 181 out of 200, and "neurotypical score" of 11 out of 200. I'll have to go back and closely check my answers for any bias, but I think the results are pretty clear. Now that I'm here, I have to ask: is there any benefit to being officially diagnosed with Asperger's? I feel like Asperger's is a part of who I am, not something that should be "cured" with drugs. I do, however, suffer from some related problems that I think I should get help with. Anyway, let me know if you feel that being diagnosed has helped you in any way.

Thanks.