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Hi! I’m not sure if I have autism/aspergers but I’ve always wondered if I do. Whenever I take those online tests, it says high probability.

I never got diagnosed because I do good academically and have gotten jobs. But I needed a ton of support along the way and try hard to mask my quirks.

Some signs:
-I have difficulty making friends, always ate alone at lunch, and am socially awkward.

-I have always had obsessions and would research them a ton. For example, I like collecting certain Japanese dolls and know all about them.

-I am sensitive to loud sounds. For most of my life, I hated music because it was like nails on a chalkboard. Only this year I have found relaxing music that I like when I’m alone. I still hate concerts and music playing in the car.

-I can’t carry conversation in groups of people. It has to be one on one or I get overwhelmed and can’t follow the conversation. I relate best with my friends who have autism.


But yeah, maybe one day I’ll seek a diagnosis. See ya around!

ようこそう！(Welcome/Bienvenue/Wilkommen/etc).

Friends : I just dislike associating with most people. I find time with most people to be unproductive.
I also tend to eat by myself, unless invited somewhere, because I don't get hungry at regular/set times/hours.
Have you considered that it is them who might be having difficulty making friends with you ?

Researching is always a good skill; this keeps you from being hood-winked too easily by propaganda.
Have you found other people or possibly groups who do the same kind of research that you do ?
(I have to keep researching what so-called society knows as «Law» and comprehending it is a real pain in the~)

Sounds : Come to think of it, I've been so research-oriented lately, that I now rarely play music...
Although I often think to play binaural-beats/isochronic-tones whilst doing work in order to increase productivity.
You prefer to stay/remain/be where it is quiet for you, is it ?

Convo : We've just had a convo right here (sort of; depends on if we ask each other questions).

Diagnoses from psychiatrists are usually accompanied by some drug (many of which have adverse so-called «side-effects» and surrounded by controversy; I personally call them the effects). I don't think official-diagnosis is necessary unless your cognitive thought-processes are being disturbed/disrupted such to the point where you cannot handle every day functions of life to where you would have to apply for so-called government aid and needed evidence from what they call doctors or psychiatrists. Even then, out of all of the research that I have accumulated over my life, I have always found there to be much safer and effective alternatives than are promoted by mainstream.
Knowing this, do you still have a strong desire to have an «official» diagnosis ?
(And, by the way, when I was «diagnosed», I was told that I would know more about it than they did; there were seven of them. Yes, the industry is still largely... undecided, and ASD was removed from the DSM as a diagnosis starting from version V several years back, and now just lumped in with HFA, although there is still ASD amongst the «international» manuals)

I do admit I can be pretty unapproachable because of my avoidant tendencies. I usually wait for other people to talk to me first which doesn’t help. lol But I’ve realized that I often prefer eating alone because it’s less stressful.


Fortunately I’m alright at finding people with common interests. But I get so nervous that I eventually stop talking to them. lol


Interesting, I’ve tried listening to binaural beats and they make me sleepy hehe
but yes I definitely prefer being where it’s peaceful and quiet.



I’m hoping a diagnosis would give me some clarity and understanding personally. I also went through a time where I couldn’t function and couldn’t leave the house for months because of my mental health. I worry that might happen again. Particularly when my parents are gone because I’m pretty dependent on them. I’d like the option of getting help if I needed it.
It also might help my counselor understand my situations better.

The only con is that I’m just worried that a diagnosis would change the way people see/treat me.

If you don’t mind me asking, how helpful was a diagnosis to you? Did it give you any peace of mind or clarity?

Greetings and salutations. You should be careful, being a gummy anything, you're liable to getting eaten. Joking aside, enjoy your stay.

oh no i will be careful lol! thank you!

Was not so much helpful to me as it was more helpful to other people who used to always blame me for all of their problems (who were actually the ones that always ironically caused said problems). I actually never saw anything wrong with myself, for I had always been logical throughout my life (not irrational), thus it was actually somewhat annoying to me to have been «diagnosed» (with anything) at the time, but the «treatment-team» kept on insisting that it was a good thing to have (citing names like Albert Einstein amongst other people throughout history who had «insights» that the rest of the general public population did not; although Nikola Tesla was actually the true genius who was light-years ahead of Einstein).

The fact of the matter is that, particularly amongst «mainstream» so-called America, a visit to any psychiatrist is virtually a guaranteed «diagnosis» for something. The DSM consists of over 950 pages worth of various configurations of behaviour-patterns and thought-beliefs, many of which are actually just normal reactions to every day stressors of life, but is somehow defined as a mental-disease, usually accompanied by a drug-prescription. Considering the size of the book, and the DSM «bible» consisting of just about everything that people may experience in the «life» phenomenon, I could accurately go so far as to say that there is no such thing as anybody in existence who cannot be «diagnosed» with something (unless you know enough about both the law and science to be able to intimidate them into fearing a lawsuit for false-diagnosis/mis-diagnosis like I did).

I suppose you could go get an evaluation if you feel that having an «official» diagnosis of something (anything!) will give you peace of mind, but I'm going to tell you straight, visiting any of them is virtually an essential guarantee of a «diagnosis» for something. The way I handled it was basically, doing unto them what they did unto me, with my own counter-diagnosis of their quirks and behaviours. The manner in which all of this so-called autism stuff was historically/originally described was actually so offensive that some of us who were said to «suffer from Asperger's Syndrome» had to come up with the description of «Neurotypical-Syndrome» to illustrate the point of how and why we deemed it to be utterly derogatory (and hypocritical).

When the head-doctor's assistant wrote things down about me like : «Has a tendency to sometimes move and gesture his hands when responding to my questions.»
...I had to go ahead and necessarily write stuff down about him: «Appears to be pre-occupied with looking at a clip-board and writing onto an attached paper every 15 or 30 minutes after glancing at patients.»

...just as a brief example of how «ridiculous» I thought the whole thing was.

Then I did another similar thing when fraudulently forced to be held at a psychiatric-facility not too terribly many aeons ago, essentially taking their diagnosis-reports, and returning versions of my own on them, and one of the front-desk staff-members who read through my documents then said to me : «I have to be honest, man; I can't say that I don't absolutely LOVE this...» (I gave them [the doctors'] «diagnoses» like «Excessive-Need-to-Diagnose-Non-Conformists Disorder» and «Taking-Answers-Out-of-Context Disorder» and other similar descriptions).

Anyway, I think it is also important for you to know the differences between a «Type A» Personality versus a «Type B» Personality (i.e.: internal-authority versus external-authority; one type will usually be very goal/action-oriented, due to the «clock» being something of an external-authority, where activities get done like clock-work; although the psychological make-up of many of us is not such a «black-and-white» set of simplified labels; I might deem myself a Type C or type B-D due to either shared characteristics in some or even fluctuating type-patterns).

What «Type» would you consider yourself to be ? Or would you have any preferences towards being more like one or the other ? I suppose a major factor is that I have enough knowledge/experience in life to the point where I can near-always determine my own answers (accurately) without the need to rely on any outside so-called experts.

Welcome GummyDinosaur!

What you talk about sounds like signs of ASD. You have to think about what the diagnosis will have for value for you; what the advantages and disadvantages are.

Enjoy the forum!

Welcome!

I think you're probably ND but a professional diagnosis would put your mind at ease. I have several traits that some ND's do (burning out in social situations, failure to make eye contact at times, like solitude, collecting, etc.) and some that ND's usually don't (like parties, loud music such as metal, like socialising, going out, etc.) so I had doubts myself.

As for you, I think it'd be best to find a professional to test you. Some of the things you mentioned, like not enjoying being in groups, I happen to feel likewise. I don't have big circles of friends, just one or two. The music thing of course is different.

Anyway, regardless of what you choose to do, I hope you enjoy your time here.