Salutations!

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Hello all,

Greetings from the southern U.S.!

First, I'd like to state that I'm terrible at introductory posts. I'm rather nervous! I'm not sure that anything I'll say is worthwhile, so I'll try to keep it brief.

I am 30 years old, and received an AS diagnosis following psychometric testing from a neuropsychologist. I thought that the possibility existed a decade ago, but heard the following from my mother after asking what she thought: "There's no way you have Asperger's - you were tested for autism as a child and your IQ was over 140." I took the AQ and it indicated that I was very likely an aspie. Approximately two years ago, an acquaintance of mine (who has AS) asked me: "How do you function so well?" Somehow, I knew exactly what she was talking about; yet, I could not answer her query at that time (How do I function so well, given that...?). Several people I know have suspected me of having some form of high-functioning autism for several years now, but never told me. After lurking here for a couple months and taking a few more self-tests, I checked out "A Complete Guide to Asperger's Syndrome" by Tony Attwood from my local library. I recognized that I have/had many symptoms (I'm slightly less clumsy than I was as a child) and decided to talk to my general practice doctor two months ago. He did ask why I wanted to know, as I was "very highly functioning, either way" - I told him that I wanted to know what my own strengths and weaknesses were non-subjectively, and I wanted to let go of the things I would never be proficient in (after years of struggling and thinking that I'm dumb or must be lazy and useless). I also told him that psychoanalysis was founded on unscientific principles, and had concerns about being sent to what essentially amounts to a glorified pharmicist coercing me into taking a medication that could have deleterious effects (As a child/adolescent I was diagnosed with ADD, depression, general anxiety, social anxiety, and OCD). He chuckled and agreed with those sentiments, then gave me a referral.

I have a family history that, while incomplete, does include autism. My grandfather either had AS, or perhaps several traits - several family members, including my mother, have said that he was in possession of great intellect yet lacked "common sense." I remember that as a child, he didn't just humor me when I would talk about trucks, trains, or military hardware -- he was keen on sharing these interests. Also, he taught me how to tie my shoes (at 10 years old) by showing me how to tie them, instead of telling me. I have a nephew (now 24) who has classical autism and is intellectually disabled.

I have been married for the past 6 years, and have been with my SO for 11 years now. We have one son, who was diagnosed with PDD-NOS last year. He was not very verbal in the beginning, but has made a great effort to communicate his thoughts over the past year in kindergarten. My wife has certainly had a number of frustrations with me over the years, but has remained patient and understanding for the duration of our relationship. She wasn't certain of my decision to get diagnosed (snippet from that conversation: "...but you've been doing just fine!"), but has been very compassionate about some of the problems I've had. Apart from her having ADD, she is also a synaesthete, and has sensory sensitivities. We tend to sit in the same room doing different things, without needing to speak to each other. I think it helps our relationship.

I've been going on for a while now, but not too sure of what I should write next. I'm just glad this place exists!

Thanks everyone!

Hi bluerobot,

No need to be nervous around here! Your story sounds familiar. Sometimes when you are high functioning people mistake that for being 'normal'. That doesn't mean that you don't have the condition though, and have to put an enormous amount of effort into maintaining the facade.

I only got diagnosed a few months ago, and for me it was a huge relief, and explained a lot of things I had struggled with. So I can relate to you wanting the diagnosis, even though other people wondered why. Actually having the insight into why you have difficulties is invaluable. I spent years battling through life, and didn't know why. Now I have the answer, and it gives me the ability to look for solutions to things I know are going to be a challenge, rather than just having a meltdown and not knowing what was wrong with me.

It sounds like you have a really healthy marriage. Having a partner who understands your issues is great, and once you have the diagnosis and can explain 'I do this, or I need this because.....' it helps with the awareness even more.

Anyway, welcome to WP.

It's a pleasure to meet such a friendly character as yourself.
I don't know if I have Aspergers or some other form of autism, but I do appear to convey quite a bundle of their traits. Great to know that they have a supportive community for it though

Thanks! I wish I could stop being nervous, but I'm quite worried about saying something 'wrong.' I always have been, as long as I can remember. The solution is easy enough - stay silent, observe, learn the context and respond appropriately when spoken to. It is exhausting, though. I tend to avoid even online interactions for this reason.
I wish I could stop agonizing over how to compose/organize my thoughts! Written communication is much easier than verbal; but I have difficulty evaluating the cogency of my own statements, not to mention attempting to relay a story with proper chronological progression. When I received my diagnosis, I was told that I have deficits in planning and working memory that are highly incongruous with my IQ score.

I'm trying to stick to 1 or 2 posts a day; I still hear my father's voice sometimes: "You can't get better if you don't try." Other than that, I can't say I'm having a great time exposing myself to the gordian knot of human interaction that has grown out of the world wide web. I'm not even sure how long I'll post here, but I need to try in order to meet personal goals. I haven't communicated with anyone I didn't already know online since 1999(and I still just lurk on facebook, etc.). I've noticed that my anxiety increases with the number of participants.

Manjemon, I recommend diagnosis if you have the opportunity, but it is prohibitively expensive. Self-knowledge can't be a bad thing, as my grandmother used to say, "you can't hide from the truth, because that's all there is." Try to see someone with the prefix neuro- in their title, if you can.