Hello everyone - And asking for help about my condition

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Hello everyone, I am new to the forum. Thanks for this place to share thoughts and info.

Short info about me: 32, male, doing a phd in engineering.

I am thinking that I might have Asperger's (or something similar), but I cannot be sure. So I would be happy if someone is willing to share their thoughts/comments.

Reasons why I think I might have Asperger's: I have never, even once in my life, actively felt the need to take part in a social activity. Very rarely, I go out with friends or do other social stuff, but these are always just to keep them happy or because it felt wrong to say no, and not because I wanted to go. Also, I rarely enjoy these activities (or, rather, I enjoy them only partially. For example, if I am out for 3 hours with friends, I enjoy only maybe some parts of it here and there totaling about 30 minutes where interesting-entertaining conversations take place, and the rest of the 3 hours feels like a waste of time). I mostly enjoy keeping to myself, playing video games, watching movies/shows, reading books, or doing research on my chosen academic field.

Reason why I think I might not have Asperger's: I read on some places/papers that people with Asperger's may have difficulties with humor. However, again according to people around me (family/friends), I am not only good at understanding other people's humor, I am also (apparently very) good at humor myself and I make people laugh. I also enjoy it.

Reason I am on the fence about it: I also read that eye contact is an issue. Weirdly for me, I prefer to actively make eye contact only when I am listening to a certain person, but when I am speaking I tend to actively avoid eye contact.

Anyway, thanks for reading. Any thoughts/comments are greatly appreciated.

Since this is your first post welcome to Wrong Planet. No one on this site is qualified to make an official assessment for ASD or Aspergers. Having said this, there are on-line tests that can provide you with an approximation. They are called AQ test. There are several on the Internet. Here is a link to one. Autism Spectrum Quotient

Also you might read up on the condition. One book to start with is "The complete Guide to Asperger's Syndrome" by Tony Attwood.

Hi and welcome thracian22 . Good to have you with us. As jimmy mentioned, it’s impossible for us to diagnose you, though as we get to know you more, and learn more of how you “present” in certain situations, and day to day life, it can become a little clearer. Here’s a checklist of signs in adults(though you’ve probably seen one already)...Signs of ASD in Adults Eye contact and humour are poor indicators if you ask me ... there are some very funny folks in the spectrum, including comedians. Eye contact, can be easier for some, than for others. No two people on the spectrum are truly the same ... do you think a diagnosis would benefit you? How were you throughout your childhood? Any particular issues, behavioural, sensory avoidance etc? All the best with your engineering phd.

In my mind Asperger's is the fringe; it's "too" much relative to NTs. It has been portrayed in the past as the very inexpressive and very eye-contact avoidant, the very serious etc., but it's also the very expressive, the very staring, the very intellectual humor... When I go through an official checklist for women, I match 90% and still I doubt. After all, when life is quiet and good I feel completely "normal". I think the way I see things is completely "normal". But when I get stressed, overstimulated or excited, my differentness shows. In discussions when I set up (or request) the visual, my differentness shows. In social situations ---when I am myself, I'm somehow doing my own thing.

My eye contact style is similar to yours. Let's one of us get a DX and compare notes.

Welcome to WP.

Welcome, I don't have have much to add to what everyone else has said. There is alot of difference in how something like aspergers/autism shows itself in a person. Stereotypical features like not making eye contact or disliking social interaction don't apply to every person on the spectrum. I'm a social aspie who likes interacting with people and seeks them out, but I'm then very tired from the effort cause it doesn't come natural to me. I'm using my intellectual process to understand people and to inform my social responses and if the discussion doesn't interest me then its very hard work.

Welcome to Wrong Planet!