Hi, Cog here

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Hi there,

Difficult to know how to start. There we are, I've done it.

I am a 34 year old computer programmer (or Software Engineer, as I prefer to call myself ). I live on my own (thank God). I have no friends or any kind of social life. I prefer my own company, and only really feel content when I am on my own at home (I give a sigh of relief everytime I walk in the door).

I have finally managed to get my own bit of desk space at work where I don't have to share an area with anyone else. What a relief that was.

Leaving the house, going to the shops, dealing with people on the phone, making "small talk", social events, all these things and many more are nightmares for me.

Do I have Asperger's? In a funny kind of way, I hope so. At least that will be an answer.

I share many traits that I have read about the subject, but not all. Many things did raise my heartbeat when I read them, such as intolerance of bright light and environmental noise (for example, I can't stand ticking clocks, and have to keep switching off the photocopier in front of my desk at work because of the whining noise it makes, and I hate waking up to bright sunshine).

This post has contained a lot of "I" statements, and I felt a bit egotistical in writing all of those (me, me, me), but I have done so this time as a way of introduction to begin to let you know who I am.

Regards,

Cog

Welcome to WrongPlanet Cog. Sounds like you'll find a lot here that you'll relate to...

Dunc

Welcome to WP!

Hi, welcome to Wrongplanet.net.

I feel quite the same way as you. If you're not sure then you're probably somewhere on the autistic spectrum the question is where . I like being at home and coding some php or whatever. My successes with people vary but I don't have freinds. Anyway this is your thread so, once again, welcome to Wrongplanet.net .

Welcome, Cog.

I feel the same way about people. I enjoy my own company as well. The thing that I hate the most about interacting with people is attempting to make Small Talk just to be given a dirty look.

I'm sure that you'll like it here.

Cheers!

I didn't know an adversion to bright light was an AS characteristic, but that does make sense.... because I hate the sun. And I always make "I" statements!

Welcome to WP, Cog!

I know what you mean. When I found out about AS it immediately made sense, but I tend to second-guess everything so I went for a professional evaluation. I didn't tell the doctor, but I secretly hoped he would tell me I have AS because that would validate my own reasoning and allow me to have some peace of mind.

The problem with saying "I hope I have AS" is that most NT people will not realize the statement comes from a lifetime of confusion and depression and represents an answer. Those who have heard of AS at all will probably associate it with genius IQ and therefore think you're just trying to inflate your ego. They don't understand that the benefits of AS (assuming you can make use of them) come with serious deficits.


You are confusing "egotistic" with "egocentric". The former is the belief that you are superior to others (which I didn't get from your post), whereas the latter is a world-view in which your own needs and experiences are foremost. The egocentric viewpoint is a natural result of the reduced empathy that is typical of most aspies. After all, if you aren't able to decode the needs and intent of other people then your ego doesn't have much competition.

Welcome. Ps: I love your name.

I actually am superior to others- What's that called? Egorealistic?

Thanks for all of your replies, I do appreciate it.