Newbie says "hi"

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Hi!

I am new to the board, and would like to say "hello" to everyone and introduce myself. I am a 46-year-old mother of one child, a boy named "Ian" who has Asperger Syndrome. He was officially diagnosed when he was six, and is the love of my life! I feel very lucky because so far he is very loving and thoughtful, and doesn't seem to have the anger spurts that I have seen in other children with Asperger's. However, he does get intensely focused on specific topics; namely, Star Wars, baseball, and world history. He also has problems with writing and focusing, and has some coordination problems which make it difficult for him to particpate in regular P.E. He is also quite socially akward, and recently lost a "friend" who says he is "sick" of hearing about Star Wars. It breaks my heart to think that his life is going to be so difficult on a social and perhaps career level, and that is why I joined this board. I love my child very much and want to see him happy. Additionally, I need support to learn how to help him through the hard times, because sometimes I feel so helpless with him. I want to be able to teach him how to cope, and to maintain high self-esteem. Perhaps others here can help me with that.

All that said, I am just glad to be here, and look forward to getting to know everyone. And mostly, I am

hopeful4ian

Welcome to WP! I know of a great Star Wars website: Wookiepedia. I've had that as an obsession as well.

Typically, when you lose a friend because of something you do, it's because they can't be bothered to put up with it, most often this can decide if they're a good friend or not. I'm not sure if it's temporary though.

Welcome to WP.

Welcome to WP!! !

First off, I can tell you that just being there for your son when he needs someone to cry on or to listen to his rants, will really help him. Its what my mom did and still does from me which is helpful. One thing I know my mom did from to help me socially was to put me in situtations where I had to interaction with people, like order my own food at a restaurant or fast food and asking a question at a store. For me at least, this really helped me because I feel comfortable in these place and do have problems with the interaction. Also, something else that might help you is to read books by Tony Atwood, because he talks about how to help people with AS. Well, I hope that helps you.

Hi!

Hello. Does your son get to go to science-fiction conventions? Those are generally great places for those with asperger's.
I have to look up wookiepedia. One of my daughters has autism plus and she tends to roar and groan and hoot. And she used to be extremely violent. One day I was reading about a research project with siblings, and I realized I had never asked the other kids how they felt about living with an autistic sister. Her older brother was in the room, so I asked him what it was like. Just then we heard her roarsqueal in the basement. My son said, It's like living with a wookie in the basement. Ever since then, our family motto has been, Let the wookie win.

That's a great story, Lelia! Thanks for the laugh! And yes, KBABZ, he does enjoy Wookiepedia!

Ikonantz, thanks for the great advice!

Neuromancer asked:

Reading your mesage I was wondering why do you "think that his life is going to be so difficult on a social and perhaps career level"?

Maybe I should have said that I worry that his life is going to be so difficult on a social and perhaps a career level. As a parent, I can't help but worry about his future and if he will be able to function in the world without help - as right now he needs plenty of it. My husband and I are older, and he is an only child, so my fears are magnetized by the thoughts that we may need to take care of him for the rest of his life, and there won't be anyone around to be able to do it. Yet at the same time, I am hopeful for him because I see so much potential in him that others don't necessarily see. I guess you can say I am pulled in many directions emotionally about this, as probably many parents here are, as well. That emotional rollercoaster is another reason I am on this site. I know I can not be the only person who feels this way about their child. I want to find others who I can talk to who understand how I feel, and can help me find ways to help my child. Realizing my worries, such as you just pointed out, helps me, because now I can start to work through it. Thank you for pointing it out to me.

hopeful4ian

Welcome to WP!

Tim