lzermane wrote:
I love my stepson, and I promised him the day I agreed to marry his father that he would be just as special in my heart as my three biological children. Learning my stepson, scratch that, my SON, has been a joy and a frustration. He is a great kid, full of love and kindness, but he is lonely. My son is 15 years old. His dad loves him more than anything on the planet, and I watch them struggle with how kids treat him, inability to maintain friendships, and a mounting level of anxiety and depression, My son because he is experiencing it, and my husband because he is witnessing the pain. I suggest ways of getting him to socialize (something that both his neurologist and therapist say is greatly important for his success), but when my son objects and says that he'd prefer to stay at home in his room with the computer, my husband concedes. I don't want to overstep, but neither parent pushes him toward socialization. I know that there are so many complex feelings involved here, but just wanted to know if anyone here has dealt with this issue. Thanks so much.
I can definitely relate from my own teen years. It can be tough socializing while being true to your boundaries/limits. Perhaps your son is feeling a lot of burnout and so the idea of socializing may feel like returning to trauma/things which cause more anxiety and depression. But, as you said, it is important for him to do and he may want to, in his own way. What have you tried? Anything geared toward his special interests which he can do on his own terms (i.e. a time limit and amount of people he can deal with) would probably help a lot, though that can be difficult to find.
17 Jun 2016, 4:01 pm
