Yep, I'm New

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In an endless search to better myself and fix my irrational issues, I stumbled across this site here. Seemed interesting, so I thought I'd give it a shot.
You're welcome to address me by any nickname you'd like, I'm not picky.

As for about myself, beware, this could get a little long:

I came from a bad school originally. Besides that, life was pretty normal. I had a family consisting of a mother and father, and that was my entire world. When the abusive tendencies in my school came to light, about five years ago, I finally was able to switch schools, and ever since, things had started looking up.
I still had issues with people my age, of course, what with my Asperger's. But besides that, everything went well. Unfortunately, an unlucky chain of events was set into motion that same year.
In the past few years, I have seen three members of my family die. I was not close to two of them, but that's a different note. The third, however, was someone close; my father passed away, and thus, half of my "world" crumbled.

That was in 2012. In the year since, my anxiety has hindered me from even going to school, and I've been shown to have a ridiculously high tolerance to medicine. The many things I used to be able to do have been seeping away, and all I want to do is find a solution.

Which, of course, brings us to now. I figured I might be able to relate to some of you, perhaps hear of ways you cope with your condition(s), grief, anxiety, depression, or anything else of the sort. Medicine has not been working, circumstances have been preventing me from using external resources, and I'm running out of options.

Forgive me if I am to straight forward, or spoke to much here. Ah, but don't think my tone unfriendly, or intentions entirely self-centered. I'm more friendly than I appear.

Welcome to the planet!

Many of us are friendlier than we sometimes appear.

Welcome

I'm sorry to hear about you family; especially you father.

I understand the concept of your family being your entire world, and have lost many members along the way (though not always through death). My family was my entire world, until my world was broken apart.

My own father died in 2002, though I barely knew him. My mother took up another partner, who was much more present in my life, and I got along well with. Unfortunately they separated, and I haven't seen him in years now; though it may be for the best, as something had changed him, and he was not a very good person, in the end.

I was close with my sister, until she became a teenager. I never understood the transition that NTs take when they became teenagers, and so I lost my sister to this strange phenomenon. Though we're closer once again as adults, it's not the same; the 'bond' has been severed, and she no longer 'gets' me. On top of that, we fight a lot more, so there's often tension, that's bypassed with an unspoken politeness to keep the peace.

My mother used to be rather lovely. Whatever changed her former partner, must have effected her too, because I don't much like the person she's turned in to. She's become rather manipulative, and no longer feels the need to act like a mother should; which left me and my sister having to 'fend for ourselves'.

It's not quite the same situation, but I understand the need to vent, and the seemingly aggressive humour, required to laugh at the whole situation. The only way I've been able to deal with it, is to aim to one day arrive at a better place; full of happy people, and loving relationships. I work towards that one thought, and put all my energy in to ensuring that I get there, because frankly, that's all I've got now.

when you stop doing things because of anxiety, anxiety wins. gradual exposure can overcome anxiety. if you don't think you can go outside, stand in the doorway one day and put one foot out the next. you may need professional help to plan your rate of exposure.

anxiety is not dangerous. it only seems dangerous. no one ever died of anxiety. it's uncomfortable. it can't control you unless you let it. right now you're letting it.

if you can read at a high level, there's a book by steven katkin, PhD called the anxiety trap that also could help.

Welcome to wp.

I had lost many relatives also sorry for your losses.

Forgive me for replying so late! I've been quite busy with other things.

I appreciate all your fond greetings and tips to help me out. What you've said thus far will be kept in mind for future situations, no doubt.

Welcome