Hi, I'm new!

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Joined: 28 Jul 2015
Age: 30
Posts: 2
Location: Quebec

28 Jul 2015, 2:19 pm

Hello, everybody! My name is Olivia.
I was diagnosed with Aspergers when I was 18, and am now 20 (turning 21 in August)
When I was younger, I was always the "ugly duckling" and the outcast. I didn't have many friends, and I was very socially oblivious, so I turned to creating an external persona (more or less acting and dressing up to fit in) that I could use to make friends and be accepted. This worked out well, because my psychiatrist told me before my diagnosis that I "was too pretty to be on the spectrum" (how terribly revolting is that?) and people tend to tell me that I "seem normal" (even though I burn myself out trying to be socially acceptable and am torn apart by severe hypersensitivity.)
I've suffered from depression since I was about 12, and I also have polycystic ovary syndrome.

I joined this site so I could feel less alone in my suffering in a world that sees me as so "normal" and puts such high expectations on me that I usually cannot live up to, I am tired of feeling so lost in this world. Exactly as if I was on the wrong planet. I hope that I can express myself in the most honest and true form possible here, since I always put on the illusion of everything being ok in the real world.

I am a musician and a poet, I guess. I play flute, violin, bodhran (an Irish drum), penny whistle and sing. I want to go to college for music. I adore classical music, european folk songs, metal and pretty much anything else.
I like history, philosophy, culture and languages as well.

Looking forward to exploring the site and meeting new people
Cheers!