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Hi, I'm new here. I'm 22 and my autistic brother is 20. I still live with my mom because I'm his caregiver and my mom still needs my help. To be honest, I'm afraid to leave. I would love to get my own apartment but i can't stand the thought of my mom being all alone. My brother is severely autistic and also has echolallia. It breaks my heart that I'll never have a real conversation with him. The only time he speaks on his own is when he comes out of his room to sing a line from a song then he's back in his room watching Disney movies and typing the credits on his computer. My brothers life consists of typing the credits on his computer so he can make a movie, watching the Disney channel, and jumping on his trampoline. We never take him anywhere anymore because it just stresses him out. Plus he's SUPER sensitive to certain words like, "no" and "don't," if he hears those words he just starts screaming and repeating it over and over. He also wants to wear long sleeves year round, even when it's 100degrees outside. On top of that, he HATES the ceiling fan so hell be sitting in his room, which feels like an oven, wearing a long sleeve shirt!

I wish there was something I could do but to be honest, I don't think he even understands that his world is so isolated. When he was little he would just start crying, not like a fit, just the saddest tears I've ever seen and I used to think it was because he couldn't communicate with me. I felt like I was looking at him through a fish tank.. He's trapped in this fish bowl and I'm on the outside tapping on the glass.

I'm rambling but I've never had anyone I could say these things to. Im so glad I found this website because even though I know every one is different I feel like I'm getting a tiny peek into his world. Reading through the posts gives me a little bit of insight into maybe what he is feeling.

(Thread moved from Autism discussion to Getting to know each other)

Welcome to WP

it's okay to live with your mom, but a job would be a good idea if you don't already have one.

welcome to WP.

Hello, welcome to Wrong Planet!

I'm sorry to hear that you are in such a difficult situation. My 12 year old sister is Autistic and she used to be somewhat like this. Luckily, she is developing rapidly and can now speak as well as an Aspie or Neurotypical.

I hope that this site will help you to gain a greater understanding of your brother and I hope you will find friendship and support here.

P.S - Introductory threads are usually posted in "Getting to Know Each Other", so expect this thread to be moved fairly soon.

I'm my brothers caregiver so I get paid by the state sorry about posting this on the wrong board! <33

what would your ideal job be?

Wow, that does really sound rough. As far as what he understands it is hard to imagine. But I would guess there is more, hidden from view. Perhaps he may give more clues someday. It may be more basic rather then complicated. All's I can think to say is I hope you find the strength when you need it and relief when you need that. Really you have multiple lives to think about, but do not forget your own. You must balance things, but ultimately having your own life (and perhaps family) is the priority I think.

I've never really given much thought to what my ideal job would be. Sometimes I feel like the only thing I'm good at is taking care of my brother. As of right now, I'm waiting for the next semester of school to start so I can enroll and maybe figure it out from there.

Thanks. Its hard to imagine leaving home and starting my own life knowing I'll be leaving my brother behind. I just ordered some books on Amazon for siblings with special needs to try and learn how to cope with the future. I feel kind of hurt and let down that my mother didn't think of these kinds of things when I was a teenager. I wish she would have found me a support group or let me know that I wasn't alone and there were other people I could talk to about this. Maybe then I could have started healing a little sooner.

Welkome to WP

Mick