Hello from STL

Post Reply New Topic

Hi everyone

I'm still kinda new to all this.

Long story short, a coworker randomly asked me the other day if I was an aspie.

My first response was " Ummm, I'd first have to know what that is in order to give a proper answer."
She's always asking me about myself and I never really gave it a second thought.
She said she had aspie friends and I kinda reminded her of them.
After she explained aspergers a bit I started to think that there may be something to it.

I have another friend who used to work with autistic kids and received her doctorate a year ago in occupational therapy. I texted her about it and she literally said "I've thought for years that you might be an aspie"

Okay, I guess I should tell you about myself. lol

My name's Adam.
I live in St Louis and I'm 27 years old.

I have never felt normal around other people. I've sometimes felt like I was observing another humanoid species with their own social structures that I couldn't decipher.
I could blend in enough to not raise many alarms, but it was hard work.
I had a few friends when I was younger, but that was probably only because we were both obsessed with RC cars and general engineering. Which I still am to this day, 14 years later.

If I'm with a few friends and there's a conversation going on about a subject that I don't know much about or don't really care about, I hardly say anything. But if it's about one of my interests I can go on all day!

I don't really feel that much anxiety around my friends because I've known them for nearly half my life. New people I tend to not really interact with more than I have to for a while until I can observe them and figure out their personalities.

I don't feel I have too much trouble reading people. I get when their happy, sad or angry pretty easily, but when it's more subtle it sometimes confuses me.

I've always found it very hard to talk to my friends about personal stuff. Even if say.... someone does something that annoys me, I find it really hard to say something about it without getting worked up. If I do say something like.... "You know, you really pissed me off earlier about such and such"..... I physically and emotionally feel as if I just got done screaming at them. Once I got really really angry about something and I had to call customer service. I was so mad I was stuttering. That has only happened once in my life. If we're texting or IMing I'm not so closed and guarded. I can just organize my thoughts better on a screen.

I have 3 main hobbies. radio control, astronomy and target shooting.
I usually rotate between them every few months and right after I switch I'm completely obsessed.
My circle of friends is made up of people who share at least one or two of my interests.

When I focus on one of my hobbies I can block out everything else and totally focus on it. I've sat down once and spent 10 hours straight building an rc helicopter. I'm also a pretty good machinist. If I'm working on the lathe I can just stand there for 5 minutes watching it cut the metal.

After spending a couple days reading about aspergers and thinking about all the little things I do that I never even noticed before, it really really makes sense! I realised that I like to twirl small objects in the air. People asked me why I did it and I always said Why not?.
About a year ago I started noticing that I had to make a concous effort to make eye contact during a conversation. Usually the most I did was glance at the other persons face.
I just realized today a possible reason I automaticly say What? when someone asks me a question even if I heard them. It gives a couple more seconds to figure out how to answer and what words I wanna use.

I'd really like to know if I am actually an aspie. I took a couple quizes but I'm not sure about the accuracy.

I took the one at rdos dot net and it says:
Your Aspie score: 131 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 82 of 200
You are very likely an Aspie

I'd really like to actually go and get tested for it. Not necessarily because I want "to get fixed", I'm just really curious about it.

hello Adam
welcome to our neat little club
you and Gadge would probably get along famously.

Hi Adam! Welcome to Wrong Planet! Check out the different forums here. They are interesting and helpful. You do sound like you have at least some aspie traits, so if you are interested in more confirmation, a formal diagnosis will answer that question for you. Have your GP refer you to a doctor with experience with autism and Asperger's Syndrome.

There is no "fix" for either autism or Asperger's, but there are ways to help deal with these conditions. There is therapy for those who need it. People who suffer from anxiety and/or depression can be prescribed medicines for that. And there are coping mechanism to use when dealing with the NT world. You sound like you have found some coping mechanisms that have helped you, and you don't sound as if you need meds. They can sometimes have bad side effects. I too, am also using coping mechanisms instead of meds. I prefer to avoid meds unless absolutely necessary.

Remember, you are among friends here at Wrong Planet.

Thanks for the welcome.

I only put the getting fixed part in there because when I told another friend about all this he pretty much said There's nothing wrong with you! "Just because you're different doesn't mean you're wrong. People feel they need to fix everything"
I have other issues that I've for the most part have made peace with. Issues that other would consider wrong. I don't feel I need to be fixed. His comment just bugged me.

Welcome to the Right Planet!

Welcome to Wrong Planet!

Welkome to WP

Mick

Thanks again for the welcomes

I've been doing a lot of thinking over the past week and I'm growing more and more convinced that I may have aspergers. I know that self diagnosis isn't really a good thing to do (I'm by no means claiming to anyone that I DO have it yet), but so much of my life makes sense when looking at it now.

I don't know how many times someone has asked me to help them with something mechanical. I look at it and instantly see several possibilities as to how to fix it or do something another way that works. Most people are like "I would have never thought of that!" or "how the hell did you do that?" I don't usually know what to tell them because it's just so obvious to me. Before I started looking at it from an aspergers standpoint, I'd quite often get annoyed because they interrupt me from what I'm doing to help them with something they're fully capable of doing themselves.

I've been sorting through the half remembered memories of my childhood. I can't believe the things I didn't even think I remembered. My first memory was of my mom asking me how old I was today and I said Three!

One of the odder memories that now makes sense was the first time I remembered someone say Friday. The first image in my head was standing in a huge frying pan for a day! I even started getting really scared because i thought i was going to be cooked! (Literal thinking much?) I started realising that even when I got older I often took things literally at first.

This past week has been really eye opening because I've been looking at my childhood and remembering things that I had totally forgotten about. I've also started paying more attention to more things in my daily life.

I've never had this much self awareness! It feels good!