Stranger in a Strange Land

Post Reply New Topic

Hello everyone, I found this forum through a book I'm reading on being diagnosed with AS/ASD level 1 as an adult.

The last year and a half has been an adventure - in November 2019, I was diagnosed with stage III lung cancer (and I'm not a smoker, so that was great), then as soon as I finished concurrent chemoradiation and started immunotherapy, covid hit. I was recently diagnosed as ASD level 1, but of these big three events, my diagnosis was not a negative to me. I have no issues with my diagnosis, but I am trying to gain a better understanding of, well, everything. Obviously the diagnosis along explains A LOT, as I've spent years trying to "normalize" myself. Now I understand that my behavior is completely normal - for me.

I'm working with the therapist who helped diagnose me to begin gaining more understanding of myself, what I can work on, what "normal" looks like, etc.

So, happy to be here! My first question; I have always dreaded upcoming events, even things I am sure I will enjoy, like vacations. My wife loves to get excited and talk about upcoming events, and plan plan plan, but all it does to me is create anxiety that I can't really explain, and makes me want to stay home. I'm working on explaining this to her, and fortunately she really loves me, and has taken this diagnosis in stride, but I'm curious - how many of you experience this, and how have you explained it to other people, and what strategies have you developed so that both people, the AS and the planner are both happy(ish)?

Welcome to WP! I think you will find some nice people here.

And I sincerely wish you a best-possible outcome on the cancer. It's not a good thing and it's not a convenient thing and it's not a pleasant thing...but stay the course and, ideally, someday you'll look back and think "Well, that was not fun!"

ASD-1? Yes, the diagnosis explained so much!. I got my diagnosis shortly before my 65^th birthday. I preferred to tell my relatives in person, as much as possible, so I did not tell many folk (other than medical providers) about the diagnosis for awhile.

And by the time I'd told my not-too-interested relatives in person it was tax season and then surgery season (I'm old). About the time I was clear of all of that there was a Pandemic. I'm an Aspie, I'm an INTJ ^{with a very strong "I"}, and I am firmly retired--I'm well-equipped for hunkering down at home--though I miss fast-food.

The Psychologist who diagnosed me offered counseling but only mentioned it, she could tell I was doing OK. I have been relying on wandering around the Internet to get information. My bride has been quite supportive, and I think she found my ASD-1 diagnosis less troubling than my surgical adventure; she is Neurodiverse (ADHD) so that might have helped.

When my bride bumps up against one of my Aspie traits I get to say: "I have a doctor's note for that!" This amuses me much more than it amuses her--she was groaning at it before we even left the Psychologist's office!

One possibly practical thing I can offer is this (and other stuff on that web site). I say "possibly" practical because I've not had much success with it, yet--as before the diagnosis I ask my medical providers to put stuff in writing and explain things very simply...and maybe they do and maybe they don't.

And, again, welcome to WP!

I also found out about this forum through a book! Welcome.

welcome to WP , good luck with your wife and explaining it. i hope the best for you and your health

Oh my, that probably wasn't the life of adventure you hade been wanting.
At this moment on this day I don't have any strategy ideas to offer.
But when looking at your profile/avatar image I get an odd urge to thank someone for all the fish.
And where's my towel?

a Robert Heilien fan pardon spelling . love the title of this thread

Well, if you can't explain it, maybe it has nothing to do with autism. Maybe you just have problems going outside of your regular daily routine.

Personally I dread anything involving traveling or being in busy places for long periods of time (like more than an hour or so) because the visual over-stimulation gives me migraines, I cannot sleep in unfamiliar places, and the noise and need to continually concentrate (on driving, listening, or watching for public transportation, for example) fatigue me.

So I order things online rather than going out shopping, bring ear defenders, ear plugs, and sometimes music and ear buds, try to travel and run errands during parts of the day that have only light traffic, and I avoid vacations, traveling, attending large events, hanging out with more than one person at a time, or doing anything that requires me to be away from home overnight.

Welcome, I love your avatar image

What book, may I ask?

(I'm putting together a list of helpful books for my website.)

Anyhow, welcome to Wrong Planet!

Welcome

Welcome to WPea!

Note: EskimoSpy last visited WP on April 12--the day they posted the OP, also their only post (so far).

Given the medical issues they listed, let's hope they're okay.

Agrees hope the best for them .