Hey, I'm new! Question about diagnosis!

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My name is Steph, and I'd like to tell you a bit about myself! I also have a question which I'll put in bold at the bottom, in case you don't feel like reading a whole ton.

Since I was younger, I was very frequently picked on, bullied, and ostrocized, with no real idea why. I never seemed to fit in. I just didn't understand what it took. And I don't even mean with just the "popular" crowd... I mean with anybody. It was really hard for me to make friends. I've only really ever had one good friend at any given time.

I am a very happy person with myself and have high self esteem. I am a bit of a workaholic, I like professional settings because they have rules to follow. I finished my bachelors two years ago and I'm now in a graduate program to become an Occupational Therapist. I never really thought anything was wrong with me, I always just chalked my lack of social circle up to being "introverted". I'm in a very fulfilling long term relationship with a man who adores me just as I am.

I didn't really even start thinking about Asperger's until I read about it in one of my graduate classes, and realized, wow. That sounds... a lot like me. The not understanding social cues/sarcasm, the formal way of speech, the clumsiness, the limited spacial awareness, the lack of close friends and the inability to make more, just a lot of things. I had to focus on my studies though, and put off looking more into it until now, with the semester being over and me having a bit of a break.

The more I read, the more I realize, wow. It's like I'm reading articles about myself. I'm very conflicted on what to do. Right now in my studies, I certainly see the value of being able to network and make friends. If it weren't for that, and my inability to participate in social groups, I honestly probably wouldn't care. But, if theres someone out there professionally that can help me with those things, I think it would be beneficial to seek them out. I've always sort of wanted to have close friends, but found it too difficult to get someone from an acquaintance to a friend. I've become pretty used to my isolation, and I suppose it doesn't bother me much anymore. But I wonder if I could be happier if I were able to get some help with these issues.

My question is, if you were diagnosed with Aspergers later in life... what was your experience like? What did you feel? Relief? Anger? I feel relieved to know that maybe my awkwardness isn't just me being weird, and has an actual physiological problem. I'm also scared because all I see about Aspergers is the word dissability attached to it (not my opinion, just what I've read). I don't want to have that label on me. I feel I'm doing fairly well in my life, I'm happy with myself, and being who I am. I'm worried that getting an official diagnosis might stigmatize me.

Should I seek out a professional, and get help with this? Or should I just leave well enough alone? What are your experiences? How did you come to terms with your diagnosis?

Thank you, I appreciate any and all input, and I'm happy to meet all of you (digitally, at least!)

Hey Steph welcome.

Myself, I went through many emotions over my diagnoses (aspergers) last year. In the end I came to terms and accepted it as it finally gave me an answer that I'd been seeking for many years. Though, admittedly, it wasn't the answer I'd have ever conceived of lol.

I'm not sure what to tell you about seeking an official diagnoses. It's really all up to you. I've been trying to come up with an opinion but am unable to.

Hello Steph, welcome to WP. I read your post and I think that the answer to your questions really vary from person to person. Many individuals find that after their research, their own judgement is enough and they self-identify as being on the spectrum. I myself am not that confident and sought a diagnosis from a specialist. After receiving the diagnosis, I went through a whole ton of feelings- from denial (even though I thought I had it) to not thinking about it for a while, to picking it back up and really accepting that "label" and becoming active in the community-- I finally understand why I've felt like an outcast and like I didn't get the book of social etiquette that everyone else seemed to. Of course, not everyone's experiences will be the same but that's what mine was.
Of course there's also some who think that as an adult, we've learned enough adaptations and scripts in order to be able to succeed in daily life, so there's not really a reason to seek a diagnosis.
You also spoke of the concern about the stigmatization of the Asperger's label- well, you really don't have to tell anyone unless you absolutely want to. That includes your employer and individuals in your personal life. I myself am very open about it (and it has actually helped my fiance and I become closer) but you'll find that it's also a personal choice and that how open you are will be dependent on your own life and confidence in the diagnosis.

I would definitely recommend you read posts on here since this is a topic that has been discussed many many times, with differing opinions from all sides.

Welcome! I was diagnosed when 31. It was not that big a transition for me as I had already been diagnosed at 10 with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. Perhaps because of this I do not have any negative associations with being labeled as disabled. To be honest, I AM disabled. My Misophonia makes functioning in a variety of environments difficult. It has literally messed my life up. The term "Disabled" can have a stigma in our society and that is terrible. That being said, I don't think an official diagnosis would hinder you. Somebody would just confirm it and should not affect anything unless you want it to.

Welcome to Wrong Planet!