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Hi I'm new here. I first heard about this website 10 years ago back in high school. I've been reluctant to join as I am ashamed of being both autistic and adhd even though I have a job now and manage to live on my own. Still despite my success I'm unsure what to think about myself most of the time. Hopefully being here will help.

Hello and welcome to Wrong Planet. Do not feel ashamed. Just enjoy being who you are.

I guess you like the Ink Spots

They were a great vocal group and were a great influence on subsequent great vocal groups.

Welcome

Welcome to Wrong Planet!

Welcome to Wrong Planet!

Thanks I'm not entirely sure rather or not to like who I am. While I have some qualities that can be considered good they can also be considered bad guess it just depends on the situation.

Forgive yourself. Autism and ADHD is not a choice or a behavioral disorder. They also come with strengths. You are not alone.

I'm still feeling unsure of myself and I dont know why. I finally managed to graduate from college, get a job, and move out on my own despite having autism and adhd, but the diagnosis of autism and adhd will always be there. Sometimes I still find myself wondering if all I have done even matters.

Yes, it is complex. Some days will be better than others. But like many things, it is a process of trial and error. We are all going through this (even NTs question a lot about their experience). Naturally, our predisposition to anxiety and depression don't help, but those can be overcome--it is just chemistry.

I have found this a good read: ACCEPTANCE AS A WELL BEING PRACTICE

I embrace the attitude that we are different, not wrong.
And, as Tony Attwood would attest, many of our problems are the result of trying to cope with a neurotypical world.

Am I right...do you like the Ink Spots?

Welcome to the Planet. ..

Welcome!

From your posts it sounds like you are doing a good job navigating life. Many people are not doing as well as you even though they are older than you. And when I say "many people" I am including NTs.

I'm guessing you should get used to feeling "unsure", however. It is hard to know what might have been, what could have been, what should have been, etc. It is difficult (at least for me) to know how all those other people feel about their lives; I suspect there is a lot of uncertainty and doubt out there.

Your autism and ADHD will always be there. But Sun Tzu suggests you should know your enemy and know yourself. I read that us autistics develop "coping techniques", I know I have a few. (Though, I did not get the ADHD upgrade so I probably look lazier than you.) I suggest you can learn about autism and ADHD and use the knowledge to tailor your own coping techniques. For instance, I was about your age when I figured out I should carry pen and paper because my memory is so useless; now you can get 3"x5" tablets of paper in office supply stores that are perfect for the job. Also, over the decades, I have developed a dry sense of humor which I find helps smooth-over some of my social awkwardness. Maybe you can develop your own tailored arsenal of coping techniques.

Good luck. Have a good life. Try to do well and don't be too hard on yourself--because it won't do you any good.

I'm not so sure about looking up more on autism and ADHD. For some reason I feel so ashamed of having a disability despite being successful even with it. Maybe I'm just trying to talk myself out of being even more successful by telling myself that nothing I do matters.

Butterfly picture tests ? In black and white .