Hello everyone. I'm Emma, and I'm a 19 year old female from the UK. Previously diagnosed with long term and recurrent major depression and treated with 30mg Citalopram, I have been in therapy for some time now. Since I am moving back home for the summer (I live at my university the rest of the time), I had my final session of therapy for this year last week. At that session, my therapist suggested that a lot of what I had spoken to her about were symptoms/traits of Asperger syndrome, and that perhaps it would help me to be evaluated and, if I do have Asperger's, diagnosed, so that I am able to do things like attend support groups. Currently I plan to have an appointment with my GP next week, in which I will ask to be referred for an evaluation.
So, a bit about myself. I'm in my first year of university right now. I struggled a lot when I first went to university, because I cannot easily cope with even small changes in circumstance or routine. When I went to university, everything changed at once and my depression worsened and became very severe. I have not really made any close friends since starting university. Although there are people on my course who I talk to when I am with them, I do not really do anything social beyond that which has another purpose (i.e. I might talk to people before a lecture starts or whilst we eat lunch, but I would not arrange to go out for a drink and a chat). I am comfortable being social with some friends which I made as a young (<4y/o) child, and some other friends (who it took me several years of high school to find). Mostly I am awkward and unable to conform to the norms of small talk etc. in casual social situations with people with whom I am not already entirely comfortable.
On top of the need for routine and social difficulty, I also have obsessions and compulsive behaviours. These are unlike those which I have heard of in other people with AS. I compulsively watch particular TV shows (certain dramas, soaps, etc.) and read books - often the same episode or book over and over. I usually spend around 6 hours a day doing these things.
I am planning to be evaluated because if I do have AS, attending the support groups available at my university might help. At least, my therapist seems to think it could. Also, she says it might help me to understand myself better (although I'm not sure that I need to be officially diagnosed to do that. Even reading other people's experiences makes me feel a bit more understanding towards my own).
I've been reading posts on this forum and it is nice. I feel like I quite often am watching other people and trying to pretend that I'm feeling the same things as them and I don't really understand and can't recognise a lot of social cues. I keep reading things here and thinking "that is like me!" and I hope that that will keep happening.
Thanks for reading and if anyone has any experiences with being evaluated and/or diagnosed with AS, particularly as a late teen/young adult.
16 Jun 2012, 6:49 pm
