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I'm new to the group and relatively new to the idea that I might have Asperger's. I have been rather disturbed by a few things at work lately that I know shouldn't be bothering me, but (as my husband says) I'm "obsessing." I am trained as a Secondary English teacher, but I'm working as an aid in a second grade classroom. I can't seem to adjust to the age group or the fact that I am an aid instead of what I am trained to be which is a teacher. It's really throwing me for a loop.
Then I started noticing some idiosyncrasies that I have. I can't seem to connect with anyone at work. Granted it's because I think some of what they talk about is pointless and stupid and irrelevant, but I'm starting to feel isolated and like I'm putting in all this effort and no one really cares. Then there is the crunching. I am getting so stressed out that I NEED to have something to chew on. Well, it's a school. No gum allowed. So I have been chewing on Ice Breakers. The more stressed I am, the faster I go through them.
I've noticed that most of the teachers and aids have absolutely no problems giving the kids hugs when the kids walk right up to them and invade space to obtain a hug. I can't do it. The kids to that with me and my arms go up in defense and all I can say is "personal space." I can't even stand for my own kids to get to close to me. And when I verbalize myself I get looks from coworkers that make think I've said something that maybe I wasn't supposed to.
All of this has had me so upset that I've pretty much been locked in my room (my safety zone) since I got home from work on Thursday. I took two separate online AS tests. The results of both said I have high autistic tendencies and should go in for further testing.
All of this has brought up childhood memories of special education classes that my mom made the school remove me from and how she fought to not allow any sort of testing to be done on me. And now I wonder what they wanted to test for and why on earth I am so different. Why have I never fit in? Why am I still so very different? Why can't I adjust?
It's been driving me up the wall. (Thus being locked in my "safety zone" for the past two and a half days.) I am looking for answers and can't seem to find any of them.
I have a preliminary appointment at the end of October, but I can't seem to switch gears. I'm not known for my patience.

If you can at least somewhat handle your job, continue. I don't think you would become a teacher if you didn't want to.

You'll never feel entirely comfortable with contact such as hugging, but eventually you'll get kinda used to it.

You should be lucky your evaluation is in such a short time. I waited for nearly all my life.

(Of course, you've been waiting just as long if not more, but I mean you know of the date)

Welcome to Wrong Planet!

Thanks everyone. I am getting in so soon because I wouldn't give up on finding a doctor. My husband calls it obsessing. I call it perseverance.
I forgot to put my score. I took the same one that most from this group have taken. I got 171 out of 200 for AS and 65 of 200 toward NT. I plan on taking that info to my initial appointment.

My impression of teachers touching kids is that, at least in the US, it isn't allowed because of the risk of false abuse allegations. Your fellow employees and employer would kind of have to at least allow you to not touch kids if you explain it like that.