A little about me, if that's okay...

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A little about me...

I am newly diagnosed with Aspergers, I am a mother of four children, my oldest AS, two NT in the middle and my youngest, not sure what she has, some sort of PDD ~ ADHD perhaps.


My son was diagnosed two years ago at the age of 18. At the time I think I was actually in denial about my own symptoms, thinking myself very much NT. After my sons dx, I naturally began to read more about the condition, and assisting him with his AS difficulties, I began to look back on my own experiences, and as I began to peel away the layers of denial, questions surfaced about who I really was.
Growing up being different was nothing but painful for me, and I now realize that I took on what I can only describe as a shell of coverage to try and fit in with everyone else. I would watch others, behave as they did, and that seemed to work. I was also a very good mimic, and I lived my life pretending to be anyone else than who I really was, to the point that I was denying myself, and living as someone else. Someone in denial.
As I learned more about Aspergers, I began to look back on my own difficult, friendless childhood. My late teens and early twenties of substance use as a means to ‘fit’. My failed marriage, filled with years of anxiety and depression and a totally perplexed ex-husband who was confounded by my inability to socialize, preferring to stay in the bedroom rather than face visitors, and the unending arguments because of all my differences.
I looked at my own family, after my sons dx, I recognized others in my family with AS traits. I was also very aware of my aunt with Rhetts syndrome.
When I read the books, seemingly about my son, I would stop and think, hey, that sounds like me. I ran through the diagnostic criteria:
No friends, check. obsessive interests, check. rituals, check. stiming, check. Touch and audio sensitivity, check. difficulty with eye contact, check. The checks went on... It was time to seek diagnosis.

Now that I have been diagnosed, so begins a new journey. A journey of discovering myself for who I really am, and accepting that person. Yes. I am different from the so called ‘norm’, but hey, there are other people like me, and I can start liking that aspect of myself that I tried so hard to deny for most of my life.
So that is me. Please say ‘hello’. I would like friends of my kind, it could be a totally new experience for me, actually ‘fitting’ somewhere!

Hi!

Welcome to Wrongplanet!

I hope you enjoy posting here!

Welcome to WP!

Tim

Hey. Welcome to WP

Hail and welcome

Welcome to WrongPlanet

NO THAT'S NOT OK!
heh
welcome

Thankyou for all your welcomes.
The fact is, I have been with WP since my son was dx, but I just wanted to mention that I have, myself been diagnosed.
Cheers.

I'd also like to say I'm pleased to meet you. I know you'll fit right in and we're glad to have you.

You are very welcome!

Hi! I am new to WP. I have two boys, 8 and 12. My oldest has been diagnosed with AS recently. My youngest is being home schooled this year because of public school problems. They are both on ADH type med. I have not been diagnosed, but I know I have it and my dad had it. I am divorced and the kids live with their non-AS mom in Texas. I am planning to go to the doctor to get diagnosed soon. I have been in denial all my life and am very good at mimic-ing others.

I've heard AS affects more boys than girls, what is NT? I can only imagine what it must have been like for a teenage girl. I have never met anyone else who had this until today. I am 38 years old.

Welcome to you as well!

I can very much identify with what you said above.



NT = neurotypical. Wikipedia entry here.

Hi Mojo123, and thanks for your post.
It is nice to know we are not alone...that there are others ~ mums too, like me.
If it is at all possible to get a diagnosis for yourself, I would recommend it. It helps. Once I had learned about AS thru' my son having it, I knew I had it also, it just made so much sense. Still, having a dx is a relief.

Yes! Me too!
The mimicking of others really works, doesn't it!



I don't know the statistics, but yes more boys are affected.
However, my therapist said it was also a lot harder to diagnosis girls then boys. Girls not being as 'obvious' in the AS traits as boys.
Something about how girls 'adapt' more, with the watching of others, and the mimicking etc. The coping strategies become more evident rather than the AS.
Yeah, being a teenage girl was hell.
Still, I had my intense interests and inner-world, so that helped!


Well, it is nice to meet you.

Welcome Shivani and Mojo

I have only known that I had AS since April of this year. I am sixty-five. I didn't know who or what I was all that time, I only knew that the person I seemed to be was not the real me. I hope that you will be, or already are, thrilled as I am, to finally have found yourself, like an oasis in the desert, just there waiting for you to see reality at last.

Thank you Cosmiccat.
I think I can begin to see this new reality as thrilling!
Certainly beginning to discover the real me, instead of covering me up, may very well be.

Its kind of fun... its like a new thing to study; yourself! Breathe a sigh of relief, there are others out there like you. Welcome to the planet.