I am a new user. I know that I am not an old user, for my hair is not as white as wool. It probably could be sheared as of now, but I staunchly refuse such unspeakable nonsense. When my long locks daintily brush my shoulders, I commence a formal haircut. My shoulders are very dusty, so no haircut is to be administered unto me. Period. Now, where was I . . . . Oh! Yes, the salutations. I am Jacob Alexander, more precisely " The Clown". I, however, despite my given name, am not known as either. Alas, not one knows of my existence, save my family, our neighbors, and our fellow parishioners. To them, I am merely a strange object of creation, a natural disaster, the world's greatest fool, an outcast, and a Russian ret*d. Pardon me if you find the last name offensive, but I am originally from Russia, and what better name is there to call an innocent being with Asperger Syndrome? I personally detest the name. . . . but my temper tantrums as a child . . . and my odd appearance. . . . and the fact that I am not a student at Harvard University hath earned me my poor reputation. Well, I have an IQ of 141, so methinks that I have HFA (high functioning autism), not Down Syndrome, unless you would factor in the fact that I am always "down". And who cares if I am from another country? I believe that the Russians would be offended at America's treatment of their intelligent ones, albeit they often do not fit in and have adjustment issues. Oh, well. So I shalt from here on be called " The Clown ". And clowns are funny. So you will expect funny things from me. . . . .as well as some serious things. I hope that you enjoy my postings!