Could I possibly have Aspergers syndrome?

Post Reply New Topic

Hi all

I have not been diagnosed with autism, aspergers or any other form of mental disability. However for the past year I have obsessed over the thought that I could possibly have aspergers syndrome. I have quite a few symptoms of it, though not some of the main symptoms. However I am also female, and from what I have researched, it affects females differently. I?ll give you a breakdown of my experience, particularly as a child and whether it applies to me now. It?s hard to know where to start so it may seem a bit random.
- I was an extremely shy child, when I was very little it was to the point where out in public or outside home I would not say I word. Even when someone would talk to me, I just couldn?t get the courage to spit anything out and when I did it would be a whisper. I am not like this now, I still feel slightly awkward talking to people I don?t know well and I am still rather quiet. I know this is more consistent with social anxiety disorder, but hear me out.
- I always was a bit different from the other kids my age. I was quite mature for my age and hated all that kiddy stuff. Despised being treated like a child, I hated kid plates/cups/meals, the ?kids? table at family functions I just wanted to be with the adults. I did used to play with toys however and read kids books and stuff. I was like this until I reache about 15-16 and started interacting a lot more with my peers, I immatured a little in order to relate to them better.
- I was a massive day dreamer, I reckon I spent most of my child hood in my own world, most of my day was spent in a dream like state, with only smaller moments of being aware of my surroundings. I don?t remember a lot of my child hood because of this. I am a big day dreamer but I am much more aware of my surroundings then I used to be, even when I am in my own world I have a sense of what is going on around me which I didn?t as a child.
- I was a slow learner and had trouble with abstract concepts. However I never struggled enough to be too far behind peers, I never failed a class in school even in high school. However I had to work a lot harder to be at a certain level, a lot of kids could get As and not put any effort, if I didn?t put effort I would just be around C, I had to study hard to get As. Same with in university, I do well, however it can take me a long time to figure out what to do in an assignment.
- As a child I hated going anywhere I didn?t want to go especially if I was playing a game or something. Especially shopping was like a form of torture to me. If I was made to, I would have a complete meltdown and not be able to control myself. I am not like this now, I still hate shopping but I can handle going.
- I would take an interest ins omething and spend the majority of my time completely engrossed in that one interest. For instance I became obsessed with star wars, and at one stage watched the original trilogy 3-4 times a day every day.
- I hated being watched while playing with toys and stuff. A lot of kids love adults watching them because of the attention, but it made me feel intimidated.
- I hated physical touch of any kind, it didn?t hurt or anything it just made me uncomfortable. I am not like this now, I grew to love hugging.
- I was never interested in appearance related things and rather just dress comfort wise. Even as a teenage girl. I care a little bit more now, but still what I do in relation to appearance is bare minimum, I like wearing nice clothes but I won?t sacrifice comfort in order to look good.
- I do and have always spoken in a monotone.
- I have (or believe I do) a blank facial expression the majority of the time.
- I never had a trouble with eye contact, in fact I was a massive starer and always have been up til I was about 18-19 until I forced myself to stop. (sometimes I have ?breaks? in behaviour but I am better than I used to be)
- I am sensitive to certain clothing and tags and also very sensitive to glare.
- Socially I was always a bit awkward, I however was never fully outcasted as such. Kids were happy to play with me but would get annoyed after a while. As a teen I never fully grasped a lot of social boundaries, I seemed to have learned by observation and experience though.
- I used to have trouble recognising tone of voice and facial expression, I don?t believe I am so bad now.
- I don?t fully understand white lies, I rather be told the truth. . For instance if I had guests over for dinner and what I cooked was bad, I would rather them tell me that (in a polite way of course, no need to be rude about it) rather than say how good it was then bash it behind my back. I however, as much as I don?t like it, I do tell white lies only because its socially expected. If you are playing a sport in a team and yyou play badly, the coach will give constructive criticism, if you do an assignment poorly in school, you will be told so so why not in every day life as well? If we worry too much about hurting feelings maybe take away constructive criticism in every aspect of life and people won?t improve.
- Unlike a lot with aspergers, I actually enjoy going out and partying, even to clubs and stuff. I also do not follow a specific routine, I adapt well to newer situations however it takes me a lot while longer to learn and master new skills.
- I tend to say the wrong things at the wrong time or words things in a way which may sound or appear rude. I also have a tendency to offer help or take the initiative to help when it wasn?t wanted or I end up doing the wrong thing.
- I can empathise with people, however sometimes it takes a more serious situations to elicit a lot of empathy out of me, for instance if someone called my friend a bad name, I might just be like ?oh well, its only one name? but if someone was harassing my friend I would do something or try help.
- I still have trouble forming friendships, people tend to only tolerate me in small doses.
- I am very bad with directions and finding my way to new places, to the point if I get lost I?m lost and find it difficult to go back to where I was (this is assuming there were a few turns and not just a straight walk)
- I am not overly stupid but there are a lot of gaps in my knowledge, my general knowledge is not so good, and I don?t pick up on things as quick as others. When I do, I don?t remember them.
- I am very clumsy and don?t have the greatest motor skills, however with practise I can be ok with sports.
- I have a conventional sense of humour, however I always had trouble with timing with jokes and sometimes I joke around way too much.
- I tend to get clingy and not let people go, especially those who do not like me (usually only with those who do not accept me properly, I don't cling as much to those who are legit friends)
- I am not good at socialising in large groups and tend to remain quiet. 9 times out of ten I have trouble following a conversation and generally cannot think of things to say.
- I tend to adopt certain facial expressions or mannerisms of those i really like
- I have trouble recognising faces of people I recently met.
- I cannot handle being yelled at emotionally, I melt down. However I don?t have a bad temper, I am usually calm. I am also rather tolerant and forgive quite easy.
- I am tomboyish and always have been. Very little interest in girly things and enjoy ?male? activities a lot more. I do not wish to have a sex change or anything like that, I just relate to that way of living better. I am also straight/attracted to males.
- I have a lot of trouble summarising events/movies/stories. I could watch a movie, understand it but once someone asks me what it was about, I struggle.
- I find it difficult to take notes in lectures because I have trouble picking out the right bits, what to write down and what to not. I end up trying to write done word for word..

I know its long but, I was just wondering if you guys are able to give me an indication on whether I might have it or not. Thank you. Can?t really think of much else.

LOL....You're not so weird! Especially in this Forum!

Welcome to WrongPlanet, where everything is right.

If you are able, it might be good to obtain a diagnosis, to ease your mind a bit.

It seems to me that you might have a difference, rather than a "disorder" per se. It doesn't seem as if your difference interferes with day-to-day functioning much.

Perhaps you're within the Broad Autism Phenotype (BAP).

Welcome to Wrong Planet!

It's only a theory that females are different, it's not substantiated. And it's honestly (in my view) a very poor theory.

Shyness and daydreaming really have nothing to do with being autistic, and also some other things you listed. And the rest of your post sound more like minor personality quirks, and a few I guess would fall into sensory peculiarities. There's nothing there that really suggests that you're on the autistic spectrum. A little bit over-sensitive.

I guess BAP would be accurate. Like the first poster said.

edit*

Whether you have Asperger's, or are merely within the Broad Autism Phenotype, or are completely neurotypical, this site brings out the red carpet to you.