Undiagnosed and Unsure

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Hi! I guess the title says a lot. I'm just learning about aspergers from doing some research, and... well, idk but I feel like some things are finally clicking? I mean I am not sure if that's the answer or anything but some of the things make a lot of sense to me. Hey, maybe someone will read this and say "Actually that sounds more like x" or something. That would be cool too.

I don't think I can really count how many times people in my life have said that I was "cool" (not, like, awesome cool but, like, cold) or "cold-hearted" or "uncaring". I think reading that part of it (people thinking that without it being really true) is what first started me thinking.

Or how many times I have asked (either to myself or out loud) "but why" when someone tells me about an emotional response.

My routines are everything to me, and I don't like my schedule or routes changing all too much.

There's more but I don't want to set out a laundry list of Things I Feel Apply to Me... Not sure anyone wants to read that.

I am not sure about getting diagnosed? I have a lot of trouble with doctors because they never really get what I am saying? Maybe they don't listen, idk, or I'm bad at explaining stuff when I talk. Thinking about typing everything up, but wouldn't giving a doc a handwritten note be weird? or a handtyped as it were. Either way, going to the doctor is daunting and frustrating and I am not sure if I have enough to say to get taken seriously. So here I am.

Nice to meet y'all!

Hey thepuff welcome.

Actually I think giving a doctor/counselor a list of your quirks is a very good idea. If you have problems talking to people then a list can kind of do it for you. Also with a list you don't have to try to remember it all at their office.

Hi, thepuff, welcome to WP

If you're looking to get diagnosed, RoadRatt's advice is a good one. That's how I did it when I started my journey to get my diagnosis.

Accepting a diagnosis will change, forever, how you relate to the world.

If you're lucky, it might change the way the world acts on you too. I haven't been that lucky yet, but it can't be ruled out.

Undiagnosed adult autistics tip balances, demand too much, assume the impossible. They're everywhere, and they insist on being treated as though they were normal. Accept diagnosis, and you've contributed some tiny fraction to changing that.

Your choice.

Welcome to Wrong Planet!

Peterd gives good advice, there. In fact I have never seen that point of view expressed before.

No one can make the uncertainty you feel go away. You'll seek a diagnosis when you're at the right place in life to do that and accept it. Maybe that's now, maybe next year, maybe never.

Welcome to WP.