Hello everyone. I'm new here. I am married with two beautiful little boys, 5 and 3 years old. I've suspected that there is something unique about my 3 year old since birth and the suspicion just keeps growing stronger. I had him evaluated by early intervention at 18 months old, but they dismissed my concerns and said he seems fine. My husband won't listen to me and the rest of my family thinks he's fine, just unique.
At 6 months old, he began having breath holding spells. The spells look like seizures, but are really induced by an emotional trigger. When triggered, he will cry out, stop breathing, turn blue, twitch, and eventually pass out. The spells used to happen every day, but now have spaced out to every few weeks.
He is incredibly hyperactive. He is in constant motion, will not nap, and can take up to two hours to fall asleep (sometimes as late as 11pm) after literally running all day long. I can not seem to get through to him regarding rules and consequences. Traditional consequences have little to no effect on his will to make poor choices. I cannot have a conversation with him, except if it is truly interesting to him (usually about cars, superheroes, music, or numbers). He will only give eye contact when he initiates a conversation about his favorite subjects. When he is engaged in his favorite toys (usually cars), it takes quit a bit of time to gain his attention but it's nearly impossible to keep his attention. He will respond for a moment, but his mind usually drifts right back to his preferred activity. When his play is interrupted to do something non-preferred, he will most likely overreact--screaming, throwing himself down, or running away. No explanation of why the activity needed to end seems to get through to him, even if you present it with a preferred activity following the non-preferred activity. When he is preoccupied with an activity, he will engage in it for hours if you let him and any interruption can be a battle.
He overreacts quite a bit, actually. For example, he had a half hour tantrum this morning because I made him waffles instead of pancakes. He will have tantrums over very little things, like having to take turns, share, or when asked to do something he does not want to do. Getting dressed in the morning can be complicated because he wants to wear a particular shirt, whether or not it is weather appropriate. He usually chooses long sleeves. He has a few quirks revolving around food. He always says his food is too hot (when it is only warm and at perfect temperature for the rest of us!) and I often end up putting it in the freezer for a few minutes. He will only drink apple juice, plain milk, chocolate milk, or almond milk. If the food is mixed together (like a casserole), he will often refuse to even try it.
I often refer to him as my nutty little professor. When he talks about something he is interested in, he has no grasp of how the other person is responding. He will continue to talk about it. His voice is sometimes sing-songy and will sometimes stutter a few times over his words before he can spit out what he is trying to say. He has an extensive vocabulary and will use bigger words like reflection and definitely. He is reading at a 2nd grade level and he hasn't even entered Pre-K yet. His fine motor skills and coordination are not totally there yet. He has trouble trying to write (even though he knows the alphabet and then some) and is still struggling to peddle a tricycle.
He also has little concept of danger, as long as he feels in control. He will run into the street, climb high structures (like standing on top of the couch or table), and will engage anyone he meets (strangers included). He will engage with his peers as long as they're on a topic of his interest, but does not seem to be able to sustain the interaction for longer than a few moments. He his very social...sometimes overly so. I think he almost makes his peers uncomfortable, but most adults find him charming. However, he has strange resistance to activities where he feels out of control, such as going on the slide or swings. He is always fidgeting, rolling around, putting his feet in the air, jumping up and down, and RUNNING. Always running.
He has been in a structured day care program for a little over a year now and it seemed to have reduced the amount of tantrums he was having at home (he once had a tantrum because someone picked up a fly swatter and put it away--and NO, he wasn't even playing with it!). He also used to repeat movie scripts often through out the day (especially the movie, Cars). The daycare leaders say he does extraordinarily well in their program. The program consists of mostly structured play activities, but he has a lot of freedom to choose for himself there. I am concerned that once he enters preschool this fall, that he will have trouble adjusting to a more structured setting. He is very bright and very charming and I think that he will succeed academically. I just want to able to provide him with the supports he needs to succeed, if that is the case.
I have a lot of experience working with people on the spectrum, but mostly with very profound intellectual disabilities. This is new ground for me and I'm not sure if I'm just hypersensitive to it because I have been in the field so long or if this is what's truly going on. For the first time yesterday, a friend approached me and asked if he has Asperger's. She thought I was going to be upset that she asked, but I was more relieved honestly. For the first time, I felt like I wasn't crazy and it was comforting that someone else sees in my son what I've known for a long time. I guess I am here looking for some validation of my concerns. The internet provides very "cookie-cutter" type descriptions and I'm not sure that they really describe my son.
Any advice, words of wisdom...anything really...would be greatly welcomed.
05 Jul 2015, 3:39 pm
