So I'm another newbie. . .

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Greetings!

I happened to stumble upon you guys on my quest for knowledge. Let me start off by telling you a little about myself. I'm 31 years old, and I live in Michigan. I'm a Neurotypical myself, although I do have mild Cerebral Palsy, which was not diagnosed until I was about 13 years old. When it was diagnosed, it solved a lot of problems for me and answered a lot of questions. You would not be able to tell I have it just by looking at me. I do not fit the description of what most people would think of when they hear the term "Cerebral Palsy", which is someone who has it in the most severe form: Someone who is wheelchair bound, can't speak clearly, and has no control of their muscular movements. I can walk, I can speak clearly, and I can pretty much do the same things everybody else can, such as driving a car and things like that. It's my fine motor skills that pretty much suck. Except for walking and running and standing upright and things like that, my balance is horrible. Ask me to walk a balance beam or stand up on a pair or rollerblades or ice skates, and I will fall down every time. I also have very little strength in my hands, which sometimes makes opening things like a jar difficult. I will have issues with coordination due to the CP. I tend to be very clumsy and awkward at times. I also have Dyscalculia, which is a learning disorder very closely related to Dyslexia, but instead of involving words and reading, it involves numbers and mathematical reasoning. Pretty much anything beyond basic math is almost impossible for me to do. I was told when I was first diagnosed with the CP that the Dyscalculia and CP go hand-in-hand, and that many people with CP have some form of a learning disorder. This just happened to be mine. Cue the many years of stress this caused me throughout middle school, high school, and even college, which I never graduated from college because I just can't pass the required math classes to get my degree. (I was majoring in Psychology.) However, I passed all of my English and Psych classes with perfect or nearly perfect grades. Those are my best subjects.

Anyway, enough about that. I'm here to get help and advice. I have recently met a guy at work that I find myself falling in love with. He is really sweet, and super cute. He has all of the qualities I am looking for in a mate. He's kind, gentle, determined, he has a job and he's in college (A major improvement from my ex, who claimed he couldn't work while he was going to school because it was just "too stressful"). Several people that I work with want us to get together, and they all think we would make the perfect couple. A couple of the girls I work with know him from outside of work, and they also think we would be great together. I have liked this guy for awhile, and just recently I found out he has Asperger's. Doesn't bother me, since I also know what it's like to be born with something you have absolutely no control over. I feel like we would really have a lot of things in common, as I know we also have some common interests. It would also be nice to have someone who just understands that there are some things I just can't do. I'm working on getting to know him better, but I am doing it slowly. The very last thing I want to do is scare him away, which I know could be easily done. He will smile and wave at me when he sees me at work. I have told other friends from outside of work about this who have quite a bit of experience with Autism because they have autistic family members, and they are saying they believe this is a sign that he also likes me, but he just doesn't know how else to show it to me. I think I surprised him the other day when I said hi to him, used his name, and asked him how he was doing. He turned around and answered me, but kind of had a "deer in the headlights" look on his face. I will keep saying hi to him whenever I see him and continue to work my way up to eventually getting to have a conversation with him (If I can). I know that I will have to be the one to initiate everything with him, since he won't be able to do it, and I'm OK with that. I've spent a long time waiting for the right guy to come along, and who knows? He could be just the guy I've been waiting for!

I have been doing a lot of research about Asperger's so I can understand how it affects the people who have it and the people with whom they are close to, so I pretty much have a basic idea of it all, but then again, each person is different.

Anybody have any tips or advice for me?

You know, as a writer, I envisioned your whole (possible) relationship as a movie. It's sweet. The two of you getting together would present an enormous amount of challenges. As it is, "normal" people have a hard time relating to those of us on the spectrum. Complicate that with CP and it's almost a recipe for disaster.

I wish you two the best of luck, and in a more positive universe, I would've already started scripting your story into a movie.

Hey finchel

Welcome to the group and the best of luck in the relationship. It won't all be a recipe for disaster as previously posted lol. Just take it slow and steady. Smile and wave back. Then possibly a coffee or something like that later

Ps im new too. It's good to see so many members about

Thank you. I know a possible relationship with him could be rough, but then at the same time, I keep thinking I will never know what could happen unless I try. He could very well be that guy that I've been waiting for. All I know is that it's been a very long time since I have felt like this about anybody, and it's a very good feeling!

Finchel that's awesome.
Pm is open if you hit any bumps and need to chat

Welcome to Wrong Planet!

Well, I learned where I stand with him today. He is not interested in a relationship with anyone right now. He said he would not be able to give me the attention I need and deserve right now. Now I feel stupid. Here I was thinking that this time might be different than all my other failed attempts at relationships. What was I thinking?