Hi newbie, Not diagnosed

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Hi,

I'm in my late 20's and undiagnosed. I recently asked a GP about being tested and he said it could be a long and expensive process. He didn't speak to me about symptoms but I will be sure to ask him again on my next visit. In the meantime I thought that I'd share as any the friends I've tried to talk to about this don't seem to grasp it as a problem as I appear to be a normally functioning, socially outgoing person. Where to begin?

- Food. I just cannot eat fruit or most types of vegetable. Nothing to do with the taste, in most cases. The texture is repulsive. Crazy as it sounds. It has caused me enormous stress growing up. I'd have complete meltdowns at my mother for trying to "sneak" food I don't eat into my dinner or have her bare face lie to me about contents.

I hate going to restaurants because often what I order usually has a surprise ingredient not labeled on the menu, which leads to me complaining and appearing like a nutcase. I get extremely uncomfortable returning food. It can be very frustrating after waiting and have everyone looking at you. The words "would you not just try it?" or "just scrape it off" baffle me. People just don't seem to understand the isolation of appearing problematic for someone that just wants to enjoy everything the same as everyone else.

- Territorial. I don't like unnecessary sharing. That probably sounds harsh and selfish as I do love sharing when the terms make sense to me. For example. I can't grasp why anybody would want to use a mug I own when there's a full press full of other mugs. I was bad at sharing toys as a child. This behavior along with the meltdowns over food earned me the label of being a "spoiled" child.

- Meltdowns. I should probably speak about these. They come off as completely irrational to other people. When they finish my mood changes to unbearable sadness and shame. Usually they start with something small and are involved with someone invading my territory but get worse when I suspect the person is lying to me. Such as my mother giving me dinners with food I don't like. I couldn't understand why she would particularly after the hassle of every previous time she tried this.

- Loud noises. I remember hating school even though I was never bullied. I always felt uncomfortable and after I left I found more confidence in myself and being around large groups. But I was recently reminded of that discomfort of school when i started a college course with a large group. Its the noise in the small space of a classroom that makes me extremely uncomfortable. I hate noise and particularly if I've to sit near the front with it happening behind me.

- Speaking. I speak well in comfortable situations and as I've gotten older and more confident it's rare that I'll find myself in an uncomfortable situation for speaking. But when it happens it's almost like a switch and my pitch turns to a mumble that I can't raise. I can also become almost mute.

- Running. I've always loved sport but when in school people often commented on my "funny" run. I'm of medium height with a decent build. Everything's in proportion but even recently when trying to jog with a friend he commented on my feet making smacking noises as they hit the ground. I seemingly doing know how to move my limbs correctly when jogging lightly. It sounds stupid but its extremely frustrating to know that you're doing something very simple and getting it wrong.

- Obsessive thinking. If I find a genuine interest in something I become encyclopedic in my knowledge of it. I have to know everything about it and how it works. Films, comics but sometimes...

- Women. I over think everything when it comes to women. As I've gotten older and more confident I find it easy getting with them but extremely difficult following up. I play up every scenario of how things might go wrong and usually appear aloof or uncaring when in reality I'm just very indecisive when it comes to proceeding. I've often not called girls I wanted to because I become almost paralyzed by indecision. It's a recurring problem.

Well that's a long enough intro. I'd really appreciate hearing from anyone here.

Its hard to say. You have sensory issues and it seems like some anxieties. Do you think you have Aspergers?? Or..? I think stimming,
lack of understanding social cues, sensory meltdowns, occasionally clumsiness .... those are some signs too.. hm.. different ways of thinking and being sensitive to some touch maybe too are things to think about. Did you ever take the RDOS Aspie Quiz online just out of curiosity? That always shows a bit of direction. Some people debate its accuracy but its fairly accurate to my knowledge.

Welcome to WP!

Hi, thank you very much for responding and putting me on to that test. I've done others online and found them a little vague and frustrating. That one definitely hit closer to home with the questions. The results were.

"Your Aspie score: 128 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 109 of 200
You seem to have both Aspie and neurotypical traits"

As for your question about whether I think I have Aspergers. Well I have a sister that is ten years my junior that has dyspraxia. It was only through her diagnosis and difficulties that i saw similarities. I kept it to myself but after researching my sisters condition my mother kept making comments about me having aspergers. I thought she was joking but she insisted she was serious but that she thinks its "mild" with me. I never told her and still haven't to this day about my own concerns.

I do seemingly function normally with a group of friends and my struggles aren't even a fraction of what some people have to deal with. But at the same time I'm trying to find out the nature of my problems which have caused me tremendous frustrations in my life and left me feeling completely isolated at times.

I'm just tired of being perceived as difficult and moody and whatever other negative labels I've had thrown at me when I'm simply trying to live my life and get on with things.

I just wanted to join a forum to read about others experiences and share my own to get a better understanding because it's not generally a topic friends can relate to.

Thanks Tim.

Welcome to Wrong Planet!

To WrongPlanet!! !

hello

Welkome to WP

Mick