I am 60, I am, and have always been, perfect. Being above it all I have looked down on the world in amusement. What we have here is a twenty-five watt bulb with a hundred watt darkness. Being dim bulbs humanity has to feel their way along, with lots of touching, and group identity social rituals. Without the constant social markers they quickly become disoriented and start coming apart.
They are primitive and insecure. without dancing like bees entering the hive, body language, or meaningless verbal exchanges, small talk, they cannot function. They quickly go into hyper danceing, and verbalizing, and if this does not get an affirming response, they become angry, threatening, and when I move to the side of them, my own dance, making eye contact with their feet, watching as they try to pivot and face me, becoming unbalanced, as they are, seeing the strange and non hive way I move, they flee.
While trying to coverup and protect myself from a school bully I accidently scratched his cornea with my finger nail. As he was the class bully, and I the nurd, I apoligised, but was once again rejected, he refused to bully me after that. Bruce Lee called the move a Dragon searching for Pearls. Humans are mostly hands and eyes, any move to the eye will be defended, and that leaves the neck open, push button one, then button two, and when they regain their wits, be standing behind them smiling. If they turn, the weight moves to one leg, and a small foot push to the back of the knee topples them.
No human is worthless, a very nice drum can be made from the hide.
All childhood is one long trama, no one is spared. The only thing worse is being a teenager. Family abuse, school abuse, and self abuse, combine, and the learning of the dance steps, the senseless chitchat is tiring. Instead of joining a larger world, the teen years impose walls, everyone you know is in the Ninth Grade. Can you think of a worse hell?
Being a young adult is no fun, Get a job, pick a major, and the social pressure to get married, have children, join the army, spend money, more than you ever had, now every symester. I hear whining from the AS, but at least some of you can pass math. Pushed out of home, what that dysfunctional group of defectives calls family, suddenly changing from, If you do not go to school the Truent Officer will come with the Police and take you, to You have to pay the price of a really cool car to the State if you want an education. Unless you are rich, Freshmen girls are working the Seniors, you have no chance, no one wants you, except McDonalds.
If you make it through, you have long had the desire to learn ripped out by education, all you want is a sheet of paper, for four years of your life, many thousands of dollars, and having all of the youth and life, all of the joy, smashed while you are forced to watch and smile. Now you are prepared to go to work.
Work is more demeaning than school, they only threaten to flunk you at the end of the year, at work they can have you clean out your desk, with the Security Guard watching, and out of the building in ten minutes. This is called job security. Friends at work are people who want to get to know all about you, so they can make sure you never get a promotion.
People who do not want to work are called mothers, their ticket is to start a family. For an hour's work they become set for life. It happens, and like grammer school, if you do not pay for it, the Sex Police come and put you in jail, so you cannot work, so you cannot pay for it, so you can be sent to jail. Some people prefer jail, it is just like home, the people who run it do not like you, but they feed you, and you can spend your days reading.
If you do pay, work two jobs, and save to buy a house, which now start at something the size of a phone number, the government notices you, and they send two guys in suits, named Vito and Guido to tell you the Don needs your help. Pay them, for they have nothing else to do. By the time you see daylight again you will be fifty, and send your own kids to college, with a smile, knowing what lays before them.
Now you can plan for your retirment. If you put away $100,000 a year, the interest will pay for the insurance, utilities, taxes, medical insurance, and all the dog food you can eat. As you only make $54,000, and you are being pushed out, you might become a greeter at Walmart, or go back to McDonalds. You discover that if unemployed, all that Social Security you paid evaporates. Your best finicial plan is to sell everything, buy a trailer, and live with a close packed cluster of others who retire. I hope you like horse shoes.
This is the NT world you are trying to enter?
AS is a long childhood, I was a teenager for thirty years, like all teens I was rejected, insulted, and the earthquake of 1343 that hit North China blamed on me. Like all teens, I apoligised, and the next quake hit Lisbon. They tired of listing my faults. If only I had become a mass murderer, someone people like, girls marry, but not liking people, I could not stand the involvment.
No one liked me, so I at least have that to be thankful for. I just hung out with machines, talked to them, and myself, and as I had a large wrench, not needed, the 12" Crescent is only for tightening the nuts on a human, I had a fairly peaceful life. Humans are sure they do not need to be fixed, but will pay well to get machines fixed, and as my material needs were low, I did well.
To me machines are pure logic, like computers, on/off is all, but people, being educated, are too complex to understand logic. I went from fixing cars, to being an IT Professional, cars are complex, IT is one step from nothing. All my tools fit in a brief case.
I made things, mostly one off, and thought I should make something I could sell thousands of copies of. I Patented a system of teaching Mathematics. Being me, in a world that finds math daunting, I chose the company motto, "Simple ideas, from simple minds." That has gotten a reaction I truly do not understand. What I mean is like Elegant Code.
The reaction was I was being culturally insensitive to myself. I am, but who cares.
Now all of the world I have known is fast fading, I have spent twenty years building myself, and the world is catching up. IT and machines are merging, they are becoming like me. Being a strange old guy is expected, gettting dropped by a nurd is nothing compared to being beatup by a Senior Citizen. It is my world now.
I was going to spread hell and discord, traditional business, but now that I have discovered WP, I see how to do it at a higher level.
Lil, you are free now, there are thousands like you, and you sparked one of the livest forums I have seen. Here you lead, but some of the coolest people are in their teens. I am sure they watch the old folks sit and talk about the weather.
01 Feb 2007, 7:38 pm
and found out about AS only a few years ago after 40+ years of pretending to be an NT. What a relief to drop that act!
